Chores as a coping mechanisim.

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Do you find that you have a compulsive need to do Chores all hours of the day? Do you do Chores to make up for the problems that you've had, throughout your Childhood? Do you do Chores to keep your Mind off of your Obsessions, and to block them out of your Head, because your Childhood Obsessions were frowned upon, and every time you develope a new Obsession, you do the Chores, instead of sitting around, all day long, looking at Pictures and Maps of the things that grab your Interests? Do you do Chores as a way of dealing with different Emotions, such as Sadness and Anger, or even yearnings for the Past? Do you do Chores as a method of earning the nice things that you want to buy for yourself, if they're realted to your Current Obsessions? What do you get, out of doing Chores?

I do Chores for at least Two and a Half hours, every single day. I do my Chores, in order to make up for the time that I was Ten and I was looking at Maps of the United States, Five hours, every single day. I'd like to think that things have changed, between my Parents and I, since 1985 when I was Ten, so I do at least Two to Three hours of Chores, every single day, because if I didn't do Chores, I'd be looking at pictures of Routemasters, all day. And it would be pretty much the same of looking at Maps, all day long.

I've mentioned my reason for doing Chores, in the Paragraph, above. Since developing a new Obsession, I've decided to fill a big chunk of my days with Chores. I can do a Brain Excersize that require me to channel all of my Mental Energy into the Tasks that are in front of me. I don't allow myself to think about the Old London, as I know it, until I'm done all of the Chores that I plan to do for the day, and that's the way it is.

I do Chores in order to block out Emotions, related to the way people deal with me, and communicate with me. It's almost like they go out of their way to piss me off, on purpose. Sometimes they do get me angry, on purpose. They holler at me and tell me to stop crying, stop having Pity Parties and to get on with Life. I'm Bloody glad that this Garbage only happens to me, when I'm experiencing PMS. After somebody pisses me off like that, I do as many Chores as I can, in as little time possible, in order to make my entire Body hurt. The thing is, that I enjoy the Body Pains that I give myself, by "Punnishing myself with Physical Work".

On a completley different note, I do Chores to keep my Sentimental Feelings for the Routemaster at bay. Durring the Day, I must keep busy. When it's just Chico and I in my Bedroom and I'm in the final stages of getting ready for Bed, I allow myself to have my Nostalgic Feelings. It's hard to do Chores, when you're feeling Nostalgic.

I also do Chores, because I'm obligated to do them, if I want to buy nice things for myself. It's funny, how I see Buses that are mainly Red, as being classified as "Nice Things", when most Women are into Flowers, High Heels, Perfume and Jewlery. Back to the topic of Chores, It's the hard work that I put into my Daily Chores that make me feel proud, instead of guilty, when I buy myself a "Friend".

The things that I get out of doing Chores, are a stong feeling of dicipline, and a sense of Pride. I see it as Boot Camp for entering the Work Force. I also enjoy the Exersize that Chores provide me with. I find that I build Character by doing House Chores, and it strengthens my Mind, so that I will be able to have a Paid Job, one day in the Future. I also get to convey an exteriour of Power, Strength and Emotional Control.

Is this Healthy for me, or should I put more energy into my Interests?

you like the word chores huh

I do!

I'm not a psychologist, but I just happen to know this random fact (forgot where I heard it from).

People who are usually workaholics are the type of people who try to minimize their emotional pain by doing work or chores. It keeps the person occupied on the work/chore rather than on the emotional pain.

This is healthier than harming yourself, but I suggest you focus on your interests and include some sort of stress reliever. Stress relievers may not be a full-time interest, but it's good for passing time or calming yourself down after a bad day.

Stress relievers can include playing PC/video games, meditation, exercise (some sort of chemicals that relieve you of stress will be produced after you exercise, just another random fact ), etc.

I like to peek into you window watching you do those chores for hours. Will you please get down on all fours and srub the kitchen floor for me tonight please!! !! !! !! !! !! !

I guess I'm lazy I just give my mom cash for the utility bills and do very few
chores. At work (I'm unemployed since I quit April 2005) I tended to work hard.
I know you said your on Paxil. I upped my Paxil dose to 40 mg and my coworker asked was I on "Stacker II"(some otc stimulant diet
drug). Because I was doing so much work!

