dianthus wrote:
I've just been figuring this out lately and hope it helps someone.
I'm very sensitive to ridicule. I realized my sensitivity to it has gotten so bad in the last few years, that I now feel like I'm continually trying to avoid being ridiculed. Like trying really hard to not to make any little mistakes or flub anything, to hide anything weird or unusual about myself, and to avoid showing any real vulnerability or weakness around people who might laugh at it.
It's like I thought if only I could do everything the right way, no one would ever have the opportunity to ridicule me again. But in reality? People can ridicule ANYTHING. All it takes for instance is, repeating what someone said in a funny voice. Or imitating a gesture in an exaggerated way. Or simply reacting in mock astonishment to something. It doesn't take any special thought or wit or cleverness to do this. All it takes it the intent to belittle someone.
And the fact that this happens, doesn't mean that the person who is being ridiculed actually did anything worthy of being ridiculed. That's what is being implied by the person doing the ridiculing, but it's not true. They (or you, or I) may have done something that is perfectly respectable. In fact what people find ridiculous in one situation or culture, may be highly valued in another.
What I wanted to say to everyone, if anyone ridicules you, please don't assume that it means you're doing anything wrong. It probably just means that the person who is treating you that way has a real problem with themselves, and it's not about you at all. So don't be like me and start thinking that you can change your behavior to somehow gain this person's respect or avoid being treated that way.
the question you should be asking yourself is "why am I feeling belittled by _" and then go from there rather then avoiding ridicule(you won't be able to in any real sense)