Humorous Faux pas

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I admittedly have a screwed up sense of humor. As awkward and embarrassing as it can be at the time, I also find looking back, I can often laugh.

I have a response or greeting preplanned in my head, but when I say it I realize how inappropriate the response was. Like, after talking to someone about a funeral they are going to that weekend, ending the conversation with "have a good weekend/trip".

Anyone else have these incidents that stick out in memory that we can share a laugh over?

I can certainly remember, at a major birthday party in my honour - and my brain was racing too fast - when somebody greeted me with "Happy birthday" I automatically said "Happy Birthday" back to them. Hmmm, I doubt that it was their birthday too that day. Goodness knows what they thought.

"Have a great trip."
"Thanks you too."



Usually I just make really random comments or swear at inappropriate times or forget manners. Lol well, thinking of it now, don't I sound like a charming person? xP

I'm so comfortable with my 'social scripts' that I sometimes whip 'em out at the wrong times. For example, I'm so used to clerks telling me "Have a nice day" and my standard "You, too!" reply, that it's always the last thing I say as I leave. So sometimes the conversation might be something like:

Clerk: "Here's your change...thanks, come again."
Me: "You too!"
Me:
Me: "Um...I mean, I will."

..and then of course I exit the store feeling like a complete moron.

When I was in high school and calling a classmate to ask about homework if I was absent, I remember saying "Hi, it's [person I was calling] is [my name] there?" rather than the opposite--my "script" got reversed. Oops.

I was so used to answering the phone in a certain way for work that I started answering my cell that way too. "Hi, thanks for calling ___. How can I help you?"

Well, heck - I'm an NT and I think I've done this one!

We NT's have our own automatic responses, too, and sometimes, much to our chagrin, they don't match the situation.

I've done that sort of thing too.

When I was growing up, my grandmother proudly pointed out to me, that I would soon be taller than her. My very cheerful response was that several people in my class were already taller than her. I only found out that I said something wrong because my sister explained it to me.

I just did that tonight.

"Enjoy your pizza"
"You too".

I use rote responses to get through that stuff, it's not my fault if they don't match my program.

I give up. What's wrong with that?

I dont get it either.

Slightly different class of glitch: I once came very close to getting fired when I left the boss standing on the floor while I went out back to search for the elbow grease.

(For those who do not know, "elbow grease" means "hard work." He wanted me to push the mop harder.)

My grandmother was pleased that I was getting taller. She didn't care about the other kids in my class.

hey that's exactly what I was thinking of...I have done this a couple times.....once I said "happy birthday" to someone on my b-day who had wished me a happy birthday and the other time I said "you too" in the same situation. Many social rituals involve parroting back what someone says to you "hello" "hello" "goodbye" "goodbye" , "take care" "take care" so I think through force of habit I have done this a couple times on my birthday..

his/her grandmother was probably very short, which might be offesensive to a short person.

Well one of my many faus pas happened while just waking up/
I went to an impatient brain injury rehab facility after a very serious seizure that caused loss of oxygen to my brain for several minutes...anyway at this facility, there were these loud speakers that were going constantly, mostly saying someone had a phone call on the outside pay station. Well often times it was Jennifer_____.
Well I was at home and my brother was waking me up, and I handed him an imaginary phone and said "Jennifer ________, you have a phone call on the outside pay station" in the nasal voice I often hear over the speakers He laughed so hard he about fell over. I thought it was funny too, but not as funny as the time my brother was screaming at me in his sleep about a chicken on the exterize bike, but that is another story for another day.

During the funeral reception of a close and respected colleague, his elderly kins came. my question "Who are all these old people". Then I realised they were his grandparents. What a duhhhhh moment.

-During his wake party at my house. I acted very inappropriately like an asshat. Because I though that's how Irish honoured their dead with wild revery, and Ron was the life of the party at many of my brother's gatherings. (I though that by reinacting the usual conditions and atmospheres that we used to celebrate in (but that was in the past when the friends were very young and in Jr High, -High School (I often booted for them, gee... I wonder if the delivery person had any brains at all, coming to a house in the suburbs, the same house weekend after weekend, with lots of pairs of young teen's shoes around (especially the cute girls' ones), and wonder why me the only adult was the only one who seemed to be around.

Anyways, the friends grew up, and matured and found this as a very distasteful thing I did. (now that we think about it, they realise that I was just trying (in my drunk mind, thinking it was ok to act like a drunkard A.H. in leui of ron). I even put on a DVD of Toxic Avenger 4. (he and I were movie Geeks, watching B-movies, and the indy scene of Psychobilly-rockabilly, and other Freaky Geeky stuff of the like). There was a sex scene on it, and the girls were mortified thinking I put on some porn. But I was extremely inhebriated, and kept on laughing. Much to the anger of the guests.