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Different Perception of "Time" -

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abyssquick
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14 May 2011, 9:49 pm

I have noticed I seem to have a different perception of "time" in many circumstances. This has been apparent in my interactions with people I haven't seen/talked to for awhile, especially if I was comfortable around them in the past, or got to know them well. My mind seems to revert back to that area of familiarity, candor, and comfort, without realizing. From what I gather this level of comfort may not be appropriate to the circumstances (which do vary of course). It can be 5-10 years since any interaction, and it's almost as if the time passed doesn't matter, or somehow does not change the nature of whatever friendship or acquaintance-ship it was. I guess because there is a lack of emotional and social context. Is there anything to make of this? Anyone with similar experiences regarding "Time?"



Last edited by abyssquick on 14 May 2011, 9:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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14 May 2011, 9:54 pm

Most people are too hateful to be able to do that, meaning that they hold sort of a grudge for not having seen you for such a long time, or they are too afraid that you might be different than last time, and since most people are that way, you accepting them is too weird.



abyssquick
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14 May 2011, 9:56 pm

Mindslave wrote:
Most people are too hateful to be able to do that, meaning that they hold sort of a grudge for not having seen you for such a long time, or they are too afraid that you might be different than last time, and since most people are that way, you accepting them is too weird.


I have gathered there is some kind of "constant contact" protocol which I am usually oblivious to - I never know how to maintain any kind of friendship long-term.

I am also open to the possibility that this part is frozen in time. As in, social interactive parts have reached a certain capacity. My best friend from childhood is classical Autistic, and he seems very much 'frozen in time' developmentally. I imagine it is more difficult to see from the inside.



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14 May 2011, 10:30 pm

once a friend, always a friend, in my book.
i would rather err on the side of being "too friendly." if nothing else, it's a pleasant surprise.



abyssquick
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14 May 2011, 10:34 pm

emac wrote:
once a friend, always a friend, in my book.
i would rather err on the side of being "too friendly." if nothing else, it's a pleasant surprise.


Yep. Me too. I get the "too friendly" thing a lot. When I meet new people some wonder (out loud) why I talk to them like a good friend right off the bat. Must seem odd to some.



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15 May 2011, 12:40 am

abyssquick wrote:
I have noticed I seem to have a different perception of "time" in many circumstances. This has been apparent in my interactions with people I haven't seen/talked to for awhile, especially if I was comfortable around them in the past, or got to know them well. My mind seems to revert back to that area of familiarity, candor, and comfort, without realizing. From what I gather this level of comfort may not be appropriate to the circumstances (which do vary of course). It can be 5-10 years since any interaction, and it's almost as if the time passed doesn't matter, or somehow does not change the nature of whatever friendship or acquaintance-ship it was. I guess because there is a lack of emotional and social context. Is there anything to make of this? Anyone with similar experiences regarding "Time?"


My concept of time is as such.



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15 May 2011, 3:36 am

I do not know if this is what you are getting at, but I do loose time. Periods of time will go by in what seem mere seconds when, in fact, it was hours. The other times, the complete opposite. While I like regimen and love watches and clocks, I do not particularly care for time. It seems that far to much of a person's day is artificially broken by time. Yet, time itself is an artificial construct. Prometheus did not steal fire and a watch from Zeus. Perhaps time is not an emancipator but instead a burden -- we will all run out of time permanently at some point.


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Michael28
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15 May 2011, 7:03 am

abyssquick wrote:
It can be 5-10 years since any interaction, and it's almost as if the time passed doesn't matter, or somehow does not change the nature of whatever friendship or acquaintance-ship it was.


I had made many friends in Illinois, and decided to move to Florida for a little while for a change of scenery. I was gone for slightly over a year, and when I can back I visited my friends on both an individual and group basis to "catch up". One phrase that I heard repeated several times went something like: "It's great seeing you again, it's like it hasn't even been a day since you left.". I never really put much thought into it, but after reading through this post, perhaps I do the same without realizing it.


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15 May 2011, 10:54 am

This sounds exactly like me. I can remember the last conversation that I had with someone so clearly, that even if it has been months or years since we last spoke...it feels like it just happened. They may barely remember me!

In the past, I've been accused of flirting, when that isn't something that I ever do. I don't even know how, nor have I ever wanted to flirt. I've also been told that I speak to people like close friends, even if we are new aquaintances. Is that a common thing with AS?


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15 May 2011, 2:59 pm

mb1984 wrote:
I've also been told that I speak to people like close friends, even if we are new aquaintances. Is that a common thing with AS?


I do this - only recently have I learned that many people will collect information disseminated to them for the purposes of using against you later for social power.



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15 May 2011, 3:09 pm

I have to agree, that sounds exactly like me. I can pick right up where I left off... and then add up the years that it's been since I last was face to face with the person --- siblings even! and even I am shocked at how long it's been. The sibling's offspring were tiny babies last I saw them, now they've graduated school. Apparently that isn't how NT's relate, although I do note a lack of curiosity from them about me.... like they had written me off, or out of sight, out of mind... or... ? who knows how NT's think?

edited to add a missing 'e' -- and to clarify meaning



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16 May 2011, 2:17 am

abyssquick wrote:
I have noticed I seem to have a different perception of "time" in many circumstances. This has been apparent in my interactions with people I haven't seen/talked to for awhile, especially if I was comfortable around them in the past, or got to know them well. My mind seems to revert back to that area of familiarity, candor, and comfort, without realizing. From what I gather this level of comfort may not be appropriate to the circumstances (which do vary of course). It can be 5-10 years since any interaction, and it's almost as if the time passed doesn't matter, or somehow does not change the nature of whatever friendship or acquaintance-ship it was. I guess because there is a lack of emotional and social context. Is there anything to make of this? Anyone with similar experiences regarding "Time?"


I assume that the parts of memory responsible for holding "relationship" information are particularly strong for you. Most people will hold the emotional associations about people in their minds, but the synaptic strength tends to decrease over time, especially over a decade.