My wife does chores like this too. She's bipolar, and she had a pretty tough childhood.

It worries me in alot of ways. I feel like if I don't do something to stop it, then I'm taking advantage, because it happens that I am actually kind of bad about doing chores. I worry about her mental health - for a while it actually got out of control, precipitating a stay at the psychiatric hospital (she checked herself in). When it gets bad, it also bothers me because it's alot of chaos that I find difficult to deal with - the noise and the smells of too many chemicals. Finally, the catch-22 of it all worries me - she won't let me help, and I can't get her to stop, but then I feel bad 'allowing' her to keep at it (even though I can't stop it).

"The things that I get out of doing Chores, are a stong feeling of dicipline, and a sense of Pride. I see it as Boot Camp for entering the Work Force. I also enjoy the Exersize that Chores provide me with. I find that I build Character by doing House Chores, and it strengthens my Mind, so that I will be able to have a Paid Job, one day in the Future. I also get to convey an exteriour of Power, Strength and Emotional Control."

That's different than how my other half seems to feel about it. She is distressed when she does it, she's distressed that she can't stop, and she's never happy with the results. She also does alot more than 2-3 hours per day ... more like 5 (when it got bad before her stay at the hospital, it was upwards of 10 hours per day)

I've found that I've been doing chores, again. I'm still doing them to deal with emotions. The causes of the emotions are different, this time. I find that I do chores, when I feel guilty about something that's happened during the day. I've also been doing a lot of chores to dull the feelings of being on my last straw, when it comes to living with my parents, in my Adolecent Home. (We've moved out of my Childhood Home, when I was thirteen). The disorder of the house gets to the point, that it drives me bananas! I've also been sitting at the same table with my folks, for nearly 32 years. That's not right. What's even less right, is that I'm either treated like a Child, or made to feel guilty, or I end up feeling guilty for having a difference of opinion, with them. I start moving out on November 1st. I've been typing out different predictions and scenerios, which are all good, about things that will happen to me in the future, living on my own. When I'm not on WP, or typing out four sets of predictions, I'm busy with chores.

Does anybody else use chores, as a crutch?

Yes...I like to say some people turn to choc, some drink...I clean.

Sometimes when I'm really upset I will choose something very repetitive...like dishes or ironing...it keeps me from meltdown...silly maybe, but it seems to work. Every time my mom would get upset when I was little she would do her ironing...she said it calmed her down...

After all these years...I've become my mother. LOL

I would like to say that I am doing chores However, I have been feeling really overwhelmed by just trying to do the basics - washing, dishes, ect. I think it used to help when I could focus on the chores instead.

I do. When I am mad, frustrated, sad, whatever.... I work it out through physical labor: ie chores or landscaping and gardening if the weather's decent. I get busy, busy, busy and forget about what's bothing me in time. Or it backfires and I end up just even more mad if what's bothering me is that my hubby is lazy and doesn't help around the house much. LOL! But either way, I get stuff done, my house will be in order(one of my ocd issues), I get a decent work-out, and I feel like I've accomplished something. That alone makes me feel better. My biggest problem is that I have a trick hip and associated back problem and a bum ankle that I'm having surgery on next month and I never know when to quit once I get started. A quick clean-up of the kitchen will often result in reorganizing the cupboards which somehow leads to cleaning the garage which somehow leads to rearranging the furniture in my living room by myself. I don't know why I do it, but I seem powerless to stop. It's a terrible compulsion. One I get going, there's no stopping me. My hubby hates when I get like that and REALLY hates when I try to drag him into my compulsion. LOL! I can't blame him.

I like doing chores... well, except ironing. But otherwise - yeah, it's nice to switch off and do something practical and familiar and have a chance to mentally unwind.

I associate chores with my dad standing behind me and yelling in my ear. Not a great association at all... that is why I am lazy by nature; have to FORCE myself to get any work done.

That is a little secret of mine.

So no, Chores aren't a crutch for me, and never will be.

I like doing chores, I find cleaning quite therapeutic and relaxing. I usually do them while listening to music. My favourite thing is cleaning brass, I find it a great stressbuster.

Starr - here's some pictures of nice shiny brass for you:





I share your love of polishing brass

Thanks Sociable Hermit, what wonderful brass...that would keep us happily polishing for days