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08 Sep 2006, 8:42 pm

Is there anyone on here who does try reading between the lines?


I sure try and it turns out I goofed up lol. There have been times like:


Last summer I was at work and I got back to the laundry room from picking up laundry and my boss said "Beth you're knocking down the door." And I turn around and look at the door and see it's still up. So I walk back over to it thinking 'Perhaps she meant something else' so I am staring at it and looking at it trying to figure out what I did to it even though it was still up. Then she said "It's a figure of speech Beth." And I said "what's a figure of speech?"
She starts explaining to me what 'figure of speech' means but I interrupt her by asking her what did she say that was a figure of speech and she said "Knocking down the door" and I said oh. She told me it meant I'm bumping the walls in the hallways with the laundry cart.
I try not to do it but with so much dirty linen in it, it gets harder to push and the cart ends up going crooked when I'm pushing it. There was me trying to read between the lines of trying to figure out what she meant by it but I still got confused what she said.

Another time was I was at a second hand store looking at videogames and accessories. I was looking in this box that was full of memory cards and N64 expansion packs. I bought another PS1 memory card because I ran out of block space on my other one and when the guy was adding up the total I saw the expansion pack on the counter with the items I'm getting and I tell him I'm not getting it and he said 'It must have jumped out,' as he was putting it back in the box. I assumed he was joking because items cannot jump out of boxes so I said "It probably wanted me to buy it," and he said 'no' and said something else but I forget what he said. Then I realized he wasn't joking and he was serious so I apologized telling him I thought he was kidding since items can't move and he told me it was a good joke I did anyway. I am working on not to take everything so literal so I figured out when people say something that doesn't make any sense, assume it's a figure of speech but the problem is, then I don't understand what they are saying. Then I started to work on knowing when people are kidding or joking or teasing.



Okay Berta here's another post you can flame.



superfantastic
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08 Sep 2006, 8:50 pm

I don't have so much trouble reading between the lines as I do knowing when someone's kidding. My cousin kids me all the time, but no matter how much I expect it, I can't help thinking it might be true. The last time I think he told me he knew Chinese.



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08 Sep 2006, 10:25 pm

Reading between the lines? Well, if it's literally reading, I'm excellent at it. I am very sensitive to the proper connotations and uses of words because words are one of my favorite things and I almost collect them. Likewise, I tend to collect idioms and other patterns of speech, so that sort of thing doesn't trip me up as often as it does some Aspies.

I often don't figure out that people are making a joke until five seconds after they finish it, though--or I'll laugh at something and make everyone else stare at me. I'm not great with humor.


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DirtDawg
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08 Sep 2006, 11:04 pm

There are literally thousands of those damned things and a significant, inclusive book would be fairly large. I've considered starting a thread to list some of the more trippy ones. I think it would make an entertaining thread.

I found a kid's book at the library that was loaded with 'figures of speech' for my son and he really got into it. He went around speaking in color metaphors and odd but interesting similes for a month. I was desparate to help him, because he would not accept things like the words 'very' and 'vary' were different. That little silly book worked wonders for him. Sorry, I can't remember the title, but he might. I would love to find an adult version of the book he read to continue his education in this area.


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krex
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08 Sep 2006, 11:45 pm

I have never heard that expresion"knocking down the doors"....doesnt even make sense.
and your response to the clerk was funny...his response was strange...No...is he aspie?

I read alot and write poetry so I learned alot of "expressions" and similies but I am still very literal in my daily life...My first response is leteral but if that turns out to not be true then I can work things out logically most of the times...but I never would have gotten"knocking down the doors"...geeez


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09 Sep 2006, 12:28 pm

This happens to me all the time the failure to read between the lines that is. I will be in a groupe of people and they will be tring to talk about someone without mentioning names and I never understand they always have to take me aside and tell me who the are talking about. I is funny sometimes but most of the time it is just plain sad. They know that I can not read between the lines so they try to help me out. I assume that they talk about me in the same way and I suspect they do it when I am in the room which is not so funny. I think that this is one of the worst aspects of asperger's .


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09 Sep 2006, 1:44 pm

When someone makes a statement or uses a phrase I don't understand, I come straight out and say: "sorry, I didn't get the joke, I never heard it before" in a plain, matter-of-fact voice. Most of the times, the other person gives me a brief explanation, and I walk away with little or no embarassment.



Musical_Lottie
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09 Sep 2006, 6:32 pm

Problem stage 1: Knowing when to read between the lines.
Problem stage 2: Actually being able to.

I'm so used to my friends inplying jesting insults about me that I now ask people what they're implying, when they'r enot implying anything. Ooops ... :oops:


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09 Sep 2006, 6:57 pm

I can't read between the lines. Unfortunately for me, people have to be really blunt and clearly say what they mean for me to get it.



Tim_Tex
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09 Sep 2006, 7:00 pm

I have no problem reading between the lines. In fact, I am quite good at it.

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VesicaPisces
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09 Sep 2006, 7:05 pm

"Reading between the lines" is also a figure of speech. I tend to interpret the literal meaning first and then determine the implied meaning.


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10 Sep 2006, 2:51 am

VesicaPisces wrote:
"Reading between the lines" is also a figure of speech. I tend to interpret the literal meaning first and then determine the implied meaning.


I was just going to say that :lol:



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11 Sep 2006, 5:52 pm

I have a *lot* of difficulty with this. If it's a metaphor I've never heard before, I'll just look at the person blankly. I can't figure out for myself what it might mean. Also very bad at getting jokes. If someone says something that sounds perfectly feasible and doesn't say it in a very obviously 'joking' way, I'll assume they're being serious. It's still the same even if I've known someone a long time. I can't tell whether or not my father's joking if he says it with a straight face.



lupin
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12 Sep 2006, 3:14 am

Musical_Lottie wrote:
Problem stage 1: Knowing when to read between the lines.
Problem stage 2: Actually being able to.



I think you summed it up neatly here, ML.

On paper I can do anything, because I have the time to logic things through. In face-to-face exchanges I am lost.

In fact, it's weird because I ALWAYS forget that in 'the other world' (of NTs) there are such things as lines that require reading between. Like, I have an NT 'lines' encounter where I'm expected to play the 'hunt the meaning' game (it invariably shocks me as to how they could possibly mean what they mean given what they just said) and then promptly and forgetfully revert to my strong default mode - which is plain, straightforward, say-what-I-mean. So, overwhelmingly, I never even know that there is a Problem stage 1 (until it bites me hard).



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12 Sep 2006, 3:21 am

I think reading between the lines and our alleged inability to do that often goes a lot further than just interpreting metaphor. I am very good at interpreting metaphor. But I have difficulty reading between the lines when it comes to people's behavior. I take what people say as the honest truth, and this has gotten me into trouble in the past.

I think that NTs have the ability to determine all sorts of things about a person just by the manner or expression that people use and this is where I often fail to see the hidden meanings.



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12 Sep 2006, 3:24 am

Don't have much of a problem with reading between the lines, but I have to have heard the expression before to understand what it means. As far as "knocking down the door," I have little clue as to what that might have meant. I guess, thinking deeply about it, it could mean that you're piling up so many clothes that, if they were placed against the door, that the door could fall down. Other than that, it doesn't mean much to me. I can usually rationalize most expressions, but there are times where I have come to find out that they actually meant something else. I have more problems determining whether or not someone is kidding, and I also tend to believe that some people kid around with an intention of creating distress. Many people who throw around racial jokes, and who are joking around while doing so, in fact do have racist ideologies. I believe a lot of kidding is just play speech designed to hide the individual's true beliefs.

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