How to talk about money without talking about ssi

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rastachucker
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10 Apr 2011, 2:32 pm

First let me apologize if this is not the right place for this I did not know where the heck to put this question. If it needs to move by all means move it but please do not erase it.

Here is the deal I am on Craig's list looking for a place to live and I tried to avoid the roommate thing because I am on SSI and people usually want someone who is working. Usually when I tell them I am on SSI that is a show stopper and that ends the conversation and the possible home. Also I feel like telling people I am on SSI is kind of like saying I get welfare and leads to the questions about my how are you disabled and other questions I would like to avoid on first contact with someone new. So I thought that I would put it here to find out how other people have handled the money question when looking for a roommate online or other places when on SSI. Also if it needs to come out that your on SSI how do you handle the questions that come after that for example how are you disabled and what not. Thank you in advance.



sgrannel
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10 Apr 2011, 5:57 pm

Why are people making decisions based on your source of money? If you must prove income, then this is something you show to the landlord and not the roommates. Roommates shouldn't even need to know that you have an income, let alone how much or from what source. Just don't tell anyone that you get SSI unless it's the landlord and he is requiring you to prove that you have income, and are thus able to pay your portion of the rent.

Why would roommates be concerned that you have a job? Do they want you gone for part of the day for some reason? Not having a job doesn't mean that you must stay in the room all day. Could their concern about SSI be rooted in the possibility that an SSI recipient could be physically disabled, and thus require specialized facilities that are not present? If you're obviously not physically disabled, and not blind, then others may think you receive SSI because of any number of mental health issues that they may be afraid of even if the fear isn't justified.


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the_curmudge
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10 Apr 2011, 7:48 pm

What you have is passive income, money you get for being you, rather than working at a job. It could come from sources that anyone would find perfectly blameless: trust distibutions, stock and bond dividends, timeshare rental income, or royalty payments, to name a few, so don't be too quick to be specific. What people really want to know is that you have money of your own coming in every month. You might fend off any premature inquiries by stating, " I have the income to afford this place; I'll show you the details if I decide to take it." You're not a beggar, they have to prove themselves to you first. The SSI revelation should be less of a problem if the landlord has already seen you handle a business transaction competently and decided you're The One.



rastachucker
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11 Apr 2011, 8:28 pm

Thank you very much for your responses. I have just found that when looking more than just income the want to make sure that I am not going to be sitting around the house. I like the part of being a passive income but it seems like when I vague about the source of my income they become concern about why I unwilling to tell them. Then I feel almost obligated to reveal where the income comes from. I have tried not to bring it up on many different phone calls with many possible roomies never worked out quite well for me. If it was just a landlord and I could prove that I could pay rent then they don't care it but it different when I looking to room in someone's home.



azurecrayon
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11 Apr 2011, 10:24 pm

roommates want to know that you have a job, or at least an income, because if you stop paying the rent then they will be left holding the bag. they are just protecting themselves if they ask about your income. if they get nosy as to why, you can always tell them you have a guaranteed stipend every month due to a previous injury.

landlords want to know about income for obvious reasons, however they are generally not allowed to ask any questions or require information concerning medical or mental health. so they can ask the source of your money but shouldnt be asking how you are disabled.

sometimes landlords dont want to rent to those on ssi or similar programs because you are whats called "uncollectable." that means your ssi income is protected, it cant be garnished, so if they had to evict you or take you to court and got a money judgement, they couldnt get your income garnished to collect on the judgement. it puts landlords in an uncomfortably tenuous position financially.

i manage an apartment complex and do get a lot of people on ssi. quite often those on ssi are on it because of mental health reasons that dont lend themselves to living in an apartment community. sometimes it works out fine, other times theyve gone off their meds and become a menace to me or their neighbors. i have had to evict more than a few for anti-social behaviors (yelling at people, threatening, continual noise disturbances, etc). if someone were to volunteer to me that they are on ssi for anxiety or autism, that would be a relief. otherwise, any time you get someone on ssi, you never know how it will turn out.


