I don't even know what to call this thread

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A rant?

A question?

Discrimination?

Intolerance?

I cannot concentrate in silence. And I really mean it. My brain doesn't work right. I have to always have some kind of background noise.

So, I share an office space with 3 people. None of them mind if I play soft music while we are working. Since it doesn't disturb them and it actually helps me to focus, my opinion is that there is no issue.

Another person in our space, who has a door that can be closed, says that music in the workplace is unprofessional, especially when it distracts someone and my music distracts her. She even went so far as to "poll" 30 people to ask them if they think music in the workplace is "unprofessional" and share her results with me that 28 people said it was unprofessional. When she forwarded her poll to me, I responded "It just goes to show how truly intolerant people are of those who learn and think differently."

I try hard to always be even tempered and to embrace a wide variety of perspectives. But this has become something I am perseverating on.

Why should her "distraction" when she can simply close her office door be perceived as a more important variable than mine? Never mind the fact that she is typical. She has no disability to overcome, so when she says that the music, "distracts"her, I think she has no freaking clue what it really means to be so distracted by something that you cannot concentrate or think.

Please don't tell me to use earphones. That is not the issue here. I just don't understand why someone else's perceived "right" should outweigh mine.

Does anyone have any idea what point I am trying to make and why I am so bent out of shape about this? I mean, this is someone I genuinely like and I wasn't that upset about it until she went and made a "poll" out of it. How does proving that others are just as insensitive as you are make any point except that people like me have an uphill battle at work?

What do I do?

Why can't yyou simply wear headphones, I can assure you that on an as site plenty have issue with noise.

Why can't she close her office door?

Because there is no need.

The rest of us don't mind the music, so why should we all be denied?

Plus, why is it "unprofessional?" This is also someone who told me that I should always have the overhead light on because it is "professional." I turn it on when the others are there because they need it to see. But when it is just me, I turn it off because bright lights also distract me.

ETA, but this person says it needs to be on, because to have the office light off when someone is in is "unprofessional" and looks "unwelcoming." I don't "mingle" with the public when I am at my desk. I am most often analyzying data, developing coursework, or some other solitary task. Why does the appearance of being "professional" come before having an environment that best supports my thinking?

Proper lighting and quiet is rather crucial to a productive work environment for most. To disregard optimum working environment is without a doubt unprofessional. This isn't nt versus you, this is a large portion of the population including many who have sensory intergration issues, with noise, or difficulty reading in poor lighting.

It seems your coworker is just very set in her ways and has a very strict idea of what it means to be professional and is intolerant of anyone that gets work done or concentrates in a different manner than her. It might be that the music isn't what is distracting her, but it might actually just be her intolerance. When she hears the music, she is probably too focused on how unprofessional she thinks you are, to focus on her work. It seems you are not the one with a problem, but it is your coworker that has a problem.

Now you are just being argumentative, I suspect for the sake of being argumentative. I already said when the people who share my office space with me are present, I turn on the light. When I am there alone why is it anyone else's business what the lighting level is when I am the only one there?

You might be right. It doesn't bother her when we are talking. Only the music seems to bother her. And she does have very strong opinions about what is "professional." For example, my clothes are not "professional" enough either, according to her, even though my level of dress is similar to others in our company of similar position. Above "business casual" but less than a suit. One time I had an issue with one of my managerial counterparts and this person's response was "maybe you need to wear a suit." Um. No. The problem wasn't because I wasn't wearing a suit. The problem was she didn't like the feedback I was giving.

I just don't know why this is so upsetting to me. Usually stuff like this rolls off my back. I don't know....maybe it's because her "poll" highlights the fact that there is something "wrong" with me. As I said, I genuinely like this person and mostly feel supported by her. But the implication that the way I process information best is "wrong" is just sitting in a very bad place for me.

