100 Social Situations You've Screwed Up In

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I'll start the first one.

1. I was the new kid in the fourth grade. I made four friends. My mom said another girl was trying to be my friend. However, I barely noticed her attempts. My screw-up: I failed to notice when someone was trying to be my friend.

2) Saying after my wedding as I was opening up our wedding presents, "they may be cheap but at least they weren't cheap enough to not get us a wedding present" after I opened my aunt and uncle's gift including cousin's and everyone laughed. Then I said it in the thank you card to them.

3) After we moved to Montana when I was 13, I give out my phone number to kids trying to make new friends

4) When I was 17 I was attempting to get a boyfriend so I ask this cute guy in my class if he wants to be my boyfriend and he kept saying he was too old for me, so I finally told him I wasn't after sex and I don't want it

5. I had a crush on a student-teacher. On the last day of class, I told him I loved him, having never spoken to him outside of answering a couple questions in class. I guess... that was pretty creepy.

6. I found the traces of a friend's failed project online. I knew he had talked about it enthusiastically and brought it up again, and he thought I was trying to mock his failure.

7. I twice related an embarrassing anecdote about a person to that person.

8. While working at a health food store, a woman confided in me that she had cancer, and my immediate spoken response was "Oh, that sucks."

9. My niece picked a fight with someone who was staying here. I stopped to talk to the person staying here (because I believed my niece was in the wrong - and she was) but didn't think to talk to my niece because, whatever I thought, she's still my niece, right? Oops. Definitely hurt feelings there.

10. I once made a mistake that I knew was a mistake at the time. A year later I apologized to the person who was hurt, but I managed to mangle the apology enough to make things worse because I had misunderstood what was possibly a blatant hint.

Just a few.

11. At an autism conference; parents had to point out that a guy had been checking me out for anywhere from a half hour-3 hours or so (no idea)

12. Watching porn with friends, mistakenly think one of them is actually masturbating next to me (he was faking)...

13. The 50,000+ times I've misunderstood sarcasm

14. Giving away too much personal info (I do this a lot...)

15. Sniffing shoes in a Nordstrom (really fancy store)... or any other shoe store for that matter

16. Basically screaming that I've had contact w/ every bodily fluid besides blood, semen & vaginal secretions in a college dining hall

17. Picking stuff off my brother's head in public

18. Interrupting conversations

19. Talking about foot fetishes, vomit and diarrhea with friends at dinner (don't ask why it came up... we're usually gross)

20. Talking about what I was going to do on vacation with a stranger when I was about 5

21. After a live action RP session, talking to other participants about killing someone else's character, loudly, in a convenience store, while wearing leather and sunglasses.

22. When I was in 7th grade and went to a school dance, one of the boys asked me to dance (which just didn't happen!). I was really happy to be noticed by anyone. We did and it was fine. But after that, I couldn't bring myself to say anything to him for upwards of about a year. I'd just freeze up. I didn't even really like the boy or find him cute, but I just had no idea what to say to him. Poor guy probably thought he'd done something wrong.

23. I broke into laughter during my self-defense class after the teacher had just spoken about armed break-ins and murder and other nasty stuff. I don't even remember what I found so funny, but it was definitely inappropriate.

24. Botching up greetings or goodbyes. There have been countless times when I've told someone "good morning" in the afternoon or later (even when I've been up for hours). Or have said things like "have fun!" when they tell me they're going to a funeral or some other not so happy event.

I know there are others, but let's stick with these for now...

25. In graduate school, I was moving to another graduate school. On my last day, someone in my D&D group bought a coconut as a as a farewell gift. I told him that I hated coconut.

26. At my first week in a new job: They had a weekly get together over beer. Since I didn't drink beer, someone brought in a coke for me. I said that I wasn't thirsty.

27. There was a young woman that I was attracted to. We went out once. After that, I kept on calling her, and she was always busy. It took a lot of failed attempts before I understood that she simply was not interested in me.

28. My secretary left me alone with an attractive young woman. She said that the young woman wanted to know a little about the college she was going to. My secretary then left. I told the young woman about the college and then left. It was only later that I realized that I missed a great opportunity. I think that my secretary was setting us up.

