Rant about my worthlessness

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I'm not sure where to go with this...sorry if it's the wrong section.

I'm 18 and should've gotten HS diploma but didn't because of failed classes. Really the only reason is because I had so much trouble doing homework. The school counselor kept trying to help by having me make up the classes I failed. But I couldn't. Now I'm here at home, with nothing to do. I have no friends. I have never gotten a job in my life and probably never will because I have like no qualifications to and I'm really scared. My counselor now says I have to go to adult school in order to get high school diploma. Don't really want to have to go through the pain that school put me through yet again. Plus, my mom and grandma have already paid so much money to get me to make up those classes. I pretty much feel worthless. Also I can't drive, so I'm stuck. Basically all I do is sit on my computer all day. I'm not good at anything, I have no talents or hobbies, nothing I'm passionate about.

Anyway, my therapist thinks I have Asperger's (not diagnosed). I just started going to this therapist for like 1-2 months now. It's really helped because I'm a pretty closed person. My mom has scheduled me to go see a psychiatrist today. Don't really know what's going on there. I don't even know when it is and how we're getting there (no one in my household drives). My mom doesn't tell me much. But what I know is that this should've happened years ago and maybe I would've gotten my diploma and graduated with my class.

It also doesn't help that the few people around me are nagging about everything. I mean, my mom and grandma have NEVER disciplined me at all or done much of anything to further my development. I haven't done chores at all, and now they suddenly expect me to be able to just get up and do chores. I mean, for years they just let me sit back here alone. They never helped me with anything, and I'm really surprised that they even got me to a therapist and are now making arrangements for a psychiatrist. My grandma and other family members have also been pressuring me into using a cellphone (they bought it for my birthday and I hardly used it) when they know I don't like talking on the phone.

Done for now. From what I'm describing about me, do you think I have Asperger's? I took some of those online tests that I found on here, and things are pointing that way. I know I have something wrong with me though.

idk dude most common thing for aspies to do is get 100% on test and never do homework and somehow get Cs

You're very good at writing and explaining and summarizing, I can tell you that much from your post alone. And probably much more that is not apparent from one post. When you say you're not passionate about anything, do you mean currently due to depression or has this been a lifelong thing? I mean what makes you happy?

I can understand not wanting to go back to school. If you express your concerns to your psychiatrist and your desire to find out if you have Asperger's maybe you can get diagnosed and then have accommodations put in place to make finishing school easier.

Generally, we put rants and such in 'The Haven', but it's fine here, if you like.



Keep looking, something will strike you. Access your authentic self. Experiment with new things. At 18 one can be very confused about what one is here for.



Yeah, I've been there: if only someone had known there was something wrong and helped me. Well that's in the past now, and sometimes we just have to help ourselves. I hope you can find some support though.



My mother suddenly decided that we (the kids) should start pulling their weight after my parents divorced, having previously never taught us to do a thing for ourselves.

It sounds like they are at least trying to help you out, misplaced though some of it feels, and abrupt and strange.



Maybe.

If you want to know, take the tests, see a doctor... no one can tell you for 100% certainty. Hang around and read here, see if anything matches your experience.

When I was 18, I didn't have a job, I didn't have any interest or hobbies or anything, and I wasn't responsible for very much either. I couldn't drive, and I never thought I would amount to anything. Things have changed for me in 5 years. I know everybody says that, and that you think "Oh, but with me it's different" but I thought it was different with me as well. I was convinced I would never do anything, but I have. It doesn't matter what you work towards as long as it's something. Even if you aren't working towards something, work at something.

Find something that you are interested in, or just enjoy doing, and do it. Let it take over your life, get really good at it and everything else takes care of itself.

If you really, truly have no ideas, give programming a try.

Get your GED. It's pretty easy in most states.

Get tested for AS also. Having results from an AS test will help you understand yourself, but you still need to show a base level education. Take more time if you need to. I think I waited till I was 20 till I got mine, turns out I was smarter than I thought I was. High test results. Now I think I'm a freaking genius, but that's another story altogether.

It's quite possible you are AS, if school type work is difficult for you because you think differently. Many AS types are visually oriented, you sound like you're very good with words and at 18, it's impressive. Most 18 year old's these days can barely toss together a coherent 20 word text message.

You know there's a huge demand in the work place for people who can write and convey an idea with ease. I'm not just talking about writing the great american novel either. Look around. Every industry has something to do with writing.

I remember someone once saying on the internet photography is a useless skill to have in the workplace. He couldn't be more incorrect, it's used for everything from cooking to law enforcement and everything in between. I'm just using that as an example. You get my point.