Mixing with people

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Yesterday I felt like I wanted to talk to people it was weird I actually felt like connecting to another human being (all be it by phone), today I had to go to a creative writing class, the class was fine but the chit chat was just depressing and so boring, on the way home a taxi driver kept asking lots of questions about where I live, what I do, it just felt like the Spanish inquisition and I just did not know the polite way of implying I was'nt in the mood for social small talk.

I'm not ignorant but apart from the information gleaned from the class my day of mixing negatively affected me, where as most people seem to find socialising an energising experience.

To off-put somebody from small talk:

NEVER use five words when one will do.

Do not use complete setences.

e.g. How are you?

'Fine' instead of 'I'm fine' or 'I am' fine.

lean back, feet towards the door.

I find monosyllables are the best way to go, just grunt or make a noise. If they don't stop, your not really participating, and if they do then they got the message.

I think the problem is I worry about offending people, or rather if I offend them will they confront me and that could be scary. I think one needs a stronger backbone!!

Aren't they the ones who are offending you by not respecting your right to choose when and who with which to converse.

I used to train a lot of Bosnians and Croatians at my old job. When people approached my and started in and I didn't want to talk I'd say "No English" and shake my head the other guys laugh the person usually left after that

I've never really considered that before, yes they are the ones being disrespectful and not us.

I sometimes want to chat ,but other times I don't. I really don't like small talk though, that does my head in. It's just, I don't really understand the ultimate purpose of it at all. I know its intended as a conversation starter but its really crap, start a conversation already!

Hear, hear! Small talk makes me nauseous..

It's that they or we are being disrespectful, it's just a culture clash.


I, too, have the opposite experience.

Avoid eye contact, look bored, keep a book with you at all times when travelling.

I do this when I have to travel by train, I can keep to myself if I want to, then if I get the urge to chat, I can just put the book away.

When travelling, always wear earphones.