That's enough for now.

30. When I was about 8 or 9 (too young to be excused) I said loudly to my mom in her sports club changing room that a women beside me was "so big". When my mom did not give me a verbal response I said even louder "mummy, she's so big". This would have been pretty bad anyways but then the women explained that she had just had a baby

31. When I was interested in ages (which grew out of an interest in numbers) going up to my mom's friends every time I saw them and repeatedly asking how old they were ......despite having been reprimanded and told not to do this several times.

32. Throwing out other kids lunches in the school lunch room when they did not have a cream cheese and jelly sandwich...since that was the only sandwich I ate and I would throw away my lunch if I didn't have this sandwich....I assumed the other children would also not want to eat anything else because I didn't (I got in a lot of trouble for this one)

34. At age 13 while sitting in a corner by myself at a school dance a boy kept coming up to me and putting out his hand as a gesture to get me to dance....I tried shaking his hand, he made another gesture and stretched his hand out to me again….. I just stared at him blankly for several minutes and then he started laughing and walked away

35. I allowed some popular girls in grade 8 to give me a "makeover" and then believed them when they said I looked "really cool" even when everyone else was laughing and did not wipe off the enormous quantity of make-up they had smeared on my face to make me look ridiculous as a joke (finally a nice shy girl came up to me and told me that they were making fun of me)

36. When I was 2 my parents, newborn sister and I were at someone else's house for a large social gathering of some sort. It seems I didn't like that because I walked up to my mom and sister while she was nursing her and in one swift motion ripped out all of my sister's hair.

37. When I was 4 or 5 we were all eating at a Wendy's. A rather large woman walked in the door with her family and I decided to yell as loud as I could: "Mommy, won't you tell me about that big, fat pig." My parents couldn't get us out fast enough.

38. God knows how many times I've screwed up the chance to ask a woman out who in hindsight I realized showed obvious interest in me.

39) I remember when I was seven, I saw my neighbor walking to the mailbox and I had just learned a new word, fat. I noticed she was fat and I had seen a real live fat person so I point out to my mother "look how fat she is" and she doesn't respond so thinking she didn't hear me, I kept saying it and then she and her started talking and then mom told me to go sit and on the stairs.

40) I remember when i was eight I had learned another new word, duh. So I had noticed how the word is used and my best friend would say that word at the end of her sentences when we argue so one day in the kitchen I had an argument with my mother and I said "duh" at the end and she told me to go sit on the stairs.

41) When I was little, I over heard mom talking to my dad about one of our neighbors and she said she isn't like them and one day I saw her talking to the neighbor and I said to her "Mom why are you talking to her, you said you don't like her?" The woman got wide eyes and walked away even though mom tried apologizing but she ignored her and never spoke to her again nor invite her and us to her parties.

42. My mother once said in my hearing that my paternal grandmother's lemon meringue pie tasted like burnt rubber. So I repeated this to my paternal grandmother. Apparently, hilarity ensued. I was 5 or 6 at the time.

43. I could fill 100 pages with all of my screw ups, but I'll just put my latest.

I was walking into walmart the other night and there were two cute girls standing by the door, they noticed my hair and tried to call me over to talk to them, instead of stopping and and saying hi, I looked at them, panicked slightly, nodded at them (NODDED? really?) and rushed into the store. when I started to leave I noticed they were still out there, so I went out the far end of the store and ALL the way around to parking lot back to my car.... not my best moment.

I posted these recently on other threads, but they are appropriate.

43. My grandmother was pleased that I was almost as tall as she was. I replied that many of the kids in my class were taller than her. I did not realize that she was commenting on my height, and she was completely uninterested in the heights of my classmates.

44. Our school did not have a prom, we had a banquet. I skipped the banquet because I was too shy to ask anybody out and because the whole social get together made me uncomfortable. After the banquet, a girl said that she would have gone with me to the banquet. I replied. "Oh," taking it as a piece of factual information. It was only much later that I realized that I could have, and should have just asked her out at that time, or even later.