What are YOUR symptoms?

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Here are mine:

-Can't form interpersonal relationships - as in, can have limited conversations or do things together with others, but can't form a socioemotional bond with people.

-Have no interested in sharing opinions or feelings with other, but do enjoy others' company. When I was a child, I approached others and played with others, and talked to them, but never had 'interpersonal relationships'. Same applies for my entire life. 2/3 of all the conversations people have seem to be sharing opinions on trivial subjects (ex: other people, art, music, etc). I have no interest in such conversations and they make me sick.

-Punch things like walls, windows, shelves, tables, etc. when angry/frustrated. Sometimes punch my head, or tear my hair out when very angry.

-Can't relate to people at any level at all.

-Can't read body language, except for the most obvious stuff like crying, laughing, etc.

-Don't have a sense of identity/personality/character, or whatever that's supposed to mean. Never had this sense or feeling. Only knew that it existed when I heard some people talking about it.

-Enjoy making 'ret*d' noises, screaming out random phrases, rolling on the floor, moving my body parts, clapping my hands, etc.

-Acting 'immature' and 'silly' for my age despite having above average intelligence.

-Get overwhelmed by even very slight 'pressure'.

-Moderate insomnia.

-Often unintentionally do things to which the society reacts negatively, without realizing it would.

-Often find things funny which the vast majority doesn't. Often laugh at inappropriate times.

-Very often spend my time 'in my own world', to the point of blocking off the external stimuli. I usually 'go out' of my world when preoccupied with my interests, though.

-Don't know most social rules (ex: when to say hi, when not to, when to say bye, when not to, when to approach, when not to, when to do this, when to do that, when not to do this, when not to do that, etc).

-More, which I probably don't realize.

There was this grid of symptoms common in females with aspergers I about 80% relate to, but I can't find it. Does anyone know which I mean?

I'm pretty mild but..

- anxiety (dizziness feeling mainly)
- sensory problems (sounds and heights, sunlights) - nothing too major, but dizziness can overtake me when far too much going on.
- faux pas (a real problem in the office at times)
- telephones (the ring, answering and dealing with people)
- dealing with groups of people - I tend to go mute or into a monologue.
- interrupting people (terrible on the phone)
- organisation (tend to get overwhelmed and procrastinate)
- I can't maintain friendships.
- tendency to self medicate (alcohol, past substance abuse) - nothing major, I've never allowed myself to become addicted to anything except nicotine.

There are plenty of other things, but those are what interferes with my life the most. I do have a good job, married and kids. But the truth is I need the support of my wife to live properly. This might sound really bizarre but if my wife wasn't there, I'd be living in squalor and bankrupt.

Jason

Tell me more about this. Curious.

Basically putting my foot in it. E.g. Telling a female colleague that a now retired manager had a sexual interest in her in a crowded meeting room.

In some ways being too honest, I don't even know how that came up, but it did. People don't want to know these things and my comments could have been deemed sexual harassment in itself,

Jason

This one? Female Asperger's Traits

That's the one! Thanks.

*not being able to consistently think clearly and logically
*exaggerated startle reflex
*odd prosody/stilted rhythm of speech, alternating monotonic/sing-song quality
*zig when everybody else zags, and vice-versa
*no expression/reception/comprehension of body language
*being "the thing that wouldn't leave"
*not being able to tell what somebody is thinking until it becomes obvious with angry words
*general awkwardness/clumsiness/lack of proprioception/lots of self-inflicted owies from unintentionally bumping into things
*dodgy memory

probably there are others but the last one i listed encapsulates why i can't think of 'em in time to be writing this stuff down.

(1) I am unable to relate to people.
(1a) I have difficulty understanding conversations that are not literal (in speaking. In writing, I have a reasonable grasp of metaphor if I have time to think about it)
(1b) I have difficulty connecting with emotions other people are experiencing; difficulty knowing how people want me to react to things they tell me.
(1c) I have a difficulty understanding other people's intentions and often misjudge them completely.
(1d) I have a strange sense of humor that is sometimes interpreted incorrectly by other people; I cannot express sarcasm very well, and have a hard time understanding it at times.
(1e) I have difficulty focusing on more than one thing at a time (if there are too many people around, I act like a complete idiot or basically shut down and seek a place to hide).

(2) Sensory issues.
(2a) Sensitivity to light; too many flashing lights gives me a migraine and distracts me (attention disruption).
(2b) Sensitivity to sound; I can tune a guitar or a violin by ear, without a reference. However, I cannot remain in a noisy environment for more than a few minutes without becoming a nervous wreck.
(2c) Sensitivity to touch; certain fabrics irritate my skin, causing me to scratch affected areas until blood is drawn (sometimes -- I avoid fabrics that bother me, now). I'm not allergic to any of the fabrics - the textures just irritate me for some reason.

