Poll: the ideal aspie living situation

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Without adding in sci-fi/fantasy options, what do you think is the ideal living situation to accommodate aspie-ness with as much comfort as possible?

I picked living alone. That way I have somewhere to go and be alone, and if I want social time I can go out to find it. But always have the home sanctuary.

I picked living alone assuming one can afford it.

It depends on the person.

I'd not function nearly as well living alone. For me, living with my boyfriend and my cat is far better than living alone, or with just my cat. I am far more reliable about things like eating this way.

I agree that this would differ per person, and that it would also be dependant on numerous factors in that particular person's life. What's good for you as a small child may no longer apply when you're a teenager, let alone an adult. While for others, things do not change that dramatically with time.

So, in my view, all of the poll options could be correct depending on the personal situation.

Speaking in general terms, though, I would think that the final two poll options incorporate something that's vitally important at least for autistic children growing up, and that's the understanding of the people around you. If you grow up in an environment where you are given some space, where sensory overload is kept below levels where it gets too much, where you get the room to learn how to properly interact with the people around you yet you also get plenty of 'me'-time if you desire it, AND it's also a loving environment... I think those are requisite, at least growing up.

Upon reaching adulthood, I'm more reluctant to make any sweeping generalisations I'm normally so fond of making.

I chose living alone with the thought that if I desired someone to live with, I could always invite someone in as a roommate. I think it would be harder to kick someone out than to bring someone in.

I didn't answer the poll because (looking at it objectively and not from my personal standpoint) I couldn't pick just one option. For Aspies I just don't like the idea of sharing housing compared to living on your own, or with family you've grown up naturally with, or a partner (because that's technically a family unit or would-be family unit).

Not all the options are ideal for every Aspie. Take living on your own, not all Aspies are independent enough to do this and some may need supported housing. Even if independent enough, not all neighbourhoods are conducive for the Aspie to live without undergoing trauma.

If the option is family or a partner, the relationship might in some cases be fraught, and not harmonious enough in every case. Etc., etc.

Living alone for me, in theory living with a partner who understands you would be prefereable, but I just don't know how realistic that is. I tend to have pretty strong preferences about cleanliness and noise which means unless I'm with someone with similar preferences we'll just annoy each other. It's kind of sad that my current aspiration is just to have any stable job and stable living arrangements (although in the current economic climate even that seems quite hard to achieve), I feel like I should aim higher but really I just want something predictable and 'safe'. Once I get that then I can worry about what comes next...

I'd love to live with my girlfriend and our cats.

I wasn't sure what to select, since my ideal living style is living with just one person, either an understanding, loving man who I fancy, or a close relative who I trust.

I wouldn't want to live entirely on my own, because I seem to end up depressed when spending too much time on my own. I just go into myself and start talking to myself so much that I start to feel insane. Plus I'll feel lonely at night time, and also vulnerable. And I get freaked out or scared easily, so once I get the creeps from watching a scary film or seeing something scary on the internet or even watching the news, I don't know when to stop. I get the creeps so much that I feel ill, and all objects start to turn into scary things in my mind, and so on.

I would just like to live with another close person, but obviously still be independant, I do my own thing and they do their own thing, but we still be close and sit together in the evenings or other times in the day when we have spare time. So I could live with someone else without living in eachother's pockets (which is possible).

I think it depends on the aspie, I mean everybody is different no matter what. I myslef would love to just find the right guy for me and live with him in my own place.

Wow what an interesting and polar opposite result.

Jason

I can only speak for myself, but living alone would work best for me.

I've actually lived alone before. It works OK, but I'd rather have one person (whose not family) that understands me & gives me my own space, to live with.
Its nice to be needed. Even more to be understood!

Sincerely,
Matthew

^^^