Is it just eccentricity or something else?

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I don't know if this is the appropriate area for this topic... But I guess I just want some feedback from you guys. Opinions and whatnot. I'm not, in any way, looking to get diagnosed through the internet, but I have (and have always had) questions about myself. I want to hear, from your perspectives, what you think might be going on.

From the time I was a young child, I've always noticed certain differences between myself and others. I've grown up thinking that it was just uniquely me, that each child possesses certain special quirks. And to a great extent, this is true. But during college, my Intro to Psychology class got the wheels in my head turning. Some of my own characteristics are similar to those outlined in the "symptoms" of Asperger's. It wasn't the kind of phenomenon where you study about certain illnesses and then freak out because you think you might have this, this, and this. No, I legitimately saw a parallel between me and Asperger's. Except, there were other things in the criteria that weren't characteristic of me, so I mostly just shrugged it off and told myself that I'm being paranoid. But in studying it further, I find that textbook definitions aren't necessarily the rule, right?

So, tell me what you think from the following:

-I didn't learn to walk until around the age of 2. My mom tells me I started taking steps around 11 months (still kinda old), but I fell on my butt and was too scared to try it again. The extent to which this is completely accurate is subject to questioning. Aside from this, I never did the whole crawling thing. I only scooted.

-I have a really big shy problem. I had a lot of trouble making friends in school. Most other kids thought I was a little weird. I frequently sang to myself on the playground. I had one or two friends at a time, but no more than that. But that was okay. I felt safe in small numbers.

-I loved rocking back and forth when I was younger. The rocking chair was my favorite place to be. And if I was in the car, I would often rock back and forth in my seat. This stopped around age 7 or 8, when mom told me people would think I was ret*d.

-I had an obsession with rocks. I would go outside and just look for rocks, all kinds of rocks. I really loved anything with fossils imprints or something that had crystalline features to it.

-I also had a big problem with furniture rearrangements. I cried when my mom would rearrange the room.

-The rocking thing came back around high school, though it was only in rocking chairs. I had a routine of sitting in my rocking chair and listening to music. If friends would come over, they'd have to wait while I got it out of the way.

-I don't have a big problem with eye contact. I did a little when I was younger, but nothing that I can really remember as significant or noticeable. However, if I'm looking into someone's eyes for a long period of time, I start feeling strange and uneasy somehow. Maybe that's just a personality thing.

-I know familiar sayings and all that stuff, but I have a hard time with jokes sometimes. Especially the subtle kind. I usually end up ruining someone's whole little act because I don't get it until a minute or two later. Everything translates quite literally for me. I usually end up asking them what they're talking about.

-The shyness got better with time. I still feel extremely awkward. But I can carry on normal conversations, and having jobs where I had to be talkative helped. But I still have a problem finding appropriate responses to someone I don't know very well. Once I get comfortable with familiar people, though, I look and sound extremely normal.

-When I get extremely upset, I flail my hands up around my head. Doesn't happen often unless something really mentally upsets me or if I feel like I can't handle something.

That's about all I can think of right now. When I read back through it though, I still feel like it can be slightly ambiguous. But I've never had any issues to where someone recommended me to go see someone. There was one time in primary school where the guidance counselor took me out of class a few times during one week because she said she needed me to talk. She noticed that I rarely said anything or interacted in class activities when she made her rounds in the school each week. Other than that, nothing. I've never been to see or talk to anyone about my little quirks. Not like I could go now anyway. I lost health insurance when I was 21.

Anyway, maybe you guys can shed some light on this for me. Even if it did seem like a great possibility that I exhibit some classical behaviors, I probably wouldn't go to see anyone even if I had health insurance. I feel like I do very well for myself as I am. Things have gotten more muted over time. So it's easier to move within the confines of society. If it's just that I'm a little odd, then that's okay too.

sounds more like PDD-NOS which is basicly a blanket diagnosis for autism but with certain criteria not met. When I took my psychology class, I learned that I also have OCD which was amazing cause I used to feel so alone in my obsessions and compulsions that no one else could understand me. It was a relief that it had a name.

But PDD-NOS stands for pervasive developmental disorder-not otherwise specified.
Usualy that is given to those who meet the criteria in most ways but not all.
Pdd-nos can vary in severity from low functioning to very high functioning.

The rocking thing is called self stimulating behavior which is a common ASD thing, often refered here as "stimming".

I walked on time, but I fell often...much until I recieved physical therapy and they found that I had mild paralysis on my left side.

