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Jamesy
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21 Feb 2011, 11:14 am

When you see a weird autistic person and compare him to a normal person (NT) the difference in how they behave is very noticible. Its funny though because seeing how 'normal' people behave from our perspective seems quite an easy concept to grasp and copy but actually it is not. Even if we try to act like the normal people there is something our brain which makes it VERY hard to do it?

The problem is as well when trying to conform and copy other people we could also easily forget and let ourselves and act weird without realising it. its like we think we are behaving normally but to others we are not.

Do you think i raise a good point that being normal is a lot more complex to us aspies than we think?

What i am trying to say really is that 'normal' to us aspies is not as easy as it looks. trust me i thought conforming to normal would be easy but it turned out to be a nightmare.



emlion
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21 Feb 2011, 11:20 am

Who wants to be normal?
I think once people get to know me they like me because i'm a little bit off.



Jamesy
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21 Feb 2011, 11:38 am

True. LOL i can imagine it must be really dull having a 'normal' NT brain.



emlion
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21 Feb 2011, 11:39 am

I definitely don't envy those who all think the same way and follow the crowds.
Boring, boring times.



Philologos
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21 Feb 2011, 12:49 pm

Normal is not even statistical, really, but a social construct.

My wife's father grew up in a type of community where he performed well and was readily accepted by relatives and neighbours as normal.

Had he grown up in my type of community, he would have been weird and handicapped.



wavefreak58
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21 Feb 2011, 1:33 pm

You continually use "weird" and "normal" in a way that suggests weird is bad and normal is good.

Until you drop that judgment you will never be happy because by the standards of this world, you are weird because you are aspie.

NT behavior is no more or no less complex than aspie behavior. It is more common. Can an NT mimic aspie any better than an aspie mimic NT?


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21 Feb 2011, 3:21 pm

wavefreak58 wrote:
You continually use "weird" and "normal" in a way that suggests weird is bad and normal is good.

Until you drop that judgment you will never be happy because by the standards of this world, you are weird because you are aspie.

NT behavior is no more or no less complex than aspie behavior. It is more common. Can an NT mimic aspie any better than an aspie mimic NT?


I do agree with Wavefreak here Jamesy you seem to have a downer on yourself, or on us in general? We are just different.

I also agree that NT behaviour is actually impossible to emulate because it is too complex. Life isn't a script. There are far too many people out there who think all you have to do is this, and then that. I know someone who says the first step to not being autistic
is to teach people to stop rocking and saying "urgggh". When I ask him "why?" he has no answer.

I know someone else who has spent many decades formulating theories plans and systems for mimicking NT behaviour, although
she doesn't know she has aspie traits. She doesn't know it's unusual and "not-NT" to even think like this. I find it scary how close she has got, without ever actually arriving. In effect, I feel she is an accident waiting to happen :(


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Jamesy
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21 Feb 2011, 4:31 pm

Sorry guys it just that i am in my early 20's and mixed up about a lot of things in my life and having to deal with being aspie is not making things any easier. Come on i know its probably easier for you guys but everyone has different levels of coping with things.



wavefreak58
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21 Feb 2011, 5:13 pm

Jamesy wrote:
Sorry guys it just that i am in my early 20's and mixed up about a lot of things in my life and having to deal with being aspie is not making things any easier. Come on i know its probably easier for you guys but everyone has different levels of coping with things.


Don't apologize.

How do you figure it's any easier? I'm 52 and just found out I'm on the spectrum. Add 30 years to what your experiencing right now - 30 years WITHOUT knowing what it is or how to begin resolving it.

You are 30 years ahead of me. You should feel pretty good about that. Not that that makes it easy.


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Digsy
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21 Feb 2011, 5:24 pm

Jamesy wrote:
Sorry guys it just that i am in my early 20's and mixed up about a lot of things in my life and having to deal with being aspie is not making things any easier. Come on i know its probably easier for you guys but everyone has different levels of coping with things.


Think yourself lucky you haven't had another 13 years of not knowing why you don't quite fit into any cirlces and always wondering what was wrong with you.
If I had learned as much as I have this past week back when I was your age, I would have made many many choices differently and could have had more positive outcomes to events that turned sour.

It takes me a whole lot to explode and right before I do I press my palms together as hard as I can, bite my tongue and then boom I'm off and God help anyone in my way.
I had no idea that pressing my palms together and biting my tongue was stimming, no more than the tapping of fingers when running impatient, pacing about whilst contemplating.

I had a strict p.e. teacher who would make me run a whole length of the field if he caught me walking with my feet pointing inwards, I ran that field many times, and it took my years to correct myself when walking.
Things like this I look back on and think bloody nora, there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for it, and could you imagine if a teacher made someone who couldn't hear run a lap for not listening.



Last edited by Digsy on 21 Feb 2011, 5:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Jamesy
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21 Feb 2011, 5:30 pm

WOW wavefreak your 52? I thought you were not much older than me :)



wavefreak58
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21 Feb 2011, 5:53 pm

Jamesy wrote:
WOW wavefreak your 52? I thought you were not much older than me :)


I'm so old my farts have farts 8O


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21 Feb 2011, 7:53 pm

I'm 59, and I really wish I knew what I started learning about AS 2 years ago when I needed it the most - as I reached 10 years old.
You have the advantage here - don't knock it! :lol:


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21 Feb 2011, 7:56 pm

Image



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21 Feb 2011, 8:01 pm

Weird is interesting and normal is just a bit too common for my liking.


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Jamesy
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21 Feb 2011, 8:47 pm

Well even if your weird youself when observing somebody with aspergers you think "Wow he is acting strikingly out of the ordinary comapred to nearly everbody in the enviorment". What I am saying is that it is near impossible to see how different you behave unless someone records you without you knowing then it becomes strikingly obvious how out of the norm you behave.

Not all is what it seems and you would think switching from weird (aspergers) to NT (normal) would be simple when observed but like I said it is A LOT harder than it looks. I am sure many NT people think "Why can't people with Aspergers copy how other people behave around them and become normal". Even when we behave very oddly we just don't realasie and are blind to how out of place our mannerisims are compared to non autistic people. I think a lot of the time as well NTs out of politeness and even fear will not tell us how weird we are acting but at the same time we do get told 'often' that we are ecentric.

Can I add as well that the part of the human brain which controls 'behaviour' is dysfuncitonal in an autistic persons brain. Likewise part of the brain which controls 'thought' is also dysfuncitonal in an aspie brain. that is we get so many random/intrusive thoughts that NTs can control better than us. NT people have like an auto pilote mode system in thier brians which can make them just drift through life a lot easier than aspies can.

Sorry i offended anyone with saying AS is weird etc.....