Are female Aspies Less Likely To Be Textbook Case?
Between the traits of two spectrum labels, I'm closer to textbook autism than Aspergers.
I just don't have a severe comorbidity or any other overlapping condition that caused visibility or inability to compensate, consequently having Aspergers for an official diagnosis.
My SPED teacher (who observed me for 10+ years) explicitly stated that I'm a hybrid of both AS and I exhibit all autistic traits.
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Last edited by Edna3362 on 01 Feb 2021, 7:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I think that since all the variations of several neurological developmental disorders have been amalgamated into one umbrella diagnostic term, there is no longer such a thing as a stereotypical case of ASD.
I think that is the thing with Asperger Syndrome too, I think that as well as neurological make up,
a persons upbringing and influences in early life can have an impact as to how such a person will turn out.
Although, come to think about it, I do know that my second cousin is what I would call a stereotypical Asperger Syndrome dude. or is it he is a stereotypical IT nerd.
As he is very pedantic, superiority complex, nerd type of bloke. Nice enough bloke i believe, but just too IT for me.....
I believe the "textbook Aspie" involves these traits:-
- Prefer to be alone
- Completely socially clueless
- Too honest, cannot lie
- Flaps hands and rocks
- Nerdy
- Special interests with trains
- Excellent at maths, science and IT
- Unable to understand or express feelings, lack of emotion
- Brilliant at memorizing facts, numbers and train/bus routes and schedules
- Lack of empathy
- Undateable
- Follows rigid routines, has meltdowns if unable to
- Doesn't have a good relationship with NT parents or other NT family members
I don't think I have any of those, and the ones I may have aren't exhibited typically:-
I don't like being alone too much, and I value social interaction, social acceptance and relationships.
I am not completely socially clueless. There are some social skills I have naturally, others I have learnt. I can just be socially awkward, which isn't the same as being clueless.
I do lie. It isn't hard.
I never flap my hands or rock. If I do 'stim' it's the more socially acceptable type.
I am not nerdy in the slightest. I may be wimpy, but not nerdy.
I don't have special interests, but I used to have obsessions with certain people. But never trains or Star Wars or Pokémon. Boooooring!! !
Science, maths and technology have always been my WEAKEST subjects. I am a lot better at creative subjects such as drawing and writing.
I am EXTREMELY emotional and I can understand my own, and others, emotions. Also people often say that I'm very expressive with my emotions, more so than some NTs!
I am no good at memorizing facts and numbers or bus timetables or other things like that. I'm very good at remembering my past (which I read somewhere that this is something Aspies are unable to do)
Ok, I think we all know here that I do not lack empathy.
I find dating easy. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years, and been living with him for 3 years, with no issues. He's NT.
I do like to have a weekly routine but I can adapt to change and I don't have a rigid routine.
I have always been very close to my mother, a very healthy mother-daughter bond. I'm also very close to my other family members too.
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Female
After I was diagnosed and read up on Asperger's Syndrome trying to find out if I really had it, because the diagnostician didn't seem very competent to me, pretty much every description or case I read didn't seem to match my experience at all. It wasn't until I looked up 'female' symptoms of Asperger's Syndrome that I found something that fit and concluded that my diagnosis was likely right.
CockneyRebel
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- Prefer to be alone
- Completely socially clueless
- Too honest, cannot lie
- Flaps hands and rocks
- Nerdy
- Special interests with trains
- Excellent at maths, science and IT
- Unable to understand or express feelings, lack of emotion
- Brilliant at memorizing facts, numbers and train/bus routes and schedules
- Lack of empathy
- Undateable
- Follows rigid routines, has meltdowns if unable to
- Doesn't have a good relationship with NT parents or other NT family members
I don't think I have any of those, and the ones I may have aren't exhibited typically:-
I don't like being alone too much, and I value social interaction, social acceptance and relationships.
I am not completely socially clueless. There are some social skills I have naturally, others I have learnt. I can just be socially awkward, which isn't the same as being clueless.
I do lie. It isn't hard.
I never flap my hands or rock. If I do 'stim' it's the more socially acceptable type.