Thanks for the response. I forgot about the Not Otherwise Specified category. Though that category has always somewhat eluded me when I've read about it.

I understand that you're "not, in any way, looking to get diagnosed through the internet," but I think you just eliminated AS as a possibility -- at least according to DSM IV: "III. The disturbance causes clinically significant impairments in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning." According to what you wrote (and I quoted above), I don't think you meet this criteria.

On the contrary, I've read through many of the posts on here, and many of those with AS, despite the social difficulties, have done very well for themselves. What I'm suggesting here is that even though someone was legitimately diagnosed with AS does not mean they aren't capable of "adapting" over time or learning how to cope with the environment around them. At one time or another, however, they probably did encounter a number of barriers.

And with that said, I feel like the problems I had held me back a lot when I was younger (whether it was something worthy of being diagnosed, I don't know). I didn't do great in school, as many teachers commented to my mother that I seemed a little aloof at times. I didn't do any better in school until I was much older and felt a little better about participating.

I will say, though, that I'm aware these things tend to run in families. My younger brother was diagnosed with a serious case of ADHD, and my little sister has picked up the rock fascination I had. Being that I'm 14 years older than her, this was not caused in any way by me because I pretty much stopped with the rock thing when I was in 6th or 7th grade, something like that.

I agree. Some people have, indeed, done very well for themselves. I think many people would put me in that category, actually. But, this is not "contrary" to anything. Someone can do very well for himself and still exhibit clinically significant impairment in important areas of functioning. That's where you would find me. You can find others who screen well into probable AS territory during clinical studies and who do not receive diagnoses because "none of those meeting criteria complained of any current unhappiness." See, e.g., http://staff.science.uva.nl/~michiell/d ... Al2001.pdf at 12.

Many people, however, have not done very well for themselves. I would suggest reading more posts, particularly about people's career and relationship problems. It's often not very pretty.

Listen, I don't mean to be overly rigid with this. Some people do not endorse the DSM IV criteria in all their glory. My opinion was that your disinclination to seek professional help because you're doing very well on your own is inconsistent with the "clinically significant impairment" element of the diagnostic criteria. But, you're totally free to disagree with me, the diagnostic criteria, the DSM IV -- and you won't be alone. You're also totally free to self-identify as autistic if you want to -- and you won't get push-back on that. I don't think anyone (other than you) has anything personally invested in that decision; and so long as you don't ask for people's opinions on it, I don't think you're going to get them. It's pretty personal in the end.


What I doubt is that anyone has been legitimately diagnosed without meeting the DSM IV criteria. (DSM IV does not set a particularly high threshold.) You could look at it this way: most people don't get diagnosed by accident. Most start seeing a mental health professional for something that would be considered clinically significant impairment -- depression, anxiety, etc. -- and sooner or later find themselves on the spectrum. I don't think it typically happens in reverse.

To an extent, we've all learned to adapt and cope. We learn to "fake normalcy" in a way -- and with varying degrees of success. I don't know if you're suggesting that someone with AS could have the ability to sort of grow out of it?


I don't know what a clinician would say about any of these things other than likely agree that there's a strong but poorly understood genetic component. The psychologist who diagnosed me was not overly interested in how well I did in school (at least academically); and she wasn't at all interested in anything sibling-related in my case. I suppose she would have found it significant if a family member had been diagnosed with a spectrum disorder, but she wasn't after anecdotal evidence.

It sounds autistic-ish to me, for whatever that's worth. Maybe BAP - Broader Autistic Phenotype - which is having autistic traits but without them really hindering you enough to qualify for a diagnosis. If it was more of a hindrance it could be PDD-NOS. You can have autistic traits without being diagnosable as autistic and it could still make you feel like you don't quite "fit".

I don't know how people here feel about "Broader Autism Phenotype." (That's a straightforward statement -- I honestly don't know.) Is it the kind of thing that someone who isn't autistic, but for whatever perverse reason really wishes he was, can latch onto? I did a limited search for it, and I discovered that you can take a Broader Autism Phenotype diagnostic quiz at OKCupid. http://www.okcupid.com/tests/the-broad- ... otype-test For whatever that's worth...

i would consider the "inability to recognise the help of others as valuable and reluctance to ask for help"as a good symptome of AS, myself ....

I'm not sure what you're quoting from...

i was quoting my own brain, based on this.
Sorry dr, didn't want to interfere between you and your patient....

