How/when to reveal AS to peers?

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I've recently moved back in with my parents for at least a few semesters until I get a degree, and because of this I'm attempting to make new social relationships altogether. I've only been somewhat recently diagnosed so the reasons for my difficulties are much more clear to me now, but I'm not sure how to make it clear to other people.

For example, with a group of acquaintances I've been around for a few months now got very offended by something I said, I did mention to one of the people later that I had AS, and to my surprise he was already familiar with it and immediately understood. Word got around and now we are all on good terms, but I feel like I should have revealed it earlier because he mentioned to me a lot of other social mistakes I did earlier that I didn't even realize. People thought I was just being full of myself.

Really though I don't know at what level of social contact should you explain it. It seems that my old strategy of waiting until I mess up so badly that I realize it doesn't work because by then I probably have turned off some people that might have otherwise understood and given me a chance. I'm not very obviously autistic like some people are but eventually my NT disguise always fails at some point.

So what do you guys do when telling people that aren't employers/family about AS? And how/when do you decide explain it? Has it worked out well in the past?

This is a really tough one.
I personally don't "reveal" my AS to anyone (my parents and boyfriend know, but that's it)
but that's because I don't have friends and can pass for semi-normal, if a little quirky, in light conversations such as at the checkout or a doctor's office.

I would say to skip it unless it causes an issue, but then you run into people thinking you're
a. making it up
and/or
b. using it as an "excuse" to be rude.

I has nothing.

I'm afraid people would think I was trying to use it as an excuse, so I don't tell anyone. I'm not much help, I suppose.

Basically I told everyone through Facebook a few months back. I was tired of trying to explain away my very existence, which is what it always came down to when they asked anything about how/what I was doing. Depression, anxiety and other mental illnesses figured into my awkward non-answers but in general I will always find ways of living that aren't the norm more suitable for me, even when not ill, so I figured I might as well give people a one-time simple explanation rather than feeling like I'm making "excuses" when asked why I didn't finish college, why I am always coming up with these weird projects that would make the average person think "If she can do that, why can't she get an office or service job", blah blah blah. I was through feeling sheepish for doing my best, therefore, I posted about Asperger's in the context of a post about jobs or something.

I never tell people about my AS for lot of reasons. One of them is because I feel embarrassed about it and I can't stand talking about it or hearing topics about it around people. My mom is naive to think I should tell people but she doesn't realize how bad it can get if I told people and it doesn't always make things better.

2 of my 3 sisters know. 3 long-time friends know. (one of them figured it out, and i didn't deny it.) my husband knows. i don't plan on telling anyone else, not even my doctor.

Never.

I've tried to explain Autism to my peers, and they still see as just another form of mental retardation, so I will never reveal to them that I have AS.

My peers have shown by thier ape-like social dynamic's of GPA comparison's to see where one's social status is in life.
Where they faultly induce that they are much less cognizant than there presumptious reminiscence of me/others being subverisent or even drooling Austropithecus because of my/there mediocre B+ performance in a special congregated class of elitist or self deflecting people who don't want to be seen as inferior , thus explaining the rampant , audacious comparisons.

In Simple English : Apes will be Apes , though it's good to make them understand about who you are , so as they pick lice and eat it while they talk about thier day and gossiping about who has what , give them some direction on what you have because in the long run people will at least understand you , rather than label you in the crazy zone.

If you want to 'come out of the closet' in front of a class or a crowd of rambunctious adolescents , best to do it infront of an authority such as an Understanding Adult Teacher who can redirect misinterpretation such as comments like Ass Burgers ( which do sound good ) towards reality. Making your life easier..

My friends actually worked it out. It actually worked out well, before they thought i was just an arrogant jerk. But they did some research on my symptoms and actually found Asperger's Syndrome. They've never actually spoken to me about it, however i hear them talking about it often. They are a lot more understanding now though, and my friendships with them have got better.

However, if i had personally told them i had AS, it would probably come across as an excuse.

(I only have 3 friends) lol.

I think the only logical times to make such a revelation are only after you've examined the likely outcomes and are convinced that there will be a positive result from sharing this information. IMO, such situations are few and far between but definitely do exist. While all of us on this forum have a fairly deep understanding of the issues as a result of having both lived and studied them, the average person out there has very limited knowlege of Aspergers and autism. Whatever stereotypes they have will instantly become attached to you and there's no way for us to know ahead of time whether their preconceptions are positive or negative. I think there are situations where telling could be helpful but if you're feeling like it's something inside you that you just need to share with the world, it might be best to think twice. Just my two cents.

If you're in college, the people there should be reasonably enlightened and understanding. If I were you, I would tell them at the first meeting. First, talk to them for a while. Then, in a gap in the conversation, or at a time when they mention something similar to Asperger's Syndrome (like a disability or something), tell them about your Asperger's Syndrome. Explain to them your symptoms and explain about how you may accidentally hurt their feelings and ask them to simply correct you so you can fix it. Try to keep the explanation to five sentences or less (excluding one word sentences).

That's what I do, and it works every time. I would NOT hide Asperger's Syndrome from anyone if I didn't have to. I think maybe the reason ValentineWiggin doesn't have friends is because his peers think he's mean because they don't know he has Asperger's Syndrome. Also, I think the fixing it part of the explanation is important so they don't think you're trying to make excuses and they know you want to improve.

I find that my aspie tendencies really seem to exacerbate issues in people who have insecurities.

My closest friends and people I know, the people who I get along with the best, neurotypical or not, are very secure people. They know who they are, they know how to act, they know how treat others and interact with others.

People who have diffuculty getting close to me, or who I have 'unknowingly' upset, I usually find out the source of the upset has to do with some insecurity they have. At which point I have to wonder, is my involvement with them really that important?