I have a hard time accepting compliments

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I find that when I recive a compliment I do feel good about my self for a little while and it works like a drug then I get all pissed off and do somthing wrong.

Socially I have no idea what to do when I receive them, so they throw my off, and I know what you saying about how they can get you a bit arrogant, causing you to stop being careful and then goofing.

Only times I can remember being complimented is when I was compared by my friend to Carl Sagan, and when i got good reviews for a sketch I wrote years ago that was used in a high school revue(that I missed), and when I get told I'm a good writer. I guess compliments have an different effect, it makes self-worth seem to go up(though it does go down later.). I don't know what I'm talking about now.

you could work on realizing that you are a good person who deserves compliments. try writing a list of ten good things about yourself. read over it every day until it becomes second nature to think good things about yourself. then when you do get a compliment, just say, "thank you" and go home and add it to your list.

what other people think of us - good or bad - isn't so important that it should cause an emotional roller coaster.

My therapist told me to just say thank you and it's ok to give a mild reciprocation to establish a sense of social connection. In some cases, a person may compliment you because they like you, at which point you will have to compliment them back if you are also interested in them. If you are not interested in them, it is best to avoid complimenting them back, lest you make them believe that you are interested in them. I wish that I had known all of these things when I was dating people without knowing that I was dating them.

I never know what to say. Just saying "thanks" sound weird. I have no idea why. I usually just mumble a grunt or something.

For some reason if I'm given a compliment by my wonderful girlfriend I assume she wants something or wants me to do something I don't like doing! Same with friends and family I assume they are after something!

I feel really awkard if a stranger or someone I don't know very well compliments me and I just blush like a big red plum and say nothing!! !

When people compliment me I can't really take it as genuine. I just wonder if they want something from me or want to manipulate me in some way. Or I wonder if they are going to hold it against me. Sometimes people give compliments, but they mean it as an attack.

But if it is genuine I feel uncomfortable with that too. I don't know what to say.

I've had to learn how to take a compliment, since I do a lot of stage acting and karaoke singing. My standard reply is along the lines of "Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it." Sometimes that leads to further conversation, sometimes not.

Mostly I like compliments. They help with my self-esteem. I usually just smile and say ''thanks'' or just ''yes'' or something.

But too many compliments can sometimes embarrass me. This is why I don't want to change my hairstyle. It's because I just know every woman I see would be saying, ''I like your new hairstyle, your hairstyle looks nice, you look much older with that nice hairstyle, you should do X or Y with it.....'' and so on, and it irritates me.

When I was incarcerated in an all-girls' Catholic High School back in the Olden Days when nuns were terrifying, we had an Etiquette teacher named Miss Howe. (There, I've thoroughly dated myself!) She was... pretty loopy, but she did teach me/us one invaluable lesson I've never forgotten, and that was, how to accept a compliment or a gift without feeling that anything is owed to the giver. A wide smile and a gracious, "Thank you so very much!" -- which she made us practice with each other -- was all it took. I think that just being told that thanks and even a practiced smile were Sufficient And Correct did me a world of good! She told us that one of the biggest mistakes we could make was always thinking we owed people, for every little thing they did. It was a very refreshing thing to hear, especially since the psychotic nuns we had were forever teaching us otherwise!

I've read that trouble accepting compliments is a very common AS trait. I used to have extreme trouble with it, and would end up saying self-deprecating things in response because I just was so caught off guard and unsure of how to respond, but I have confidence now (something I've worked really hard to achieve) so I no longer have this issue in as extreme of a way.

whoa yes, thats my shoe

Did you ever come across situations where someone was giving you compliments just to butter you up and it was not really sincere? If so, did it trigger a lack of trust for most compliments?

That's how it is for me. I don't trust them because it's hard to tell when people are being sincere. Sometimes the compliment itself *is* sincere but the person still wants something for it.

I wonder are they going to expect me to do something different because they complimented me? like they want to be closer to me or something? are they going to get mad if I don't do whatever it is they want?

My trouble with accepting compliments has always been that I can't imagine that what's being said about me is true, not whether or not the person complimenting me has an ulterior motive. These days, it's easier not to be embarrassed right away, so I accept compliments better when they're given. But I sometimes feel bad later, wondering if the person was just being nice or if they really were mistaken about me. If I think they were mistaken, I feel like a faker who might one day be discovered, causing people to be angry when they realize the truth.

I think this kind of thing goes hand-in-hand with my reaction of fear when someone is expressing sympathy and other ways in which I don't interpret people very well. My above statement may make it seem as though I feel really bad about myself, but that's not accurate. I do think I'm good at some things and that I'm a decent person, unless I'm in a bad mood. Then I think I'm awful, of course. But even when I'm in a good mood, I can find people's attention disturbing. I'm just more likely to feel it after the fact now, instead of in the moment. I've had times when I've been really entertaining and funny, making people laugh and everything, enjoying every minute of it myself, and then I've felt really strange and vulnerable afterwards. It's sort of creepy.