Hey krex
I think you hopped threads there, but it's ok, Bazza won't notice, he's busy trying to figure out which side of his hat to fold up so when he can't stand up and he's leaning against the wall in the pub washroom his hat won't get knocked off and fall into the puddle he's making on the floor.
That was an important point you made about the possibility that you might have something that gets worse with time, or something they can do something about. I got diagnosed a while back with depression - it was about as obvious as my hair color - and after prozac turned me into a zombie I ended up taking wellbutrin, which helped my depression but of course didn't help what was causing the depression: the worst marriage in history and my aspie inability to influence events which involved other people's judgements. If it had been just regular depression, though, it would have helped me a lot.
It's pretty obvious that I have a tendency to overgeneralize, mental health people being a case in point. It's theoretically possible that there's some sensible people working in mental health whose opinions are worth listening to. Ol' Hans Asperger was a mental health professional, and I'd be a lot worse off if he had done something else instead. Who knows how long it would have taken for somebody else to notice what he noticed.
I remember when I was a kid, reading about the discovery of the coelacanth, that fish that everybody thought had been extinct for millions of years. It was closely related to the first fish that came up on land. The scientist saw a stuffed one in some out of the way small town museum, where they thought it was just a weird fish. He recognized it immediately and wanted to learn all about how it was put together, but they told him they had long ago thrown away everything except the skin. "I'll never get another chance for something like this in my life," he said.
His wife told him, "If there's one, there must be others."
This is a serious shortcoming in my ability to accurately perceive the world I have to live in. It was driven home by the recent long and bitter arguments by the aspie males driven mad with an insane hatred for women. It was disturbing because I used to be there. I'm grateful I never hurt anybody else too badly, I never hit a woman or raped anyone, or influenced anybody else's opinion - everybody could see I was crazy, and other people had not experienced the depth and fullness of the aspie male experience - but I know how much pain I caused myself for so long. Impotent rage is no fun at all, and it takes over your life.
I'm still not sure how I got beyond all that. A lot of it had to do with finally realizing that males didn't like me any better than females, I just hadn't noticed because females have these female faces and female bodies and female voices. What's most significant is that it took over so much of my life, and it wasn't reality. Maybe I just got old; maybe I just gave up; I'm not sure, but I know I wouldn't want to go back.
Lao Tze said, "When you are sick of sickness, you are no longer sick." I'm sure you know the AA people say something very similar. There's no chance I can do anything to improve my life if I can't perceive what's really going on in my life.
_________________
They murdered boys in Mississippi. They shot Medgar in the back.
Did you say that wasn't proper? Did you march out on the track?
You were quiet, just like mice. And now you say that we're not nice.
Well thank you buddy for your advice...
-Malvina