obsessed with Death and dying

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My 13yr old son never stops talking about death, when he was younger all he would say was that he wanted to die.

Today he was off school because he was ill and again the his topic of conversation was about death. He is now on the internet checking how to destroy humanity. When he was been assessed I said that he didn't have one obsession like cars, aeroplanes etc but now I think he does and its Death.

He constantly talks about it daily, at times he gets very low and threatens to kill himself, I had to take him to the psychiatrist recently because he was threatening to hang himself and tried to use the dogs leash to do this and also produce knife and threaten to cut his wrist and throat.

The psychiatrist said he is been attention seeking, we have had a number of these scary incidents which are worrying. When this happens I arrange an appointment with the psychiatrist they always reassure that all is ok I don't understand how this behaviour is ok and wondering if anyone experience this and how to deal with it. He always says he is going to kill himself and wants to die this I can manage but when he tries to harm himself I don't know what to do and I am not getting any advice from the psychiatrist other than its behavioural.

For a while now he is also obsessed about vampires and he wants to be one he also wants to go to the moon. I have had all the talks about death with him, when he hears someone has passed away, he always says its unfair why its not him because he wants to die and the person probably didn't. My sister has terminal cancer and he said again he feels sorry for her but wishes it was him as again he wants to die.

I was hoping as he got older this would cease but its getting worse not better. I have said that he does get stressed out at school but I have managed to get the school to make changes but nothing seems to be working.

It certainly sounds more serious than that.
I wouldn't know what to suggest but I'm sorry to hear it - I tried to kill myself shortly after turning 14 due to anxieties with school and peers.

Does he seem at all depressed, or is he just obssessed with dying?

death what a topic. i truely enjoyed shelly kagan's philosophy of death at yale. i had simaler problems when i was your sons age mainly because i've had a rough life. all in all he should grow out of it i did. also i studied mortuary science.

Perhaps tell him that one day he will die just like everyone else, so there is no need to do it himself.

If he is down and not happy with his life then find out why that is? If he is just obsessed with the notion of death then explore it with him but in a rational and scientific way.

I was once obsessed with death but I got over it. I think its natural for most kids whether autistic or not to have a "death" phase.

This is not a death phase, its been going on for years progressing all the time. If he is obsessed with death I can deal with this and we have talk and talked. I tell him all the time that he will die one day.

Its the threatening and attempting self harm and thinking how to do it what worries me the most, I hope it is something he will grow out off. He could also unintentionally hurt himself when I say this to him he says he doesn't care he wants to die anyway. When I am driving he will says things like hit the wall I keep saying that I don't wish to die. If I have a near miss or ask him not argue it dangerous same response.

He mood changes often up and down and very low at times maybe depressed.

He sounds like he is simply seeking attention.

Maybe but today he had all my attention as it was only me and him, I have often gone away alone with him for weekends he is involved in sports and the same conversation, wanting to die and death. He would be anxious about the sport event.

Maybe its when he is stressed out and it the only way he can express himself?

Well I only said it could be because he is attention-seeking because when I was 10-13 I was always saying I wanted to off myself so I could get a rise out of my mom. Maybe he really is sad, or maybe he just gets spontaneous depression from events that are stressing? Just inferring, although I'm not much of a shrink so don't take my advice to heart.

Trying to hang oneself with a dog leash sounds like a little more than simple attention seeking behavior. I hate how people try to dismiss that there are adolecents/teens who are at risk for suicide and are depressed that belief does more harm than good.

I agree, he probably is sad but he might of been acting you never know...

Wow... that's scary. Are you sure he isn't depressed?

Well I am thinking depressed, usually people don't attempt suicide because they feel a little sad.

I would take your son more seriously than the psychiatrist especially if the psychiatrist has him on drugs that could perhaps increase such thoughts as they care more about money than your child. You care about your child more.

If it is drugs, wean him. If he's being bullied at school, help him. If something bad is going on at home, do something about it.

What if he weren't seeking attention and actually did it. There is no erasing that.

He attends CAMHS here in Ireland its a free services for children, I have taken him privately I live in Ireland and the only service for children is the above. There is only one private child psychiatrist in the country crazy he lives a 4 hour drive there and 4 hours back.

He diagnosed him and then referred him back to CAMHS I need support locally and this is what is available other then A&E if things get very serious.

He does take medication straterra for ADHD and prozac for OCD traits just recently. Off medication things are not good and his death wish becomes more difficult to manage.

He has complained about been bullied at school but they seem to be one off incidents that we deal with immediately. He does find the school environment very stressful and we are working on this.

He lives with me his mum and dad and sister in a secure home and we do all we can to help him he also has AS. I have advocated for him tirelessly we had a serious battle to get his diagnosis as he can mask his difference this has caused so much stress for all of us as a family. But he still seems so unhappy and sad school is a big factor here I have offered home schooling he wants to continue with school despite the stress.

This is why I am just lost with him wanting to die and not sure how to deal with it.

It's withdrawal. You'll need to wean him off with professional advice. People who have had thoughts of suicide while on these drugs have carried them out either while on them or through the withdraw phase. This isn't attention this is a warning.

Your psychiatrist is not going to be held responsible if he goes through with it. He will blame the aspergers and social problems.