What are the conversational priorities of the genpopulation?

Page 1 of 1 [ 3 posts ] 

Transhuman
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 6 Aug 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 136

21 Feb 2012, 5:35 pm

It's very hard for me to have a conversation due to the fact that my conversational priorities are very different from those of the general population.
My estimate is that, on average, people spend at least 65% of the conversation time bringing up various irrelevant topics from gossip to TV shows, and share their feelings and opinions on them.

The problem is, I'm not interested in sharing feelings or opinions on anything, unless it touches my personal interests. Whenever there are feeling-and-opinion-on-irrelevant-topics conversations, I feel out of place.


What would you say are the conversational priorities (in terms of time spent on each conversation type) of the general population? Please use the percentage form when expressing the priorities.

Example:
65% - Bringing up irrelevant topics (other people, TV shows, clothing, sports, etc) and sharing feelings and opinions on them
15% - Sharing experiences
10% - Sharing interpersonal feelings
10% - Everything else



sacrip
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Oct 2008
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 844

21 Feb 2012, 8:55 pm

It's difficult to quantify this without a host of other considerations, like where the persons conversing are, the depth of their relationship and the time frame of the conversation. For instance, if I know I only have 5 minutes with the person I'm talking to, I'm unlikely to do in depth into an examination of, say, the impact of modern firearms on socio-economic conditions in Europe. If I'm at work, I'm more likely to discuss work related topics, even if I don't need to know any particular new thing to accomplish my work tasks.

In short, you need to narrow your parameters a bit. Like, "What are topics to broach to a person I meet at a party and have no relationship with in order to maintain a sustained conversation?"


_________________
Everything would be better if you were in charge.


EXPECIALLY
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Oct 2011
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 701

21 Feb 2012, 9:36 pm

You're accurate with your breakdown there, IMO, but that's not going to change.

I think most NTs conversations are about relating to one another more so than sharing information, it's not a bad thing, but I don't always relate to it etiher.

Sometimes I have so little interest in expressing my own opinions and also in the opinions of others that I just stop talking. Not completely, I mean, I speak to the people I have to and when you're employed you can't just stop speaking to your boss and workers but I put a cap on it, because I start to unintentionally offend people otherwise, it's either very obvious that I don't care or I'll say something out of turn because I wasn't listening.

They get offended for thing I find silly, but that's they way it is and I'd rather adjust my behavior and avoid trouble than try to change the majority.

IDK, I agree with what you say but I suggest trying to find people who share the same interests as you and trying to go along as smoothly as possible with others. You could just try to talk about things you think people will find interesting but that's draining and they'll probably see that you're faking it.


_________________
AD/HD BAP.

HDTV...

Whatever.