Do people claim that your parents were negligent?

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I haven't gotten this recently, but in my young adult life and definitely in my childhood, I did have the occasional person make uninformed remarks that my parents didn't teach me how to behave, they didn't seem to care about raising me properly, and so forth. Even one fool who was a friend of a friend told me on more than one occasion it's as if I had been raised by wolves.

Most of the time I felt that these remarks were just made in frustrated resignation, as they didn't want to look for a more clinical cause, that wouldn't agree with their entrenched way of thinking. In a minority of cases, they were just bullies trying to manipulate or abuse me.

Such people don't even know my parents, and to their credit, they did the best they could to bring me up right w/o being abusive, as they were more educated & enlightened people. In retrospect, they were firm but fair. So it actually adds insult to injury when people make gross assumptions like that.

Best response I can think of is, "you don't know my parents, and you don't know what it's like to grow up with autism."

Can anyone relate to this experience & recount examples?

I grew up in the 60's. My father was a clinical psychologist & my stepfather was a child psychologist. (Both utter idiots, btw.) I must have heard "you should go see them" a million times.

Are we talking about other people or professionals?

I'm a parent of a child on the spectrum and I've been accused by in-laws of not bringing my daughter up properly. This is despite the amount of times they have witnessed me explaining to my daughter how to respond/behave and her still refusing. I assume I was expected to smack her hard, in front of them, so they could see I was 'teaching' her properly. In actual fact, my daughter is the complete opposite of a ferral child. Every moment in her presence is all about her wellbeing (teaching, including manners, playing, caring, etc). I wouldn't have it any other way, but to be accused of the opposite is frustratingly hurtful.

my parents were always negligent
and it always looked like i was odd one out
no one said anything they would blame my behavior
but ultimately i used to feel a loser because of my parents negligence

When I was a small child (aged between 4 and 7) the headmistress at the school didn't like my mum because she thought that my odd behaviour was because of being neglected or even abused at home (which wasn't the case, but nobody quite knew what was wrong with me at the time). I seemed too ''typical'' for a child to be diagnosed as Autistic or even with ADHD, so they just assumed my odd behaviour came from child abuse or neglectance at home. My mum was happier when I did finally get a diagnosis at the age of 8, because that explained my slightly ''different'' behaviour, and she wasn't thought of as a bad parent after that. She was never a bad parent anyway.