Unable to get a girlfriend

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I am 45yrs old and have never had a girlfriend or sex and am discusted with myself. I had a horrible rejection experience when I was 19yrs old at college she was 16yrs and another at age 33yrs she was 28yrs. Now I have joined some dating sites and all I am getting are old boilers. I would like to meet someone in the late twenties or early thirties and cannot change this no matter what you say. When I was younger I was looking for women just a few years younger that myself. It is alright for woman to have toyboys. My neighbour is 12yrs older than his wife and my grandfather was 18yrs older. Catherine Zeta Jones is 25yrs younger than her husband. Very few woman have ever shown interest in me. Women don't see me as a sexual person but as someone to feel sorry for and to pity. The only reason I'm still alive is because of my parents but once they are gone i'll go as well. You may say get help but I already have been through the NHS. All doctors can do is give me pills. They think that I am expecting them to write out a prescription for a woman. The aspergers group I go to can't help with this and I would'nt expect them to be a dating agency. I once had a good job but due to government cuts I had a breakdown afterwards and am now on benefits so have'nt got a hope in hell off getting a woman but perhaps a dragon.

Don't give up man! There are tons of places to meet woman (join a club, library, coffeeshops) What do you think is stopping you from getting a GF? If you really wanted one I believe you can do it.

I can see how this would be pretty tough with no job and you wanting a young woman. Have you considered rescuing a woman from poverty from a third world country? Services for that sort of thing are expensive, you'd probably have to do the legwork yourself.

I consider myself a ladies man and my relationships with women are great until I put my foot in my mouth. For me oriental women are a lot more patient with me and being an American citizen gives me the automatic status of a millionaire.

Yes i've joined clubs in the past and I go to the library but trying to start a conversation with a woman. They are there for a book and don't want a male pestering them. It would seem very weird and they would run a mile. I have contemplated a foreign woman and even emailed a woman through a foreign dating agency. The Russian woman I spoke to lost interest after a while but I persisted and she started to email me again. I asked the wrong questions and she end up calling me a dole scrounger who could only get a black woman. Most of the woman on these sites put there profiles on them because they are curious. Some are after millionaires, some are scammers. Do you really think they want to leave their families and countries for some stranger. The cost of travelling back and forth to court a foreign woman, cost of hotels and travel is at least £20,000. If you marry them they won't be covered by the NHS and theres all the problems of getting them in the country. Women didn't like me when I was younger. There are alot of woman in there 40s and 50s who are divorsed and desperate for a man. When they were young they should have gone for the dorky boy who is good at science but has no friends, accept him for what he is and his AS .They would still probably be married. The problem is that theres to much ignorance. Women can see whats in front of their eyes.

Well, Russia isn't exactly third world. I was thinking more Asia, Middle-East, Africa or South America. You could meet a very nice white-looking Indian girl maybe. Or I knew a guy who married a gorgeous Iranian girl, everyone thought she was Italian.

You can't just ask out two people and get a date. Most guys ask out heaps, some even hundreds. Got to pick yourself up after each rejection and keep going.

You're pushing your luck even more trying to get someone that much younger at your age and being aspergers.

Women don't see you as there because you don't put yourself out there. Asking out two people in a life span is not putting yourself out there. Stop blaming others and get out there.

Uh.... logic check.

When you were young and full of promise the younger women (the ones your age) did not want you then.

Now you are old and on benefits (perhaps showing some signs of wear and tear) and the only women you will consider is these same 20 year olds who would not have you when you were younger and full of promise.



Uh... Okay. That's realistic....

Make sure you stick your idea that all of the women over 40 are washed up and fuddy and useless to you that death is a better option. (going by the fact that you intend to take yourself out once your parents go if you cannot find a soman) Boggles the mind...

I don't know where to start...
Women are people, you know. You might have better luck if you started treating them as such, rather than as trophies. You complain about them not accepting you for who you are and then automatically discount anyone within a decade of your age?
Surely you have interests? Go out and pursue those, meet people who have things in common with you.

I think you've got very reasonable and wise advises here. My case: First and only relationship at age 36, ended a year later. The discovery of AS in myself had a temporary setback affect, but now I'm resuming my quest for a mate. Do the same. With every try you get more knowledge on the subject, without trying you will get nothing. And, try to understand the loved one, have compromises (give-and-take), listen to her needs, define and defend yourself at the same time. A relationship requires constant input from both parties.

Consider means such as marriage brokers and like, too, besides internet dating portals.

Alot of you out there have got me all wrong. I don't consider woman as trophies especially as I had not had any. I have a right to have a younger woman as much as a right for a woman to have a toyboy. I am not asking for a woman in her early twenties or late teens as some of you have emplied. They are far to imature. Women did not like me when I was younger because they prefered someone like the leader of the gang type or someone abit criminal. If I went for an older woman there is'nt the option of having children and more of a risk of conditions like downs sydrome. I know there are some very angry older woman who can't get a man because of the very similar reasons. This is because when they were younger they made the wrong decision and gone for abit of rough When they should have gone for the quiet dork. I have been out there. I've joined clubs such as karate and I go to the gym. That older woman does'nt know what shes talking about. She has'nt lead a life like mine and probably has had plenty of partners. I can change my views or what I am. I know there are alot of men out there with younger wifes e'g my neighbours wife is 12yrs younger. It works both ways.

I won't mind meeting a lady who is from South America, asia or iran who does'nt see an age gap relationship as a problem and is not highly religious. The problem is putting this into practice and the high costs. I was talking to a very attractive 28yr old Egyptian woman a few years ago who was fasinated that I like to keep things tidy but it faded out.

A younger woman who wants an older man to start a family with really will be expecting a good provider. That's the younger woman/older man usual dynamic. So you need to get a job. Easier said than done, I know, but it is a mandatory prerequisite if you are unwilling to consider older, self supporting women who are looking for an age peer.