Sometimes feeling "more" autistic?

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I'm just wondering if I'm the only one who has days where I have days where I seem lower on the spectrum than I'm diagnosed with, I'm not sure how else to say it, but I think certain days if I were to be assessed I'd have a more significant diagnosis than other days.


An example would be yesterday. I'm used to getting weird looks in public and my Mum and I just ignore them normally, but even my Mum was giving me that "Stop that, we're in public!" Look, she doesn't do that often at all, but I was making random noises and stimming in obvious ways, spacing out or sort of being in my own head and getting distracted more, not really wanting to talk, and when I tried it was difficult to get the right words and concepts out. I thought maybe the distraction and spacing could have been my ADHD, but even Caffeine wasn't helping it, and that's always a sure fire way to fix that problem.

Does anyone else have times like this?

Yep, I don't only have days that are worse, I also have sets of months that I average to "more autistic" in. They tend to be about 6 months every 2 years. Both in those months and out of them I also have periods of time that I'm just much more visibly autistic.

It's perfectly normal for an autistic person's skills, abilities, level of perceived function to vary wildly.

There were a few years that I was hardly autistic except my lack of social skills but as I am getting older I am regressing more into the autistic behaviors. Some days are worse than others on top of that. Some days I am more like the old days (when I was a child) in which I was moderately autistic and other days I am almost normal in all ways. Some days the sensory overload is intense. When I go outside and into other places such as a restaurant of a mall I have to hold my ears and rock back and forth even while standing in place. Also at that time my heart races and I sometimes even get an anxiety attack. Other times it doesn't bother me as much. Even my speech is different. Some days I speak in a monotone voice, sounding like a robot. Other days I have no disability in my speech patterns. I vary this much even with my schizoaffective disorder as well. Some days I have actually scared people and people look at me funny. Other days I am perfectly normal in both my schizoaffective disorder and my autism.

The most time that passed in which both disorders were close to normal was about 3-4 years at most. There is a reason for that though. There was no stress almost whatsoever in our lives. Mom didn't have constant illnesses and surgeries with complications, our financial situation was nearly perfect and we can afford a new car occasionally and buy it outright ( we bought 2 in one year and one was $36,000 and the other was $20,000 and we just literally handed them a check paying the entire thing), we would go on expensive vacations one costing about $20,000 and that wasn't a problem, I didn't have to worry about my dad retiring without any money, stocks that we had were at record highs (that is why our financial situation was perfect) and I was in flight school and its something that I loved. I also at that time just recently got out of a situation that I was severely bullied and moved away into a much bigger house. Now its the total opposite. Our financial situation is horrible and at times it looks like we will lose everything we own, I am occasionally bullied online, my mom is near death multiple times a year, dad is going to retire with no money in a couple of years and it will force us to move into a dump in a bad area with nothing to look forward to again. So, since my stress is very high, my symptoms from my teenage years and young childhood has come back in the last 5-6 years and is getting worse each year.

At one time I was studying to become a pilot because at that time I was the most stable in my entire life. It was the perfect time in my life. I would love to fly (I never soloed though the anxiety got in the way) again but always with someone but its too expensive. I recently looked at the price and its gone up considerably. Airplanes are one of my special interests. I also build balsa model airplanes. I fear that I will end up as autistic as when I was a child and the doctors back then told my parents that I should be institutionalized for life. Also that I would never talk or even go to school. I accomplished going to college and graduating with honors and speak at autism conferences. I am just scared that I will regress further.

Yes. I spend a load of time alone now so I have the space to observe and learn about myself.

Cold dry weather is the worst.

If I don't get enough oils in my diet or hot meals or liquids in general I feel really vulnerable.

If I'm drinking cold water. Boiled water which has cooled down to warm I find is best. Or just plain warm or room temp water can be comforting.

Dry foods like crackers or bread or biscuits make for a horrid day - they absorb the bodys liquids and make me feel exposed to stimli.

I get worse in the summer months, July-September, then it gets better in the fall. Don't know why exactly, but I do hate heat and it causes all kinds of anxiety to be out in the heat, and everything spirals downward from there.

Thanks guys!

I'm pretty sure I've had weeks and months, too, especially the last few years because of stress and health problems. I'm just glad to know this is normal on the spectrum and that I'm not alone