Talking to oneself.
I'm wondering whether the habit of talking aloud to oneself when alone (or even in the presence of other people, but not talking to them) is common with those with Asperger's or autism.
I'm embarrassed to admit that I do this, sometimes at great length and in great detail; I am in effect thinking aloud. It is a monologue, not a dialogue between two imaginary parties or points of view. I have done this all my life, I think from early childhood onwards, and probably can't break this habit now. I scrupulously avoid doing it in the hearing of anyone else, and on odd occasions if I am overheard by someone who was closer than I thought, it is acutely embarrassing. But other than these occasional aberrations, I believe no-one at all is aware that I do this regularly.
I used to sometimes eat at a particular café, and at a table nearby there often used to be a man who always sat by himself, and constantly talked to himself in a kind of mumble. I couldn't usually hear what he was saying, but wondered if it would make any sense if I did. And it may sound prejudiced, but I was kind of vaguely repelled by him, although I had to tell myself I shouldn't be, just because he did something unconventional, this being something I also did, the only difference being that I did it in complete privacy, whereas he seemed unconcerned about doing it in front of other people. (I am sure he knew other people were around.) No doubt this was because I don't really accept the practice as normal, and thus, although I feel compelled to do it, I keep it very secret.
How many others here do this, and are they embarrassed or self-conscious about it? Do they do it in the presence of other people?
For that matter, do "normal" people do it a lot more often than we might think, but just (like myself) do it only alone? After all, if they do it only alone, we'd never find out they do it, and might get the idea (possibly erroneously) that "normal" people don't do this.
Any thoughts on this?
Regards, Michael.
I've been talking to myself (or thinking out loud) my whole life. I usually do it when no one is around, but on rare occasions, I'll think out loud in front of others and not realize it. I'm not sure if it is because of Asperger's, or if I get it from my mom, who happens to think out loud VERY often.
mikemmlj
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All the time, when I'm alone. I suppress it when I am around others. It's not that I'm talking to myself particularly, or answering voices or anything like that.
Often I am replaying events to figure out what *really* happened. Other times I am rehearsing the permutations and possibilities that may come about in an anticipated conversation.
Sometimes I am imagining myself in another person's life situation and I do this to try to empathize with that person, and in doing so "you" gets switched for "I", and often this goes with trying to figure out what *really* happened. I can do empathy, but I have to put a lot of work into it.
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A boy and his dog sometimes talk to each other
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SpongeBobRocksMao
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I talk to myself sometimes, but usually only when I am on my own. What's weirder is when I'm watching SpongeBob, I'll actually say all the quotes.
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When I am alone and anxious or stressed, I talk aloud sometimes because it helps me focus on what I am doing. I have Aspergers and ADHD.
I ask myself questions and answer them and I give myself instructions, rambling on, something like:
"So where would I have put the passport photos? Did I actually put them somewhere, or did I take them out of my wallet? I did take them out, then I put them on that pile to be sorted. But I sorted the pile, so I must have put them somewhere. How would I have thought about this, I don't have a place for photos, but... I DO have a place for passports, so... wait! I know! They are with the passports! Yessss! OK... Right, dishes done, now fold the laundry, because if you do that, there will be space on the bed for you to put the papers there, then you can sort out the papers! Cool! First, music, music, music. No, not that, not that. Mozart Requiem."
I also sometimes write to-do lists for myself and off them, subvocalising.
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When I must wait in a queue, I dance. Classified as an aspie with ADHD on 31 March 2009 at the age of 43.
ColdBlooded
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I used to talk to my bike when I was little >.<
anyway yes, all these posts above me are really familiar, I always talk to myself, even sometimes in public situations, while biking and also when having a school tests (maths especially, I hate maths) people used to make comments about it. I really hate it when I'm talking in myself while biking and I notice to late that someone is passing me by.
Strangely I find it relaxing though, it helps me setting things straight or rethinking my actions.
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(I seem to have a habit of talking a lot about myself in the WP topics, sorry for that.)
Yes, I soliloquize a lot. I'm not diagnosed with AS yet but I strongly suspect I have some kind of autism as I seem to fit a lot of the criteria.
Often it's as if there are two "people" in my head, one that comes out with ideas, and another who questions those ideas, checking them out for flaws. It's not an internal conflict......think Mulder and Scully - the believer and the sceptic working in harmony to arrive at a rigorous conclusion. Nor is it "split personality" or a dissociative condition - I'm perfectly aware that it's all me, I don't keep finding myself in strange places wondering how I got there, and I know it's not God. I reckon it's got a lot to do with my interest in science - you can't do a good scientist a better service than to try to knock holes in his/her hypotheses.....good scientists try to prove themselves wrong so that only the theories that stand up to this process get any resources spent on them.
I don't do this dialogue thng all the time, just when I feel it's appropriate, though I probably try to apply the scientific method to more of life than the average person. And I suppose I could do all this without speaking any of the thoughts out loud, but I prefer to voice them because it feels so much clearer. When I'm in the laboratory I may be trying to keep count of a large number of test tubes as I add various chemicals to them, so I'll say the numbers of the tubes out loud as I work - simply thinking them isn't always strong enough to keep the number in my consciousness and memory, especially when there are audible distractions.
I find that voicing my thoughts is generally a good way of making them "stronger" - I also do the echolalia thing where if somebody asks me a question I'll repeat it out loud to strengthen it in my mind and to help me remember it for long enough to "get" what they're asking. I've occasionally offended people by doing this - they sometimes seem to think that I'm doing it to criticise them, but it's not that at all, it's just my way of focussing on what they've said. I don't usually voice my thoughts when typing though - perhaps having the thoughts in front of me like that in black and white does the same job as speaking them.
If I were completely alone I'd probably never have a single thought that I didn't say out loud. I've had a lot of embarrassing moments when I've thought I was alone and then realised that somebody has heard me talking to myself. That's often happened in corridors and on streets. I'm getting better at keeping a lookout for people coming into earshot, but I still have the occasional accident. It's very annoying because I don't like having to dull my thinking by forcing it into silence. Often I'm reduced to whispering quietly and keeping my mouth from moving, but that's awkward because I can't then pronounce some of the consonants.
While cycling I noticed that I often silently overtake pedestrians who aren't talking to themselves - I deduce from that observation that most people don't need to talk to themselves like I do.
My favourite comment on this was when an old lady heard me and mistakenly thought I was talking to her - I said that I was just talking to myself, and she replied "well, you'll never find a better listener." She got that one right. And it's nice when somebody's non-judgemental like that and reassures me that they don't think I'm weird.
Ambivalence
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I talk to myself when alone, and I sing to myself a lot. Sometimes I speak nonsense stream-of-consciousness stuff aloud, or (generally when I'm annoyed at something) start to speak or sing sentences aloud in very strange tones. Occasionally I do this in front of other people, it's embarassing and I know it annoys people.
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I do it all the time when alone in my room. But my mom wants me to try and minimize it b/c I am going to college this fall & should try not to disturb my suite mate.
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fiddlerpianist
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I talk to myself all the time. But I suppress it around other people. It helps me to concentrate and organize my thoughts. Otherwise its just a big jumble in my head.
Its interesting reading HOW other people talk to themselves. Personally, I talk to myself like I am having a conversation with someone else. Never really asking any questions, but more like making statements and describing things.
But one of my major problems is being able to take the jumbled up mess of thoughts and feelings in my head and putting them into words. Its usually not too bad when I'm alone. But when I'm around other people it gets a lot worse. So I end up not talking and I can't really carry on a conversation with anyone. It helps if people ask me direct questions that I can answer.
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