Would you say the person who started this thread has AS?

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http://www.lawnsite.com/showthread.php?t=354950

In it, I set the thread up with two aims. Firstly, to find out what the 'acceptable professional prices' are for servicing a lawn were, and two, to rile any professionals who had previously antagonized me about our low prices and how that effectively made me a "loser" in their circle with their particular term of endearment being "low-baller". Towards the end of page 7, it became clear that two of the participants had realized my secondary aim and admit their regret in getting "sucked into the thread" because they didn't realize that was my secondary goal when they first started participating. Does this kind of maneuver require a certain level of social sophistication that a male AS individual doesn't have? If so, can I *finally* convince myself that I don't have AS?

I can't believe I just read 7 pages of a lawn care professionals forum. Now I know more about professional lawnmowing than I will ever need to know. Actually some of that info might come in handy if I ever need that service.

I can't tell if you have AS or not from that thread. I can tell you believe you do because you used the term "neurotypical tribalism" which caused some eye rolling since it had nothing to do with lawn care. Really, why did you bring that up? Somebody called you out on bringing it up by saying "diagnosis: chronic Googleitis".

Last edited by Janissy on 29 Jun 2011, 3:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I have three thoughts on this:

1) Is there really a forum dedicated to lawn management professionals? I happen to find that to be quite hilarious.

2) The price really depends on not only the size of the lawn, but the quality of the service. Unless the lawn is really small (quarter acre or less), a fair price is probably going to be more than that, provided that a satisfactory job has been done.

3) I'm not sure if this means that you are NT, but I never would have even thought to do such a thing.

It was in response to the oft-quoted line...



Which suggested the site was exclusively meant for "real" professionals. As if making an early pricing mistake makes one a hobbyist or a "kid looking for milk and cookie money".

OH, THAT is what that post's implication was. I was assuming he was reporting on a deplorable trend among the young generation nowadays, and I happened to be an exemplar.

But then why not say "typical landscaper tribalism" (or something about the profession) rather than "neurotypical tribalism". It was as though you were trying to push them into deciding whether you were a "real Aspie" or not. And the two who commented on that decided you weren't. GMLC said you had "chronic Googlitis", implying that you self diagnosed after extensive googling and Patriot Landscape said "at least you paid attention in humanities class", implying that your knowledge of "neurotypical tribalism" was academic rather than inborn.

It does take a fair bit of social sophistication to be able to manipulate a couple of landscapers into essentially saying that you are not a real Aspie. Do you want me to say it too? I have no idea what the threshold is before a post is too socially sophisticated for an Aspie to have made. I've seen some very socially sophisticated posts from others here so I don't think making a socially sophisticated post is exclusionary.

But those people did have some good points. Making such an error in pricing really is a rookie mistake (they have convinced me, after I've read 7 pages of that stuff). And using swear words doesn't sound very professional.

So you didn't do that on purpose, goading them to undiagnose you? Ok then. Less socially sophisticated. Still, what's the point? You can either be satisfied with your own self diagnosis and acceopt it and go from there or you can not be and try to get a professional one. But trying to get people to diagnose/undiagnose you by parsing your post semantics seems like a lost cause. There will be no definitive answers.

After reading this, I'm amazed by how much I didn't understand in that thread. All of this sophistication went way over my head. I can't help but wonder how many times I've been socially manipulated without even knowing it.

While I was at the time of writing of the post thought this was seriously a textbook case of the typical "Neurotypicals gang up on the Aspie" scenario, I didn't intend for that implication to be in that statement and was simply trying to imply that tribalism is the usual behavior among neurotypicals. I'll admit, I tend to be antagonistic towards "neurotypicals" as a group, though I don't necessarily believe I was not neurotypical and I do believe there are tolerant, non-exclusionary neurotypicals out there (The "better" neurotypicals.).

No I cannot tell because it's impossible to tell. You can't label someone over a thread.

If you don't want to have AS, just say you don't. Since you're not diagnosed, it wouldn't be lying. Even if you are diagnosed and you don't think you have it, it still wouldn't be lying.

It can't be "neurotypicals ganging up on the Aspie" since they don't perceive you as an Aspie. Two of them scoffed in disbelief at your implication that you are. It is what you first said, professionals trying to shut out somebody they percieve as not being a professional. This has nothing to do with AS/NT. It has to do with professional/rookie. And you really are portraying yourself as a rookie in that thread. You shouldn't ever have said "I don't give a &^%$". It made you sound like somebody who was out of his league and trying tyo force his way in and that's how they responded. Tryiong to turn it into NT vs. AS when it was clearly professional vs. rookie was misguided and...rookie. If you want them to accept you as a fellow professional, you have to talk the talk, which means no *&^%$#%^.

Thanks for that advice. There's another NT female online who says that I'm supposed to not give a s**t what other people think, but apparently stating that in social situations in unkosher. Whoops, my bad.

Not giving a &^%^& what other people think can work sometimes and I'm not discounting that advice. But you have to follow through on it. Ironically, when you say "I don't give a ^&^%$ what other people think", it tells them that you care very, very much and they'll respond accordingly. Wacky as it sounds, stating flat out that you didn't care if they didn't think of you as a fellow professional told them that you cared intensely and were pleading for their acceptance as a fellow professional. I know that sounds completely inside out and backwards, but that's how it works.

For whatever it's worth, I noticed you did have a defender in that thread.