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12 Apr 2011, 12:14 am

Whoa, wait a minute, my in laws are on SSI and have no jobs but they are still getting garnished because my FIL screwed up on his taxes.

@ OP
Lot of people make assumptions. I remember that one video I watched someone posted in the L&D and it was about a guy who had depression and he decided to go online and do an experiment. He would say he had a mental health problem and lot of people would stop taking to him. They were no longer interested it him. His whole point was lot of people jump to a conclusion and assume the worst. Perhaps that is what they are doing about your SSI. Assuming the worst. Being on SSI means you have something wrong with you and they assume the worst like are you crazy? But it's good people are asking you questions than assuming the worst.



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12 Apr 2011, 2:08 am

It's also possible that they assume that you will not do your fair share of housework, don't take care of the place or have poor personal hygiene. Let's be fair, a lot of autistic people do have those problems. They don't wash up dishes or pots after cooking right away, they leave dirty clothes on the floor, they leave food crumbs on the table or floor, they don't shower for days at a time if they don't need to go out for anything, sometimes they have different sleep patterns and require quietness during the day and stay up all night...etc. My entire family (other than my mother who's NT) do some or all of that, but we don't live with roommates.

Since you're on SSI, would it be possible for you to apply for subsidized housing? If you can find a bachelor's unit or something it won't cost much more than renting a room, but then you don't have to worry about roommates. I used to rent a very small bachelor apartment in my 20s. At that time it was only $50 more than renting a room in a house. I was very happy about it. It was so small I had to store my dresser in the bathroom. And the stove only had one burner and the fridge stored no more than two days' food. All those had perks for an autistic person, though. My stuff was minimal and well organized. I could always find everything. I went out for walks regularly to buy food. I never ate stale old food. I saved lots of money on impulse purchase as I would have nowhere to put the stuff. And no annoying friends come to sleep on my couch, as I didn't have the room for a couch. :D I still miss those years.



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12 Apr 2011, 7:45 am

My take...being honest, but not trying to be unfair.

In the NT world, there is a long list of horror stories of renting to people getting government money. Because they don't "work" for what they get, they often don't respect what they have. Many abuse their living space, strip stuff out, let stuff fall into disrepair, don't clean up their mess, etc. Landlords that take "Section 8" housing often would rather have people paying the market rate rather than rent to welfare recipients.

More so, renting to someone on a government check often means there are limitations on what rights a landlord has....often making renting to such a person even more unattractive.

Now, you're talking about a roommate, and I don't know if the laws would impact a roommate as it would a landlord, and perhaps the landlord has restrictions on who can share in a place (most roommates splitting the rent must get landlord approval to consummate the deal).

Nonetheless, you are on "welfare," and welfare recipients (as a group) have a bad reputation. If you've lived elsewhere and can produce a list of references who will tell prospective roommates/landlords that you were a good tenant, it might help.



Whisper
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12 Apr 2011, 8:19 am

the_curmudge wrote:
I have the income to afford this place; I'll show you the details if I decide to take it."


Not the OP, but in a similar situation soon. This strikes me as good advice, thankyou.



Silverbutterfly
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12 Apr 2011, 9:59 am

What if you just say you get monthly money from a trust fund and right now instead of working you choose to spend your time doing other things.



rastachucker
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19 Apr 2011, 12:44 pm

Wow!! Thanks You Guys. I love this website.
I tried the I living off investments and people thought I was telling them I was broke. May be it was that particular person because she spoke broken English. I know like you said about the guy who suffer from depression and told people he had mental health problems they assumed he was like a hard core nut when he was depressed. I remember I was living in house with these christian guys and we got this new roommate who was going to seminary to become a pastor and we once had a little tiff over him turning on the heater for whole house and I had told him of my aspies and he a week later told me that he had become head resident and that I had to move out because he wanted to fill the house and he could not with people like me living there. When pressed why he was asking me to leave it was because he had told everyone that I was delusional and crazy even the landlord. I did not know my rights so I left but I have learn since then that if you live some place longer than thirty days even in something as loose as a roommate situation might be if they want you gone they have to officially evict you they cannot just ask you to go.