Since autism is a spectrum and appears to be genetic, it makes sense that some people (often people with an autistic family member) have enough of the genes to genuinely feel "different" in the world, but are not so affected that they need or qualify for a diagnosis. Both my parents have significant autistic traits (we're a very strange family) and when they combined their genes, they got me, who has significantly more autistic traits and more autistic-type problems than either of them. (I also have a cousin who is autistic. I am convinced it is genetic.)

I think your post is inconsiderate and I don't understand why you feel the need to be so nasty towards this poster who has come here asking for advice. You must have major insecurities or something.

I said that "I don't know how people here feel about 'Broader Autism Phenotype.'" I also said that it was a straightforward statement. I've read only enough about it to know that it's a controversial issue. I've also read enough (on WP) to know that, for whatever reason, certain people seem sort of "bent" on finding themselves on the spectrum. I truly don't understand that.


And I think you have a pretty low threshold for "inconsiderate" and "so nasty." Everything the OP wrote in her initial post sounded right on -- except for the fact that I don't think anyone in his right mind would say that she meets part III of the DSM IV. I pointed that out -- hoping, actually, that that would be relieving -- but it wasn't. She wanted to argue around the DSM IV criteria, and I said that she was welcome to do that as far as I was concerned. I encouraged her to make up her own mind and assured her that no one would question her on that decision. I don't think that was inconsiderate or nasty. If you look back through the thread you'll discover that my "inconsiderateness" and "nastiness" didn't have anything to do with the OP asking for advice. She hasn't been here in some time, actually. Where I was apparently inconsiderate and nasty was in questioning the legitimacy of BAP. And I'm not alone in doing that.


Yes, I do. But, you didn't see them on display here. I told the OP that I didn't have anything personally invested in her decision to identify any way she chooses.

It wasn't necessarily that I didn't feel like part III of the DSM was relieving somehow. It more felt like you were saying that none of my statements had any basis because of this particular stipulation. Maybe that wasn't what you were trying to convey, but it just felt negating at the time, which to some degree, was offensive. True, I don't have clinically significant impairments as far as functioning, but I won't say that it's not a struggle sometimes just to know when and where and how something is appropriate to say or how it should be emphasized. I may not be worthy of being diagnosed, and that's okay. I was more looking to see whether there were others out there that could relate to me, diagnosed or not. I wanted to know, based on others' opinions, if it was plausible to say that I at least exhibited some autistic tendencies (which is really hard to know when looking through DSM's literature. They don't exactly provide examples. I figured I'd try to ask people who probably knew more about it than I did, on a personal level). Trying to find a place where you belong is hard. Trying to find people that understand you is even harder.

Well, WP is a forum for people on the spectrum. The people who come here generally are looking for answers relating to this area of themselves that they don't understand, and they ask questions because they want to know if they are on the spectrum or not, if the reason thy feel different could be related to this. I would have a harder time understanding if new posters came on here asking if they might be psychotic....they research it, find similarities, and then ask questions.
I know the insecurities that come with being on the spectrum, when you have never been diagnosed with anything else than "that weird kid"and have been trying to invent a persona for yourself that might fit the mold ,for decades, never quite succeeding.
Those people all ask questions because they don't feel their personality from the inside anymore. passing will do that to you. It's only after you know who you truly are that you gain confidence enough to TELL people who you are, instead of asking them.
My advice here is always the same though: read a lot, if you fit in, you will feel it. that gives people more confidence than "nah, youdon't fit all the criteria". so what? i don't either. i appear to be functionnal. but i never noticed i functionned this well because i was cheating before i knew about AS. i could not support myself. yet i managed to live 30 years without noticing, and just thinking i was lazy. i wouldn't say i need help either. I will keep on cheating. lots of people do that, and the Op might be doing it without realising it, because admitting weakness in the world he has been raised is shameful and dangerous. That doesn't mean he is not AS, and that's for him to discover, it is nobody's business to tell people who they are. they should discover it for themselves, that's the only way to be sure.

This



sounds nasty to me.

If you want to really question the idea of the BAP, you should use research, experience, some kind of legitimate evidence. Attacking other people's character or attributing negative motives to people you don't know is not a legitimate way to question a theory.

As for how people here feel about it, I'm sure there are a variety of opinions. As I said, my own opinion is based on seeing how autistic traits have been distributed in my family, with some members having a few of them but enough to seem odd to others, and some members having enough traits and with enough severity to be diagnosable/diagnosed.