The autism community is so split, how to bring it together?

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Maybe many people have noticed this split,
Autistic people
Parents
and Professionals
Each act within their own bubbles and don't seem to interact much which causes issues.

How do you think people could best do to bring them together to form a whole?

1. Autistic people want to be left alone.

2. Parents want their kids to be normal. They feel they have to do something.

3. Professionals want money. Can't make money unless they interact with kids.

Bring them together why?

To help autistic kids grow up more understood and supported
To put professionals on the right track of what to do or look into
To calm fears parents start out with

as examples.

Neat, but as an autistic parent of an autitic child, I must protest.
I can't be completely left alone. I need help and I want to contribute. Preferably, on my terms, so I can use my strengths to make up for my impairments.
I don't want my daughter to be "normal". I want her to have a life worth living. I make a lot of effort to build a support network containing specialists agreeing on my goal. They need to be hand picked and checked in advance but they do exist.

So...its not autistic folks who are split amongst themselves. Its autistic folks vs parents vs the mental health professional community.

Wasn't aware that that those groups were opposed to each other.

It depends. Sometimes they do help each other but sometimes they are in opposition. I think the biggest opposition I see amongst these particular groups are when Autistic adults try to advocate for themselves. In my personal experiences and in the experiences of friends of mine who are also Autistic adults without guardians, the opposition we sometimes face is very strong. The problem happens when we get told that we do not know ourselves as well as doctors and parents. We get told that other people know best what is in our best interest even when we find that they do not understand us at all. This is the root of the problem from my perspective.

I am happy to have all groups work together but it can only work if we are respected and if the other groups understand that we do know our own bodies and minds just like they know theirs. They should not question and argue my motives or my intent or the reasons that I do or say things or have meltdowns and other issues. If something is happening to me or if I am processing or perceiving something a certain way, no one has the right to tell me that I am not processing or understanding or perceiving differently than I actually am. And I am extremely self analytical all the time. I have the capability to see myself objectively from a third party perspective. I think a lot of us do that. So for people who do not even know me to try to tell me that I am wrong in how I process or in the things that I neurologically or emotionally or psychologically need, that is not right. If we are to work together successfully, they need to respect us as much as they expect us to respect them.

How are medical specialists 'split' from autistics? How can they possibly be closer? Their job is to diagnose and treat, and that's exactly what they do.

They do come together at various conferences, at point of diagnosis, through various therapies etc, but my intial reaction these days is a little jaded. Too often, I've been a part of groups where parents spew forth their utter contempt and hatred toward "this terrible disease" my child has, and their words, efforts to seek "cure", "treatment" for their child makes me so sad, disillusioned .... Sometimes, you have to take a step back and breathe through what you are faced with from various people who appear "to know not what they do"... I witnessed this when my son was going through diagnosis ... they saw him wrap his arms round my neck(I knew he meant no harm), that he was seeking security, but for them, alarm bells were ringing, as though he might possibly later become "dangerous"... So misunderstood ...

It depends on what kinds of treatments they are dispensing. If you want to "treat" something, you have to actually understand the issue. There are Autistic issues that specialists try to "treat" that do not require "treatment" at all but rather a different understanding and tolerance and acceptance. When a specialist tells me that I need treatment, I often explain why I actually don't. This has actually happened to me many times. When I further explain my perspective and why they are wrong in their approaches, they either understand and agree with me or they become arrogant and defensive and shut down all paths of further communication. At that point I just walk away.

Bringing people together as in like a conference could have both positives and negatives. But, what I deal with the most are NTs thinking they know how every person on the spectrum thinks or feels and generalizes them or that they are an expert of autism because they "read" about it once or twice. I do have an issue sort of with spreading awareness to the masses about ASD. In theory this is a good concept but the problem is most people want to be a part of a movement and really don't understand what is really going on. Unless someone has first hand experience someone can't possibly understand what someone else has to endure. Most of the people I meet at first glance don't know I have ASD because I look what they consider "normal".

Agreed and welcome to WP

Science is going to have to clearly define what Autism is and its cause. Right now the diagnosis is subjective based on observations and questionnaires.

True. It doesn't help either that people change the standard deviation of the spectrum. It is ironic to me that NTs like to tell people with ASD what they should or should'nt be feeling because of something they think they understand.

I'm focused on working toward starting small groups in communities. Mona is as well. We'd like anyone else whose interested in doing this to collaborate with us.

I think we bring autistics together by forming as many small groups of them as possible in their own communities. The groups would share a common bond being associated with a larger autistic self-advocacy organization. The larger organization could work on larger ideas such as giving the small groups ideas and tools to foster greater positive autistic awareness in their own communities.

2 of the 3 you listed are not even autistic.