Being an Aspie is the worst

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Im 24 now, I stopped using this site becasue so many people here are delusional to what autism and aspergers really is.

I live conscious of what NTs do and normal people, and i see them all progressing in life, making money, socializing, finding love partners having friends, while im stuck in this dark black hole called autism.


no one here seems to understand that they are mentally handicap and cannot live on their own, and out of the 1 in a million people who somehow do manage to catch a break and get a good job, that is all the aspies and clueless people talk about.

My mind is empty, my face is blank, that is my existence.

There is always someone in this world who's got it worse than you do.

The key to living a good life is not having a perfect life; it's all in your attitude. It may be harder to "catch a break" as a person with Autism, but it is not impossible to live happily and successfully.

What Sparx said.

Also, you have to remember that it's their life. You should be worrying about yours. If you keep comparing yourself to your successors, you will most likely fail. Everyone aspires in a different way.

its impossible to live happily im just waiting for a good enough excuse to end it, just havent had a reason that justifies it yet

So far today I made a complete A out of myself in front of an entire class because I took what the teacher said literally, I had facial and visual stimm in front of people in a hallway I didn't know, I have no real friends and very few acquaintances who can tolerate me (that's only because they don't know me), I lost a kid at a Halloween carnival and did not know it because I was so lost in the crowed, I never heard the load speaker calling for me because I can't hear anything in a crowed except a rumble, I was having sensory issues and was nearly shut down, in the lab that I work in 5 hours a week I was caught stimming this time I was reading a book rocking, pulling my ears, clamping my hands over them and humming (I am sure I looked insane!). 90% of the time I am lost (literally) and blank, my expressions are blank and unreadable, I am COMPLETELY body language and social cue blind. I still love who I am!! !! !! !! !! ! I see things other people don't, I understand concepts that boggle others, I am more loyal and honest then anyone I know. My family knows how I am and don't even care about the AS, they just accept me for who I am, they know my weaknesses and they go out of their way to help me. DO NOT call me delusional, DO NOT tell me that I have it easy, and DO NOT tell me that I can not enjoy life because I have aspergers!! !! !! !! !

I have two working legs, I can see to read and watch sun rises, I have great kids (two of which also have AS traits) even if I am not the worlds best mom I love them and understand them in a way that nobody else can. I don't have cancer or any other horrible disease. Like someone else said there is always somebody worse off. I can't convince you to change how you feel but I do not believe it is OK for you to say that all aspies who are happy are delusional or one in a million, because that is bull! Every person decides for themselves how they feel about their circumstance. There are people dieing who decide to live their last days in happiness instead of bemoaning their situation, it is all a persons perception just like how some supper rich people who have everything but live in misery. You have a choice to make about how you feel, but do not bring down the people who chose to be happy with you.

^ I was going to post that.

I like being the way I am. I like that I'm not dependent on other people for my happiness. Knowledge makes me feel happy. I've had friends that were so dependent on being around other people, and I felt really bad for them. They would get depressed if they couldn't be around other people every day, and they'd be on their computer talking to multiple people on msn all the time. Not to mention they always need to be dating someone or they feel lonely. I like that I can be satisfied by myself.

Comparing oneself to other people will make anyone unhappy.

schizophrenia is a close second though.... its the only other ill ness that can completely cut you off from the world around you. i have the double downer of the luxury of both but my aspergers is very mild and any form of schizophrenia is always severe. what i mean is my schizophrenia disables me more than my aspergers!

Once upon a time, I hated the fact I had Asperger's. I wanted to be normal and I felt it was making my life miserable. So Mom would tell me I could have something worse like I could be crippled or be like my old friend who has Down's Syndrome or be like my aunt Karen who has Schizophrenia so Asperger's is better and also the fact it could be worse if I had it very badly so having very little of it is better.

But I am just happy with who I am even if I feel down sometimes about myself. I just accept my anxiety and learning difficulties too and not whine about it and be all miserable about having them. I have no reason to hate having AS since I am happy with my life, I'm married and I have a job and I don't live with my parents. My husband accepts me for who I am and is very flexible so nothing about me makes him miserable. Sure there are things he doesn't like about me but there are things I don't like about him but I think everyone has things about themselves people don't like and it's impossible to have a partner and not have things about him or her you don't like. Besides socializing and friendships are over rated.