Aspie males and the NT male "code of honor" issue

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A thought to entertain amongst you...insightful folks that you are.

I'm an Aspie guy in my 30s and have noticed, as some of you have, that in the period of late teens to mid-20s, NT guys are big on the "code of honour" when it comes to being ridiculed in front of peers, especially in front of a female prospect or gf...the unwritten rule is that you must get into a phys. altercation w/ the offender to recoup your dignity. I always found this a regrettable irony, that Aspies like us are the ones most likely to elicit this sort of behaviour during the 18-26 age, but the ones least likely to deal with it effectively. With motor skill deficits, the prospect of physically reacting to a tormentor never really appealed to me, I would just say they don't know what they're talking about, they're drunk, I'm not getting into this...and walk away. The way I see it, it could end up with either a) me in the hospital with a broken jaw or possibly wondering if I'll walk again (think about the falling on the stool scene from Million Dollar Baby), or b) I get sent to jail for a few years for aggravated assault or manslaughter (what if the guy hits his head on the floor from a sucker-punch??) so I think we show more restraint than the typical NT male in this demographic, I say to hell with the code of honor, I'm already in "violation" of other unwritten social rules unknowingly, so if I violate the code of honour knowingly, let them think what they want...and I'll be a heck of a lot better off walking away with lowered dignity, than I would be in a jail full of psychos with their own "code of honor", or having to rehabilitate with a 2nd disability after waking up in hospital with a migraine not remembering what happened.

Maybe the code of honour comes from the young NT males thinking that they are not robbed of the faculties that us Aspies are, so they feel they don't have anything to risk or lose??? Who knows, I don't get it, never did!! !

"Maybe the code of honour comes from the young NT males thinking that they are not robbed of the faculties that us Aspies are, so they feel they don't have anything to risk or lose??? "

I like this quote! It's like they don't care if they end up in jail, or the hospital, with a bashed in brain, because they don't have much of a brain to bash in...
this is clever

I'm not sure what you mean. Most guys, even the NT's, aren't really into physical confrontation. In my experience it is only a small minority who are. For this small minority the reasons are nothing whatsoever to do with any "code of honour".

the last thing most guys want to do is get into a fight

a lot of guys talk a lot of s**t to intimidate, at the end of the day that's all they do, talk

It's primate dominance behaviour. If only we settled conflicts more like bonobos than gorillas.

It sounds like you have been unfortunate enough to be surrounded by jerks.

Odd, I've never heard of that particular rule, I'm well aware of "guy code", but I've never seen anyone get into a fight because they got teased.... seems like they are insecure about something, or jerks.

Well, at the age of 25, I was lucky to have my first girlfriend...only lasted a few months, but we went to a nightclub together (bad idea - my deficient street smarts didn't alert me to it) and some guy started coming on to her, but I wasn't picking up on the fact, she pulled my sleeve and whispered to me, so I just said let's walk over somewhere else...no way was I going to get into a confrontation. She criticized me for not "being aware" of her needs and what was going on, and this was 2 years before my diagnosis so I just told her that I had "some form of ADHD" the doc said I had...which she barely accepted...so I was the one who ended up severing the ties, too much drama from her that overloaded me. But the point is, I didn't believe in any kind of chivalry that would put myself at risk, let them think of me what they will, I won't see those guys again - and if she judges, that's her problem.