Has this ever happened to you.

Post Reply New Topic

Today my boss was trying to give me a complex set of dirrections over the phone.It was not working and both of us were getting frustrated.Finaly he said never mind I'll just send you a fax and you can figure it out by yourself. I truly did not understand what he wanted till I saw it in writing.
When I recieved the fax I read it and instantly the conversation made since. I did not think that the request was that difficult and finished it in about 30 min. and faxed the results back to my boss.
Over 2 hrs later he called me back and asked if I understood his fax and did I think I could get the information he needed before noon tommorrow. When I told him that it was already done and on his machine he told me that I obviously did not understand he request and that he hoped & wished I would get it together and just do what he asked!! !! !!
I was so made that I had to leave the office for a few mins. Before I got back in the office he called me on my cell phone and said that yes that was exactly what he was looking for but why hadden I made the type bigger.
Then he told me that if I could finish this project so quickly that I should have understood his verbal request easily and saved him the time it took to write it out and that obviously something was not right in my brain.
He really did not understand that I could not comprehend what he wanted unitl I saw it and I could not understand why he made such a easy task sound like it would take days to complete.

What I wanted to ask was have you ever not understood a set of verbal instructions or a physical demo only to later read the same information and understand it completely?

definitly! For some reason, people like to make things complex in dialogue form and it just doesnt make any sense. This happens all the time, especially with the therapists I've seen. They'd say this disorder or that one fit and why and i'd just have to shake my head an nod until I could go back later and read it for myself to understand and dispute the claim.

All the time.

My mother tried for years to teach me how to crochet...I could never get past making a simple chain. I bought a book at a yardsale and made my first afghan in a week.

When someone tells me how to do something I tend to get confused...almost like I'll hear the first sentence or two and then my brain goes into overload....if I can read directions I usually don't have a problem.

This is definately an issue for me as well. People often make things sound complicated, or to me anyway. As soon as I see it done, or see it in some way, I can usually do it just fine.

Some people are terrible at giving verbal instructions. If that person happens to be a boss they might not have ever received feedback from underlings to know that they are terrible at giving verbal instructions.

I've learned not to blame the boss though, and to always ask for instructions in writing. This is because I know I cannot follow verbal instructions very well. I have CAPD, or Central Auditory Processing Disorder. This is co-morbid with my AS. I think that I hear what the person has said when I am given sequential instructions, but in fact my inner ear does not process the sound in the normal way. I think of it as dyslexia of the ears. It's only a problem when I have to follow precise sequential instructions given in verbal form. I've learned to tell people that I have CAPD, and ask for written instructionns rather than watch or listen to them become more and more frustrated when I can't follow their verbal instructions.

Another symptom of CAPD is abnormally sensitive hearing, so that a person can hear sounds others might not, even though there are also these deficits, such as inability to follow verbal or rhythmic sequences.

It used to happen to me quite a bit at my old job. My boss would give me instructions to do something, and I often found myself asking for clarification over and over again. Although he wasn't pleased with it, he did accomodate me by sending me most instructions via e-mail, unless it was something simple, like "make the heading Arial instead of Times New Roman".

Just tell him you're eye oriented rather than ear oriented, and find instructions easier when you get them visually.

I'm going to suggest you read up on the Satir modes: he's auditory and you're visual. Suzette Haden Elgin has some wonderful books out and at least one of them - probably several more - deal with workplace problems like this.

One point she makes repeatedly: if an auditory person says "Are you listening?" and you answer back "I see," the other person hears that as a "not really." If you say "I hear you," they understand.

Yes, some of us are very "visual." If I don't have something to look at or read I'm hopeless. A similar thing has happened between my boss and me several times. And at work they like to wave written instructions around so I have to ask them to either hand them to me or let me photocopy the stuff.
I guess most people understand the spoken word better than I do.

CAPD is apparently a common cormobid disorder to AS. This might be what you have:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Auditory_processing_disorder

Alternatively it could be a lack of short term working memory (different to short term wrote memory), despite having plenty of everything else.

Never. I have understood complete intructions without having to figure it out on my own.

I do have some trouble follow verbal intrustions, especially if they're not step by step, i find it much easier to follow written instructions or do something after I've seen how it works y watching someone else so it. If someone is trying to explain something to me verbally i have to ask lots of questions to clarify exactly what i'm supposed to be doing. I find it really hard to do things sometimes without a set of specific instructions.
It is interesting that flat pack furniture, one of the things i find really fun to deal with, is all about following written instructions and bad drawings and is one the things that drives most people i know completely round the bend.

many aspies/autistics are visual learners and this causes a disadvantage in many work-related situations. i have found it helpful to keep a small notepad in the event that i must take verbal instructions. for example, i have a difficult time understanding people when i ask for directions to a location. although i am very good with spatial directions and maps, i generally prefer they simply give me their address and let me figure it out on my own (i keep several road maps in my car). otherwise, i can at least jot down their directions on my pad. once i SEE the directions written down or have looked at a map, i have little difficulty finding my way.

Oh, yes!

Sometimes, expressing things through writing is good. That way, you can hear the person talking to you in your head.

For example, if I have something coming up in the future, I feel fine if it is expressed in writing. I do not always remember verbal reminders.

Some people are not as patient when it comes to this. However, I hope things improve with you before we know it.

My problem with verbal instructions isn't necessarily that I can't understand them but that I forget them immediately after hearing them if they are complex. This makes life somewhat difficult when cleaning time comes round and my mom tries to give me a list of tasks.

Ryebot, the notepad thing is a good idea. I think I'll start doing that more.

Like in my taxi if im given each job a couple of minutes before i get behind and tempers fly but give me a list as and when the bookings come in then i can get on with it and get the job done, simple ! !

I don't do well with verbal instructions, but I always figured it was because I don't pay attention.

Another way to look at it is that listening is a passive task, while reading is a more active task. If you're restless like me, you'd prefer reading instructions rather than standing and listening to them.