Maybe it is the type of music you are playing. It may be a type that she hates so much that she just can't concentrate while it's playing. Or it may be that she considers it a type that is unprofessional for your specific workplace (might be acceptable in a stockroom, might be acceptable in a yoga studio etc.) but doesn't want to get into nitpicking genres so wants to shut it down entirely.

Or she may be as unable to concentrate with music as you are unable to concentrate without it yet needs to not be cut off from the rest of the office with her door always closed. You don't know for a fact that her ability to concentrate with music is better than your ability to concetrate without it.

Maybe let your coworkers take a turn choosing the music to see if genre is the true problem. (Where I work, people take turns with music choice.) And/Or try the earplugs.

I think you have a weak case for calling it intolerance of neurological needs since she has neurological needs too.

You don't want to hear it, but I'll say it anyway : maybe you can use earphones if that also works for you. It would be less energy consuming than starting a war.

But, on the other hand, that person making a poll with all your co-workers asking if it's professional or not to listen to music in the work environment... In order to make her point... If you're the only one who listen to music and it's obvious it's you that poll is about... Well, this looks like bullying to me.

If it were me in your situation, I'm not sure what I would do... But telling that person that there are better ways to communicate her needs might be a start.

It isn't just my choice of music, it is also my coworker's, and she has tried two different kinds of music, one which is simply soft instrumental music. I mean, it's not like I am playing gangsta rap! LOL! And it is being played quietly. There is not even the need to turn the music down when someone is on the phone.

Our office environment is just general office space, with a group of us sharing a large room, and the person in question having her own office at the other end of the building. We each have jobs that require us to interface with "the public" but not in our offices. In our offices we typically tend to regular kinds of office work ranging from writing reports to data analysis.

I guess maybe I am just being a b!tch about it? It just really irks me that the implication is that I am wrong because what I need to think well is not part of what one "typically" thinks of as being conducive to thought. The first time I told her I couldn't work in silence, she told me that it was "ridiculous" and that everyone needs silence to concentrate. Even when we were in a different building with our offices on opposite side of the floor, she would tell me to turn my light on during business hours. I refused. I turned my light on if anyone came to meet with me and turned it off when they left.

To clarify: She didn't poll people that we work directly with. I don't know who the people were. But there are not 30 people in our building, and none of them mind the music except her. And she would never do anything like that, anyway.

No actually I'm not, if I were I'd entertain your opinion enough to get you going I'm not.

I'm telling you what actually is, not what you want it to be.

your coworkers, stating it is okay for music to be on is not the same as you acting professionally.

Regardless of the benefit to you, it's not good for them, there is mountains of research to suggest this. Whether or not they want to is not the question. Your encouraging others to work against there own professionalism therefore it is unprofessional. It'd be no difference if you got everyone in your work to make ret*d jokes, sure it might make you feel accepted, but it's bad for them in the long run.

The lighting thing is even worst. You say it helps, yet you only do this when no one is around. If this is really is the case your under performing due to inadequate action.

You have a disability, for others to take you seriously and to do their best you must do your own personal due diligence. This would make it an almost certainty that you seek out a more permanent long term solution. My guess is get tinted glasses similar to the type dyslexics use.

I've had similar problems with carpal tunnel/back injuries.

What I've resorted to doing is bringing in back braces and wrist wraps. Even if I don't ware em, the presence alone meant that people tended not to argue, as the message is in writing as it were.

To deal with a disability professionally, you need to have a clear message, that it's about productivity and not about personal preference. If you can't make this distinction clearly, your not gonna get support.

Stoek: OK. Point taken and thanks for the clarification.

Though, is there really "mountains of research" out there that says that soft background music is bad for productivity? I would be willing to read it if you could point me to it.

I could give you about 5 or 6 difference text books, but there expensive, and impossible to find bootlegged. It's a major part of human factors engineering, something I have a real interest in due to my, obsession with humans, my AS, and back injuries.

The reasoning is rather simple, the brain having to process any extra information than required, is under performing. Granted when attention issues are added with certain individuals it's a little different and has to be dealt with on a case by case example.