Tell me your story if you have improved your own functioning

Post Reply New Topic

For this one, I actually don't care if you have a diagnosis or not, but I want to hear from people who were at one point impaired socially and in daily living, and now feel that they are functioning normally or at least significantly better. (I hope there are some people like this here.)

Tell me your whole story, well, briefly if you can: How did your problems come about when you were young? What were your specific symptoms and problem situations? How did it get better or worse on its own? What formal and informal treatments did you try? Which ones worked? In what ways did you manage to improve your functioning? What advice would you give to your formal self?

I know there are probably posts similar to this, but I wanted to ask my own specific questions.

Since I want to help myself, I am particularly interested in how people have improved the symptoms which I am primarily experiencing, which are causing my social/living impairments:
-Strong need for privacy and time to myself
-Being so focused on certain activities that I don't like leaving them to do something else
-Dislike of loud places and other situations, so that I don't enjoy many of the activities/places my peers enjoy
-Lack of motivation to follow, and contempt for, social conventions/rules (especially the ones I find to be unhealthy or harmful)
-Upon initiating social contact, I don't seem to "click" with people and develop into friendships the way others do
-Hatred of lying, deceiving, and altering myself to be more socially acceptable (which I see as all equivalent)

The goal is just to function. I want to be able to complete the tasks of independent living (involving social contact) without feeling uncomfortable. I want to be able to reap the benefits of having friends. I want to have partners for my favorite activities. I want to learn how to connect the way everyone else does.

Any kinds of constructive replies are welcome.

First step, find a therapist who specializes in work with people who have Aspergers, tell him or her the social issues you want to work on.

Wanting to work on your issues is half the battle.

I am in the process of all this, no therapist yet, my son is still interviewing them. And it is for my son, not me. He says he is ready to work on his social issues, I hope he means it. He sounds exactly like you, same issues.

I personally think it is too difficult to resolve these issues on your own, because then you are in a closed loop and you have no idea how you are coming across to the NTs. You live in NJ and there is an organization in the NE region that can probably give you a lot of contacts:

grasp.org

Good luck!

lastnightilie, I identify with these feelings very much. So far in my life, the only way I have been able to get past them is to literally force myself to. I know that doesn't seem like the best strategy. I long for something more genuine. It feels like I am acting, every day of my life. But I figured out eventually that if I wanted to have some type of human experience, this is what I had to do.

I pray every night. I also write a daily (private) journal where I'm free to express my true feelings and thoughts, which may not be accepted by the rest of the world. These two things help me keep in touch with where I am in my journey.

Often I retreat back to those feelings you mentioned. Sometimes I have to ask for help. Sometimes I feel like giving up or starting over, but I know I can't do that.