My proposal for a new wrongplanet rule

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I'm really tired of getting Ims from people asking for my phone number or if we can meet up. i'm not of age to make desicions like taht, and nor do i want to. I think that if we get that knd of im, or email we should report it.

That's a great idea! I'll edit my post on that constitution thread about the rules and put that in, if it's okay with the moderators.

Hmmm. Sensible advice on the internet is generally don't give out your contact details, particularly as a minor - you should be aware (everyone) that if your email and messenger details are listed with your posts they are visible to the general public as well as members of this site. If that makes you uncomfortable, don't do it.

As regards messages by PM, or messages via IM/email etc from other site members relating to contact made through WP, feel free to report conduct which makes you uncomfortable to a moderator and it will be dealt with. As far as I am concerned it is not permissible to harass other members, period - this already applies to PMs under the existing policy.

Dunc

This seems like very practical advice to me.

Thankyous.

I think if you provide your email or AIM to the site that people have the right to contact you.

You have a choice, not to provide it, and blocking a person on messenger.

I don't think think that PM's or anything that happens outside of this site should be used as evidence.

I don't think this deserves punishment.. people might see that you've provided an email and you want to be contacted.

I don't think any of us were talking about punishment for contacting others by email- I agree with you if people make their email and IM addy visible to others it sends a message that they are willing to be contacted.
Any warnings would only be sent if a person has been told they want them to stop contacting them and choose to ignore this wish. We're talking more about harrassment than simple making contact.

To clarify this hale_bopp:

email and IM contact details are the individual member's responsibility. However if a member harasses another member via these methods as a result of those details being listed and the victim makes a complaint to us, we will act on it if necessary.

PM is a different matter - this is a service within the site, provided by WrongPlanet. If this is abused to send personal attacks or harass other members the PM system is covered by the general site policy, if we are notified of a problem.

Dunc

But private messages are between two people, and punishing someone through those if the person has done nothing wrong on the site is wrong.

I see where you're coming from, forvive me though, i'm not used to these kind of rules, coming from a place where the rules are quite different.

That depends on two things really, and I'm glad you see my point.

Firstly, flaming someone by PM instead of doing it on a thread is just as unacceptable as doing it publicly. Ditto for inappropriate approaches, as mentioned by ShadesOfMe. People should not have to accept that, any more than they would accept an abusive phone call or email from a colleague.

Secondly, the PM system is part of the site, so exchanges between members while their own business should not involve being targeted for abuse. A member doing this is doing something wrong on the site therefore, albeit not in public view.

Dunc

First of all, having got some social skills in 38+ years living on this earth I sussed very early on that many/most of the people here are teenagers and so when in doubt check profiles and posts to prevent 'making a move on' somebody who's underage (or, preventing the opposite problem, married - alas, the good ones often are already taken).

(Once got tricked very cruelly online years ago by somebody I thought was an adult, even though a young one, but turned out to be only 18. The girl was literally a genius - fooled my friends in her emails. Could have got me in very hot water indeed if not with the law then with the prankster's very large, very pissed-off dad.)

But second, let's be fair. The reason many of us are online is to make friends and/or hook up since it's damn near impossible for AS people to do it offline.

Third, a lot of AS people might not know better than to try to hook up with somebody under 18.

So if it's clear in your profile you're a kid and if you suss from the offending message the person knows what he's up to and isn't just AS clueless, you can always 1) report it to the site owner or moderator and/or 2) if you can here, block that person's private messages.

Nevermind.. I understand now. I have to relise that this site deals with much more sensitive issues..

The one I came from is packed with NT's and the topics are more about general discussion and not much else.

But i still think that providing email/AIM on here is optional, and if you get IM'd on AIM, it really hasn't got anything to do with the site.

How could it be? AFAICT, there's no birthdate field in the profiles.

I notice that some members here have supplied an AIM or YIM contact, and a corresponding button appears on the bottom of their postings.

I also notice that some members choose avatar images that suggest something about their age, gender, character, or social interests.

It occurs to me that if one feels too young to be interested in IM contacts, one would be wise to omit providing their YIM/AIM contact, and avoid choosing avatar names and images suggesting otherwise.

I think that's the issue Moulton- if you don't want contact don't make your contact details viewable.

However- people may still want to be contacted but don't want inappropriate contact- pestering for phone numbers, pictures, etc from a member who has made it clear that they don't want to supply these is inappropriate and so we do need a rule in place to prevent this.

Mel (who is female despite the male avatar)

a member who has made it clear

I think this is a key issue -- making it clear what one's interests are and aren't. If one is interested in other stuff it would be wise to delimit what the other stuff does or doesn't include.