The great silly stereotype shattering statement let-loose!!

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For those who have seen my recent posts, I usually entertain serious discussion on AS, so I'm taking a diversion from that...and incidentally this stimulates flexible thinking what I've got below are some stereotype shattering statements for us Aspies...which should give you a good, hearty laugh - ah, the magic of self-deprecating humour. (feel free to add to the list.) Here goes:

#1) NO, I do not speak Klingon.

#2) NO, I do not paint my action figures on a Saturday night nor do I have an impressive collection of them.

#3) NO, I do not bike to work in a suit.

#4) NO, I do not talk to people for 10 minutes straight on the history of washing machines (nor do I have any interest in learning about the history of washing machines myself)

#5) NO, I do not obsess over the odds of some calamity occurring like the way C3PO does (and btw, I also haven't seen "Empire" 53 times...I'll have you know I've only seen it 17 times, thank you very much)

#6) NO, I do not go to a job interview in a 70s suit, and then put my oversized briefcase on the interviewer's desk after he asks me to take a seat.

#7) NO, I have never been to a comic book convention.

#8) NO, I do not talk to people 8 inches away from them after I haven't showered or brushed my teeth for 2 days.

#9) NO, I am not the President of the ICC (involuntary celibacy society).

#10) NO, I did not camp outside the theatre dressed as Gandalf for the sneak preview of Lord of the Rings.

#11) No I am no into Japanese or any other tip of anime

#12) Yes, I know how to hold a pretty normal conversation

#13) No, I am not a boy (have you ever seen the autism ads from autism speaks, there are girls with AS too!! !!)

#14) No, I don't wash my hands obsessively, just because I have AS and OCD mean I have the same exact symptoms

NO, I do not have weird obsessions, I have socially acceptable ones

NO, I do not have every current videogame system; I decided not to buy a 3DS

NO I will not make out with you! Did you hear that? This girl wants to make out with me in the middle of class. You got Chlorophyll Man up there talking about God knows what and all she can talk about is making out with me. I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you. Go ON with the chlorophyll!

NO, I am not afraid of rollercoasters, concerts and parties

...okay, well I'm afraid of parties, but I still go

#18: No, I can not count the exact number of toothpicks dropped on the ground within a fraction of a second.

And no, obviously I can't count lol. That was 19. Sorry

20. No, I do not go on about the fact that I buy my underwear at K-Mart.

21. NO, I do not need a cure.

22. NO, I am not interested in computers... only what I do with them.

23. NO, I do not throw tantrums for no reason or for some sensory or other overly simple reason.

24. No, I am not good with computers
25. No, I do not really like video games
26. Yes, I can dance and do basic tumbling
27. Yes, I do have friends
28. I do have good hygiene
29. No, I do not hurt myself all the time and bang my head into a wall
30. Yes, I have met people who are creepier and more awkward than myself who are NOT autistic
31. Yes, I can make eye contact
32. Yes, I can coordinate nice outfits or generally dress well (when I feel like it )
33. No, I am NOT good at math

34. Yes, I am capable of feeling things, even though I may not understand what you are feeling right now.
35. No, I am not smarter than you because of my AS. I am smarter than you because my parents are smart.
36. Yes, I have hair on my legs. Seriously, what the hell?
37. Yes, I hate the bands you like.
38. No, I will not answer any more of your stupid questions.