saw my therapist today, 1 step closer to a diagnosis.

Post Reply New Topic

i just saw my therapist this morning. i haven't seen her in about a year and a half.
my god was it good to see her lol. i left her office feeling more in control of my life then i have in years. i forgot how amazing it is to have such a positive person in my corner.

anyhow i asked her if she's ever heard of asperger's. she lit up haha. i told her i'm about 80% sure it's what i have at this point, and she immediately agreed with me.
she said she doesn't know enough about it to diagnose me with it, but there's another therapist that works there who knows a little about me who told her that he's convinced i have it and told her this a couple years ago lmao xP. i find it funny that another therapist who saw it in my years ago and told my therapist hehe.

it turns out that this guy actually takes special interest in asperger's, has training in it, and has several clients he's currently working with who have it.
i would've never have guessed there was a specialist in my tiny town lol.
my therapist is going to ask him if he'd be interested in talking to me and seeing what he thinks and if he thinks aspergers is what i've got.
she's pretty sure he'll be excited to see me. she says he really loves helping people with asperger's. . .(i wonder if he's got a loved one with asperger's or something. just wonder why he's taken such an interest in it.)

but now i'm kind of nervous lol >.<"
what if i fail his tests or whatever the heck he does to determine if someone has asperger's?
lol i just want a diagnosis dam it! i want a "label" to what's wrong with me!! ! i want to know that i'm not just "broken" but there's actually reasons to why i'm so flawed in life.
i know a diagnosis is just a word. . .it wont fix me, or really do anything. it's just a label and that's it.

but at the same time i can't help but think that having the "label" would in some way be a relief to me. at least i'd know there was a reason why i find some things so challenging. i'll know that i'm not just a mistake, or just "fundamentally flawed" as i like to call it.
and i'd like to think it'd give me a better idea of what direction i need to take in my life.

i don't know lol. . .just felt like rambling i guess >.<"

were any of you guys excited to get a diagnosis?
i don't "want" aspergers. . .but i do want a diagnosis i can agree with that i feel "fits" me. . .i just want to understand lol.

it was an amazing session with my therapist. i really feel like i'm on the verge of a new (good) chapter in my life. . .and it's awesome to have her and her positive energy back in my corner.
i'm hoping a diagnosis will help me.

I'm glad to read about someone's discovery and assessment/diagnosis process going so well. As soon as I see the lady who comes to my meeting sometimes, I'm going to bring up the topic again. I believe she said she works with clients aho are Autistic as well as with some who have Asperger's. She has a client who is high functioning but clearly has problems in some areas, IIRC. She does not do assessment/diagnosis. But she does know someone who works at her agency who does. I will ask if she and the other person will read my posts here before I would consult with the person she knows.

The only thing that scares me is the lady said that I might qualify for the services of a sort of job coach who would advocate for me on my job as far as accomodations needed for me to be most effective at my work. That is a little scary because it seems that this would give my supervisor license to say that something is "wrong" with me to the point that I really shouldn't be working there and use the process they are going through to reengineer delivery of services to clients to justify eliminating my position without it looking like they did something to discriminate against me.

It is great to have someone in your corner, though, who believes in you and wants to help!