Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

ScientistOfSound
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 May 2011
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,014
Location: In an evil testing facility

23 Sep 2011, 4:03 am

Ok so I'm 17, and I go to college. Often, during lectures or when sitting down, I tap my fingers and bounce my legs (its a compulsion thing, I NEED to do it) and I often find people giving me funny looks. They know I'm autistic, but I don't think they fully understand what stimming is. I've tried to explain it to them but they never seem to get it. What should I tell them?



TwistedReflection
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 180
Location: At the End of Everything

23 Sep 2011, 4:55 am

It would depend on their ability to understand, I believe, as some NTs are more progressive than others. Mine are usually active when in places with loads of sensory stimuli, such as thoroughfares with lots of oncoming traffic and people milling about. I zone out, fidgeting with the strap of my bag almost constantly, looking down at my watch and pretending to be concerned by the time. It's all an act, of course, but it's all about maintaining the illusion that I'm like them. Other times, I don't care who sees me stimming, and I'll rock gently back and forth in my seat, but I doubt that anyone with only basic-level knowledge of Autism would assume that I was stimming.

You could try telling them that it's a physical means of processing aberrant or errant thoughts or thought patterns though, if that's not too technical for them to comprehend. Or, you might want to use analogies of some kind if you are able to understand and use them yourself, as NTs respond very well to analogies and mental images that amount to the same thing. My favourites are the washing machine or tornado metaphors, that my thoughts are sometimes like either of the two, using debris or laundry as stand-ins for racing thoughts. Every now and again, my head goes through "spin-cycles", cue a peak in anxiety levels and risk of panic attack, necessitating the stimming. It's about bringing yourself back from being in "spin-cycle" all the time so that you can function in day-to-day life.

Really, however, that's why I stim; it might be different for you. I also stim for comfort or when I'm in a good (or bad) mood, but that is much harder to explain to NTs, unless you relate it to de-stressing or something. Hope that helps :D



MommyJones
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Dec 2008
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 684
Location: United States

23 Sep 2011, 7:20 am

If an NT is having a hard time understanding, my suggestion would be to keep it really simple. NT's stim too, they play with rubber bands when they are nervous, they shake their foot, they rub a worry rock. Most people know what a stress ball is. When you squeeze it in your hand you relax. For you, tapping your fingers and bouncing your leg is like your stress ball. If you bridge your stim over to something that NT's commonly do for the same reason, then they can relate to it better.



mds_02
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Sep 2011
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,077
Location: Los Angeles

23 Sep 2011, 8:40 am

ScientistOfSound wrote:
What should I tell them?


I say you tell them to go to hell, it's none of their business.


_________________
If life's not beautiful without the pain, 
well I'd just rather never ever even see beauty again. 
Well as life gets longer, awful feels softer. 
And it feels pretty soft to me. 

Modest Mouse - The View


retrom
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 20 Sep 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 34

23 Sep 2011, 10:17 am

I'd just call it a nervous tic/habbit. And if they ask why you're nervous just say its an anxiety problem or just part of being autistic.



jojobean
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,341
Location: In Georgia sipping a virgin pina' colada while the rest of the world is drunk

23 Sep 2011, 11:59 am

just tell them that it calms you because of the repetive motions are like a mental massage.

Jojo


_________________
All art is a kind of confession, more or less oblique. All artists, if they are to survive, are forced, at last, to tell the whole story; to vomit the anguish up.
-James Baldwin


Ellytoad
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2011
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 424

24 Sep 2011, 6:08 pm

When my mom would ask me what I was doing, I would claim that it was a nervous tic. She would then try to tell me that they were completely controllable.
Hardly! They're like itches, how long are you going to go before you give up and scratch?



Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,275
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

24 Sep 2011, 6:19 pm

My therapist keeps asking me what stimming does for me but I am unable to answer. Maybe I should explain what not stimming is like.



Karuna
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 17 Aug 2011
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 485

24 Sep 2011, 6:33 pm

I find stimming burns nervous energy and allows me to concentrate. I think it's the same as pacing is for some people, part of your brain is occupied with the mechanics of walking and that frees up the rest of your brain for thinking.



animalcrackers
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Feb 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,207
Location: Somewhere

24 Sep 2011, 6:48 pm

Hmmm...not sure how I'd explain stimming to an NT...or to anybody else, for that matter. The best explanation I can come up with is:

Stimming seems to help my brain process and regulate the information coming in from my nervous system....if I didn't stim, I'd be constantly overwhelmed by my environment.



aspie48
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Mar 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,291
Location: up s**t creek with a fan as a paddle

24 Sep 2011, 7:12 pm

just say it helps relax.



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,280
Location: Pacific Northwest

24 Sep 2011, 7:15 pm

Verdandi wrote:
My therapist keeps asking me what stimming does for me but I am unable to answer. Maybe I should explain what not stimming is like.



I would have a difficult time answering that too. It's like asking "why do you blink your eyes, what does that do for you?" "Why do you doodle, what does that do for you?" "Why do you squeeze something in your hand, what do that do for you?" and see if they can answer those.

Honestly the only answer I know to stimming is it keeps us calm. But what does it do for us? (rhetorical question)