Incredulity @ u getting along with ppl, esp. opposite sex

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Keeno
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05 Jul 2011, 6:58 pm

Does the following type of situation happen to you on a regular basis?

I can see there are some people who perceive me as someone who doesn't connect with people. Especially (GASP!) the opposite sex, they must think that's especially incredulous.

A new girl recently started at work, and the relationship we have seems positive, unusually so for when it's a member of the opposite sex. I've certainly not detected any indicators of romantic interest from her, I don't mean that, but as a friendly, working relationship it's positive.

We were sitting at lunch and one of our colleagues walked past. Observing how well me and this girl were getting on, the look on his face was somewhere between surprise, amazement, incredulity and shock.

Apologies for the text speak in the subject line, it's because it was too long to fit otherwise.


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Lene
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05 Jul 2011, 7:05 pm

Quote:
We were sitting at lunch and one of our colleagues walked past. Observing how well me and this girl were getting on, the look on his face was somewhere between surprise, amazement, incredulity and shock.


I would love to have seen it :D Some people forget that just because you don't fit with their group doesn't mean you don't get along with other people.

I always love meeting my boyfriend's friends; they're refreshingly easy to chat to and they remind me that not everyone on the planet is like my college class (verrry cliquey). Nice people are like a breath of fresh air.



Panic
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05 Jul 2011, 9:00 pm

your either delusional or not aspie or delusional aspie



Blue_Star
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06 Jul 2011, 12:16 am

Panic wrote:
your either delusional or not aspie or delusional aspie


How does having friends of the opposing gender or sex make one delusional or not have Asperger's? The vast majority of my friends are male, while I'm female. Within the last year I've acquired more female friends than before, but they're new friends who were/are friends of a former male friend of mine.



Keeno
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01 Nov 2011, 8:13 am

Just back from a lunch break in the staff room with the same girl, and the exact same reaction came again, this time from a different person. WTF?



OJani
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01 Nov 2011, 9:20 am

Lene wrote:
I would love to have seen it :D Some people forget that just because you don't fit with their group doesn't mean you don't get along with other people.

This. You may also say "their clique".

I have two good acquaintances of the opposite gender (I'm male). None of them are close friends with me, though.



ictus75
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01 Nov 2011, 9:48 am

This feeds into the Aspie stereotypes, namely that Aspies all have trouble relating to others, especially people of the opposite sex. While it may be true that we are more awkward in social situations, sometimes you meet someone who you just get along with. It happens. I don't find it unusual that you get along with this girl. I know that in my life, I've found a few people of both sexes that I easily get along with, while most other people I have difficulty relating to.


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ToughDiamond
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01 Nov 2011, 11:35 am

A woman I later married, before she knew me well, was visibly surprised :o when we were trying to arrange a date and I told her what I already had in my social diary. "You do allright, don't you?" she said. My social life was pretty big in those days, but I guess I didn't come over as particularly gregarious when I was at work, which is where we met. I suppose it's something that a woman was intrested in me even though I didn't look particularly successful socially.

More recently (1990s) another woman at work one day told me that she felt she had to get to know me all over again, as she'd just seen me hugging my girlfriend goodbye as I went into work. That girlfriend was attractive in the mainstream sense of the word......the surprised woman couldn't quite fathom how somebody as low in the food chain as I could have acquired such a status symbol. I was pretty annoyed about the way she'd previously labelled me some kind of sexual loser.

Strange how both times it happened at work. Perhaps there's something about workplaces that shows me in a bad light?



swbluto
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01 Nov 2011, 11:51 am

Keeno wrote:
Just back from a lunch break in the staff room with the same girl, and the exact same reaction came again, this time from a different person. WTF?


They're just insulting you so the best thing to do is ignore it.



Keeno
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02 Nov 2011, 8:14 am

Even so, taking into account that this keeps raising eyebrows, do folks think I'm on to something, that there's something here I can work with? In other words, is this a sign that folks perhaps see there's something deeper and that's why they're so amazed? Because it's happening with this girl and not any other girl, am I maybe missing something regarding my chances of a deeper relationship that others are seeing in their amazement?



Ganondox
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02 Nov 2011, 9:18 am

I think I get a long better with girls than I do with other boys.