As best I can

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When in Rome do as the Romans do. Except if ya don't really know what Romans do. I think the aspie comes out all of the time, but because most people don't have a definition of it you just get labelled a loner or a social geek. I'd rather be identified as a failed NT LOL...it beats the labels that come with being identified as not normal. Is there a difference LOL well I'd rather not give people who don't like me more of a reason if ya know what I mean.

In my own group of friends and in my own space I can be myself but with restraint in the workplace. Thats probably true for everybody.

I'm having a bit of trouble parsing what you just said, but I'll do my best.

With the Romans thing, I assume you mean act like NT's, unless you don't know how to. I know this feeling. I sometimes just force myself to be quiet when I don't know what to say or how to act, and sometimes I even say I'm tired and a bit out of it as excuses for doing so.

I personally wish people would mind their own business. I know some people who are able to channel being not normal and make themselves seem eccentric and people like them for not following the norm. A guy I work with is like this....I'm almost positive he is an aspie based on things he's told me. I wish I was more like him.

With my own friends, I still have to restrain myself, and it sucks never being able to be myself around anyone, except for when talking to people on this site or in the wp chatroom, but I guess that's life for an aspie*

*Currently undiagnosed. Working to get diagnosed.

LoL

I call mine "social incompetence".

You can get social competence training with www.toastmasters.org.

It's way more than public speaking. The best bit for me was how to do "spin" or how to say the truth in such a way that the person you say it to will be pleased to hear it. In toasties, they call it "evaluations".

I call myself socially ret*d at times (when you take away the negative meanings given to the word ret*d by society, it really is an apt description). I don't think I have it as bad as a lot of people I see on these forums though.

lol must have some very signifagent meaning to some people, as I notice many use it where it doesn't belong. That would be anywhere.</rant>
I digress.
I don't understand what you are saying, but I will try to respond.
Being a failed NT is just as bad as being not normal. Both fail socially, if that is what you mean. And if I'm going to go down, it ain't will the crowd.

That is EXACTLY how I used to explain myself to people-I'm sorry, but i was bullied at school so didn'ty learn hoew to properly sociually interact, I'm afraid I'm rather socially ret*d."

This may sound awful, but it';s good to know that other people know how that feels. I no longer feel so alone.

Julie

Well, I don't say it too often to people, generally just people I know and am close to. People tend to equate ret*d with mentally ret*d, so people often get the wrong idea if I were to say that im socially ret*d to most people (not that there is anything wrong with being mentally ret*d of course, we're all born a unique way).