(3) Stimming (I don't know how relevant this is, but I've spent a long time charting it due to my own curiosity, and I'm not sure if what I do is actually stimming, or if it's just weird ).
(3a) Flapping hands (I have this weird thing I do where I slap my thumb against my forefinger, which I can only do with my right hand -- trying to do it with my left hand annoys me because I don't get the same effect).
(3b) Running fingers through my hair or rubbing fuzzy surfaces for tactile sensation. I think when I was younger, I used to shred pencil erasers by tearing at them with my fingernails, and I imagine it got a similar effect.
(3c) Twitching muscles constantly (whatever the muscles right beneath the knees are called - I twitch them all day long, nearly every minute or two, as well as the muscles connecting my upper and lower arms). I have done this for as long as I remember, and I'm told I did it as a small child as well. My parents at one time actually thought I might have epilepsy, from what I'm told, but like good parents, they didn't bother to take me to a doctor for it. I also gyrate my hands a lot to crack the joints and will repeat the same motion over and over.

(4) I have a number of intense interests that dominate much of my free-time.

(5) I'm fascinated by numbers and I love statistics (I dislike how statistics are used in some cases, though).

(6) I am put at ease by having a strict schedule, and when that schedule is disrupted, I get irritable.

(7) I go from being intensely serious, to being extremely immature and excitable.

There are probably more, but these are what come to mind immediately. Oh, and I enjoy charting things and making lists.

Last edited by kestrel on 19 Feb 2012, 7:02 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I also identify with an overwhelming number of the traits listed in the link I posted above. I particularly like this one, because it's verbatim what I've described on my own: Hates injustice and hates to be misunderstood; this can incite anger and rage.

I never took full notice of all my 'oddities' until I started dating my boyfriend, who frequently misunderstood some of my behavior, which led me to feelings of rage that I'd never experienced in my life. Up until dating my boyfriend, nearly every person I knew could say they'd never seen me angry a day in my life. Don't get me wrong, my boyfriend also makes me the happiest I've ever been, but being close to someone means not being able to hide all of your AS traits the way you do with casual friends and acquaintances.

I'm the same, particularly with that point as well. I've been told I'm very passionate about my beliefs to the point where if I see something I think is bad I'll get very angry and rant out about it until I'm told to calm down. In the slightest thing. For example, I'm a feminist, and if I see something like an advert on TV that's selling some kind of food and there's a scene of a man sitting at a table, reading a newspaper, and a woman making the dinner... I'll just blurt out "WHY DOES THE PERSON IN THE KITCHEN HAVE TO BE FEMALE?!" I also rant angrily when I find the slightest thing unfair or prejudice or whatever. Where something could bother someone a bit or not at all, it'd bother me A LOT. I'm constantly shouting at the TV. People see things as the 'norm' to the point where they don't notice how unfair it can be, and that annoys me so much.

I also identify with the feelings of rage towards people who misunderstand something. I don't have a lot of patience and I get snappy, even when I don't mean to be. I get upset afterwards if the person reacts badly to it.

I have one trait that stands out:

Obsessiveness/Special Interests

Hmm, let's see:

1) Stimming. A LOT but able to conceal it on the job.
2) Needing routines to feel comfortable, especially at work.
3) Problems relating (beyond some small talk) with the opposite sex.
4) Too much concrete/literal interpeting other people's words.
5) Spending too much time on Autopilot when I'm off in my head somewhere.
6) Almost reliving past memories which sometimes leads to talking to self.
7) Hyper-sensitive to some sounds..
Panic/anxiety when feeling crowded by people
9) Tending to get stuck on one subject in normal conversations with Co-workers.
10) Almost pathological honesty. Nearly having meltdown when my word is questioned.
11) Meltdowns (rare but to occur) & Shutdowns( also Fortunately rare but do happen).
12) Difficulty with motor skills. Ie, still unable to tie my bloody shoelaces the "proper" way.

Sincerely,
Matthew

I cannot even summarize my symptoms because they just change with circumstances. Also, the more I think about cognitive profiles the more confused I am, specifically when I try to summarize them in abstract ways like telling the difference between the two hemispheres or the difference between thinking and shifting attention or between concious and automatic processes or that between tasks requiring only one skill or that requiring a synthesis of skills, etc.

Listing symptoms is pointless because they can only disappear when the underlying problem is either gotten rid of or situations which worsen it are avoided. Unfortunately I have not been very successful at finding root causes because trying to extract conclusions from a symptom in one circumstance does not lead to any precise summary.

The only consistent symptom I have had is that my social interactions, however limited, have never been as abysmal as my short term memory.

Well...

Using that female aspie chart

Everything in column A

About half of column B (particularly self-taught reading, strong interest in computers, high education but changes mind with study, not good with social scene)

About 90% column C. (though I don't think I'm emotionally immature. I also don't like sharing feelings. I don't like taking meds and often try to ride out headaches and migraines. Everything else sounds right. Not prone to public meltdowns either, I shut down sometimes but I don't do temper tantrums. Strongly agree with the hating injustice and being misunderstood. This did cause a few tantrums when I was younger.)

And just about all of column D.

More too, but nobody really wants to read this anyhoo

Man, I feel you on that one! Combine that with the anxiety I feel about the skepticism that I feel I'm likely to elicit when talking about the idea, and my powers of recollection fly right out the window.