I am not nerdy in the slightest. I may be wimpy, but not nerdy.
I don't have special interests, but I used to have obsessions with certain people. But never trains or Star Wars or Pokémon. Boooooring!! !
Science, maths and technology have always been my WEAKEST subjects. I am a lot better at creative subjects such as drawing and writing.
I am EXTREMELY emotional and I can understand my own, and others, emotions. Also people often say that I'm very expressive with my emotions, more so than some NTs!
I am no good at memorizing facts and numbers or bus timetables or other things like that. I'm very good at remembering my past (which I read somewhere that this is something Aspies are unable to do)
Ok, I think we all know here that I do not lack empathy.
I find dating easy. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years, and been living with him for 3 years, with no issues. He's NT.
I do like to have a weekly routine but I can adapt to change and I don't have a rigid routine.
I have always been very close to my mother, a very healthy mother-daughter bond. I'm also very close to my other family members too.
I wanna some of those “textbook Aspie” traits would more often be used to describe those with lower-functioning forms of ASD? It seems to be the case that the “flaps hands” one is associated with them more for sure in my experience.
Sweetleaf
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Posts: 34,924
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Agreed. By some serendipity several years ago, I happen to read an article about female presentation of autism. It was much different from what I had previously learned in my work. But it fit me like a glove. All the weird stuff in my life suddenly made sense.
So yes. Females can have very different symptoms than males.
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dragonsanddemons
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I somehow manage to be what I think is very “textbook” while at the same time being very un-stereotypical. I think I basically fit the diagnostic criteria very obviously but at the same time don’t fit most stereotypes (except not liking social interaction or being around people). Hearing about how “female autism” is supposed to be so different and easy to miss/misdiagnose just makes me feel even more isolated because I can’t relate to it at all. But then again, I’m usually the exception that supposedly proves the rule.
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Same here. I'm classic to the common descriptors, which I suppose are considered male. I'm pretty much textbook.
I feel like I failed at being an "aspie female". Not only am I different from NTs, I'm different from women on the spectrum because I don't need special qualifiers.
(Diagnosed Moderate Autism, if that makes a difference)
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Word. Although being a female with ADHD can in some people's eyes make you a non-nextbook case as well. People get weird about ADHD in girls because it challenges gender stereotypes. I had this conversation with my mom a couple years ago:
mom: "Little boys are always higher-energy and harder to raise than little girls."
me: "That's a pretty big generalization."
mom: "It's not a generalization, it's just biology."
me: "Maybe to some extent, but I also think society is less accepting of hyperactive behavior in girls than in boys."
mom: "That's not true, and you wouldn't know. You have never been a parent."
me: "By that logic you wouldn't know either because you've only had daughters."
mom: "I helped raise my sister's son before you were born."
me: "Yeah, but aren't you always saying he was super quiet and well-behaved?"
mom: "Well, he was more active than you girls."
me: "Even than I was?"
mom: "Yes."
me: "Interesting, then why was I taken by you to get an ADHD diagnosis when I was 12? Was it because society has a lower bar for what they consider disordered hyperactivity in girls or is it because I am indeed more active than he was?"
mom: ...
me: "CATCH 22"
Interesting. Let me see how I stack up.
- Prefer to be alone Yeah, most of the time
- Completely socially clueless Not completely
- Too honest, cannot lie I can lie, but I don't lie well
- Flaps hands and rocks Usually only when no one is looking
- Nerdy Yes
- Special interests with trains I did when I was a kid, -also planes and cars and boats.
- Excellent at maths, science and IT Yes, although I got in trouble in those classes a lot as a kid
- Unable to understand or express feelings, lack of emotion No
- Brilliant at memorizing facts, numbers and train/bus routes and schedules Only if it's something I can draw.
- Lack of empathy I don't think so, but how can I tell?
- Undateable No. Luckily my romantic partners have all been really patient
- Follows rigid routines, has meltdowns if unable to Kind-of, although to me they are not rigid, just necessary so that I can get my stuff done each day
- Doesn't have a good relationship with NT parents or other NT family members No. I love my family
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