How do you detect sarcasm/teasing?

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How do you know if someone is being serious or is joking about? I keep taking 100% of the things I hear from other people 100% seriously and it often gets me upset until the person explains to me that it was a joke.

I cannot make eye contact and I don't understand intonations in the voice, so how am I supposed to detect it?

I* have that same problem and I think people know that and now do it on purpose to me just so they can get a laugh-its not very nice of them.

I'm middle-aged and I still can't detect it, and take everything said 100% seriously. Eventually I just gave up and now I tell everyone that I take everything literally, and then when it happens I can tell them SEE? TOLD YOU.

In a nutshell I guess and watch other people.

Sometimes they smile/laugh/wink while saying it or I look at other people to see if they laugh/how they react and take their cue. Sometimes I ask. If it sounds like an unbelievable or shocking statement then I stop and think about whether they are actually offensive or joking. I look at whether it fits in with their views on other things. If someone says the opposite of what they normally believe or is against their stereotype then they are probably joking e.g. if they are a very serious intellectual nerdy conservative sort of person if they talk about the latest pop songs or going clubbing it is probably a joke as out of character. If they are known to have extremist views then they probably are being serious.

I do get it wrong. Sometimes people (e.g my husband) tell me that they or other people are joking so I must. With my husband this is when I start to get wound up and defend myself. I can tell if people smile/laugh but struggle with a deadpan face. Strangely if I'm watching a comedy on TV I sometimes get things a microsecond before other people as can see where the joke is going.

I'm good at making people laugh. They say I have a dry sense of humour. I just somehow know if I say some things that come into my head that people will find it amusing, maybe I've worked out how to push the right buttons with NT people as they can be predictable. I think sometimes I am just saying it as it is, but smile or pull a face while I am saying it and NT find it funny.

I can detect it by the tone of voice. But I have a good understanding of theory of the mind, so I can just tell automatically. (Doesn't mean I'm not Aspie though - I'm typically Aspie in most other areas).

I can detect it online (I still miss it sometimes but everyone does) but it's harder in real life so I miss it more often. People can say things to me and then go "Just messing with you." Someone did that to me at work and no wonder he wasn't making sense. First he told me his fruit was a Yakima and I said I never heard of a food called that and then he said something else I can't remember and then he said he was just messing with me.

Why is it so easier online for me to detect but not in real life?

I don't know how you can NOT detect sarcasm, its usually so obvious. Saying something that is clearly askew from what one actually thinks or feels is not that subtle.

Teasing, on the other hand is quite different. I don't take "I'm just teasing you" as an excuse for saying something mean or hurtful. Cruelty is not humor. If insult or ridicule is not your intent, then don't say it at all.

Thank you for the replies. I have terrible theory of mind and I don't understand emotions. I will try to use your tips though, but I avoid eye contact religiously for 99.9% of people.

Online, people often send some kind of message with it. A smiley, perhaps, or some other verbal clue that they're joking. In real life, it's their body language that matters.

I would say I'm pretty good with sarcasm but I still get it wrong now and then (despite using it myself quite often). I often believe people are being sarcastic when they're not. Teasing is far more difficult to recognise, especially from people I don't know very well. Added to that, I don't even like it if they're doing it jokingly.

I don’t, usually. And if I do, it’s not until much later.

Obvious sarcasm can sometimes be recognized by the change in pitch of the voice. I can't really describe it; it's up, then down again, like a question, but without staying up in pitch at the end. Some people are too deadpan to use that trick on, though, so I have to analyze it logically.

Teasing takes me a while to recognize, but if it involves saying outrageous things, I'll catch on. Like, last night a couple of my friends were claiming they were serial killers, which is so obviously not true that I know they were teasing me. So I pretended I was a serial killer who collected toenails as trophies. It ended up being funny. Sometimes I don't catch on and I've found the best strategy is just to admit confusion--"I have no idea what the heck you're talking about"--and usually you'll be able to gather some clues from their response.

Chances are, if a statement is too illogical to be true, it probably is sarcasm.

It's not rocket science, unless both a literal meaning and the opposite meaning could make sense. Then, screw it.