best coping strategies

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hi there,

I am reading these forums quite a while, but I still don't know any general strategy aspies should tryout to cope with the increased stress and anxiety we have to cope with. Maybe the best one is meditation, but I don't know, and didn't tryout. Is there no general consensus how an aspie should cope best?

thanks
anton

I only strongly suspect I have Asperger's (I come up positive on all online tests so far), but I will state that for me, meditation was very helpful, and also Tai Chi.

The only problem for me with Tai Chi was learning the movements because I don't have an easy time imitating body motion, but since it's a slow motion art, I was able to get it with a patient teacher. I also think it was helpful for my physical balance.


For meditation, I've tried TM. Also one easy meditation learning technique from my former teacher is to sit with your eyes closed, and count backwards. Don't let your mind drift, and if it does, start counting again from the beginning.

Sorry, I should probably elaborate:

The backwards counting meditation is done in your head, not out loud. You can start at 10 or 50 or 100 - whatever level your concentration is at.

Count slowly and see the numbers in your mind's eye. See the numbers in any way your mind sees them. Breathe slowly, but naturally. Sit comfortably.

The whole idea of the counting is to clear your mind of any other thoughts; and this counting exercise is a technique to learn how to use more advanced meditation techniques, but it is a beginners' meditation itself.

I think it depends on the individual, really. I can speak only for myself. In general, my way to get along is to learn, to forgive, to approach things with as little bias as I can at the moment, to be stubborn / persistent / persevering at finding solutions for a) seemingly easy tasks that are frightening when you're trying to get to them b) tasks that are not at all easy at first glance but you are determined that you can and will finish. It's not a bad thing if you can feel confident and trust yourself. Sometimes a person who acts as your mentor can be a huge help. It can also be called counseling, (life) couching, a good friend's advice, etc.

My anxiety level improves when I can talk to friends and good acquaintances enough times. We discuss many interesting topics (including my special interests) and in the end I don't feel that alone. For me, friendships develop slowly, they require years to bond, but they worth it. I have to put on a bit of facade, though, and mimic the style of the communication to an extent like a chameleon, and sometimes I have to endure a bit of rudeness, but I can take it, I get more from these relationships.

Music is by far the best method I've found for myself to reduce stress and anxiety, but I doubt it would work quite as well with everyone.

Although I'm listening to rock and roll as I write this, I couldn't listen to it at work; I'd find it very distracting. About a year ago I discovered that symphonies that are strictly instrumental from the Romantic composers (e.g., Brahms, Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, Wagner) actually improve my concentration and calm me if I play them softly at work.

Has anyone heard of Dr. Jeffrey Thompson? He's created many audio recordings for healing and relaxation.

I have the 2 CD set called "Theta Meditation System", and I usually find it relaxing when I'm at work. It's not music for pleasure listening (not like classical music), but it claims to have pulses that balance your brainwaves for relaxation. Headphones are a must though.


If you're curious, this is the description from their marketing info:

PROGRAM 1: RENEWAL - EEG
studies of meditators in this mid-theta state show increased abilities to handle stress, heightened intuition, and an enhanced sense of emotional balance.

PROGRAM 2: INSIGHT
Within this state of deep theta, you can connect with your deepest sources of intuitive understanding and healing, gain access to a larger view of your life, and find clarity about your present circumstance

For music that can heel / help you to relax, try Carbon Based Lifeforms, recommended by ScientistOfSound:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAMGbsVc ... r_embedded

Though it's not everyone's bread and butter, I like early Pink Floyd very much (well, not everything, but some of their music is the finest drug to me...). From classical music, try impressionists (Fauré, Debussy, Ravel) and Mozart.

This reminds me a bit of the Theta CD, except that's it's better (free - online)
Thank you OJani.

I agree, it can be different for different people.

There are many things which I use including self-CBT (I mean, I can't afford an expert psychologist, so I do my own CBT). DBT (which is a therapy for people with extreme mood fluctuation) is also good. It's about what they call 'mindfulness'.

But also, medication is very important to me (risperidone, lamotrigine, big dose of long-acting methylphenidate so I can think straight and see more options. I seldom take the risperidone now, because I am pretty stable now.

Also, good relationships with MUTUAL understanding help (OK, I know we're on complicated territory now).

Extreeeeemely important to deal with sensory problems too, and to do EVERYTHING to prevent sensory and cognitive overload.