Generic, inane questions in e.g. job interviews

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Not sure if I'm alone in feeling like I *just cannot* handle them... I mean, what's the point in asking a random person the interviewer doesn't know "what will you offer our company? " - I know the interview is supposed to be about first impressions, getting to know a potential employee... but a rehashed templated answer is knowing jack feces, quite frankly.

I just still cannot handle it even if all I have to do is memorize some good-sounding nonsense and eject it again at the right moment - maybe it's because I don't do drama. And I hate lying. (Oh, but of course, "I will offer you the truth!" is the last answer to that question they want to hear, haha.)

Try pretending that you are playing a part in some improv piece. Or try pretending that you are someone else. Pretend that you are doing one of those "Thirty Days" type experiments. Those are the only suggestions I can think of.

My husband is like that and can't handle the BS questions. He doesn't like the entire interview process at all since it's not really a valid assessment of someone's ability to do the job but more of a social skills/charisma/BS ability assessment.

I recognize this as well but I am capable of just doing what I need to do since that's just how it works.

I know exactly what you mean lol. Unless I have a prepared response it's next to impossible for me to come up with answers to some of the ridiculous questions they may ask. I just try to memorize answers to as many typical interview questions as I can, and then pull bits and pieces from those answers for any other questions they may ask.

I remember the worst I was ever asked, at a recent interview. The question, or statement, was: "Describe a situation where your personal ineptitude has impacted the lives of your classmates or coworkers." I pretty much told the guy that it was a completely ridiculous question lol, there's really no way to answer it other than saying that you are not inept so have never had that experience. I find that these kind of questions are much more common at corporate or large companies (I think it's the human resources people that come up with all this stuff). At smaller companies the questions are usually much more geared towards your actual ability to do the job, such as educational/work experience, skills, etc.

"Once, I couldn't help myself from pointing out that an assignment to describe a situation was ridiculous and had no bearing on my ability to perform assigned tasks. I did not get the job."

Yeah..they want to see how you think outside the box and that type of question you brought up is more about seeing if you will describe what you learned from that process...humility is a virtue and being able to realize your mistakes and learning from them are values companies look for.

They nearly always trot out the same tired clichéd "Where do you see yourself in five years?"

Do you all go to the same school or something? How about a bit of originality?

If I get that line I immediately know I'm going to hate the place.

Job interviews are the worst. There's an unspoken understanding that the questions you're being asked are complete horses**t, but you have to come up with an answer for them anyway. It's very political; it's a game you have to play.

"So, tell me about yourself."

What is this, a date?

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

What's the ideal answer to this question, anyway? Am I supposed to show ambition by saying that I want to be the manager or something? You know where I really see myself in five years? Right where I am at this moment, still getting bent over and violated by life, struggling to get away and failing utterly.

Let's cut the BS, Mr. Manager. I want the job because I want money. Here's what I'm offering you: to come in every day on time, do the work, and go home. You know that loser who never comes in on time and sometimes never shows up at all, and you keep catching him talking on his cell phone when he should be working, but you keep letting him work here for some inexplicable reason? I'll do a better job than that.

So when do I start?

I didn't realise it was autism related, but I have always found it practically impossible to answer vague questions like this.

Even if I had all of the information they could ever possibly desire, without knowing specifically what piece of information they want me to give them, I just can't think of where to begin. It feels similar to what I expect it would feel like to be asked to tell someone absolutely everything you know, about every subject you've ever heard of. RIGHT NOW, ALL IN 5 MINUTES.

And I don't just mean in an interview, but in any question which has no guiding structure.

If asked what I like, for example, I'd need to know which area of my interests they were enquiring about. Are they asking me which movies I like? Which foods? What? And then what genre of movies do they mean? Do they want to know about savoury foods, or desserts? Maybe it's about what I like to eat while watching movies? But then that just presents me with the same mysteries about genre again...

There must be a literally infinite number of potential answers to questions like this. It's impossible to tackle them.

It's no wonder that NTs all just pretend to like the same thing. It must be easier when you keep your list of interests and beliefs short and simple, and rehearse it until it's memorized by heart.

My favorite job interview question ever was "Have you ever smoked marijuana in your life?" I was so surprised by the question, I blurted out "Of course! Hasn't everyone?" I did not get that job.

Me too.

Also with the "where do you see yourself in 5 years" question I am not even able to look that far ahead. I see myself as either exactly the same as I am now or dead.

Are they expecting some kind of correct response? What is the purpose of the questions? What is a good response to "Where do you see yourself in five years?" that will get you the job over others?

This was a nightmare for me also.

A few years ago, I was interviewed for a position in food service at a hospital.

Before this, I have had serveral jobs which I was never interviewed for. Just hired on the spot because someone knew me.

So when I had that interview, I was scared and my mind went blank. I'm also horrible at open ended questions and most of my answers ended up being "I don't know".

It totally sucked.

Yeah, I would have said the same thing.

I get that in day to day conversations too. Things like 'what have you been up to lately'. There's a lot I could say. Or I could boil it down to a word or two. Neither is ever right

The reason they ask " Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" is because they want to see if you are committed to the job your applying too and not thinking of the next promotion/job you would like. Its actually a simple response...you say you have no other objectives in site than the job being presented to you right there and than. They dont want to hear you plan on leaving, or else why interview you in the first place?

A job interview is really a Mind f**k.