Help me get over fears of getting diagnosis please?

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Ever since I've been told by a friend that I might have AS a year ago, I've slowly learned to look at myself and see how I interact and treat others (which has helped a lot).

But still, I was very dismissive of the idea and at the current moment, I'm really unsure if I just have serious social anxiety issues or I have AS. I really don't mind having AS (since I've learned to cope with the potential of having it for a year now); it doesn't scare me or depress me or anything. I just NEED to know though if that makes any sense. The ambiguity is bugging the hell outta me.

I have a psychiatrist I can go meet at my college but I need to get a referral from a counselor first. I have NO clue how to tell the person about it since I hardly told anyone about my issue.

Please help!

OK. I'm kindof in the same boat. Why, exactly, are you afraid to be diagnosed? For me, I am just a paranoid person, I guess. If 5 people make annoying sounds around me, it HAS to be because they are around me and they secretly know that I hate that sound.

Like: I've only told like 5 people that I suspect AS. But all of a sudden, it seems like random people are talking about their experiences with friends with AS and how they coped etc....Plus people are being really nice to me and seem to be trying to get me to open up more. It seems to me that either: 1) the people I did tell started a vigorous campaign to get everyone I know to make me start feeling better. OR 2) people somehow all of a sudden began to sense that I couldn't take my anxiety anymore, and started to try engaging me more independently and randomly. I am really starting to suspect #1. In a way, I kinda enjoy seeming to get along with people better. But if they are just humoring me, I don't want any more of it. I need to learn better social interaction skills, not be smiled at for the sake of it.
Also, I am always afraid of what is on my medical record and who has access to it. Call me a conspiracy nut; I don't care. For me, I came to the realization that I perfectly fit the definition, and I was almost asking for an encyclopedia to say my actual name. I don't need an official medical statement to tell me what I feel I already know. I feel it would be a waste of my money, and risk on my privacy. But I could be wrong; who knows.

Just so I don't misunderstand you, are you afraid of receiving (or not) a diagnosis, or afraid of the actual process of trying to get one?

the process is scaring me. just opening up to a person and saying "hey i think i'm socially ret*d and i just figured this out 20 years into my life" to a normal counselor seems an impossible thing to do..

Would it be easier to list the AS symptoms you have on paper, complete with "Asperger's Syndrome" written at the top, and hand it to the counselor? That would get the information on the table without you having to verbalize it out loud. Just tell the counselor that you think you've identified a root cause of your problems but need a referral to the psychiatrist to investigate further.

Edit: better to figure this out at 20 than at 52 like I did