When are people going to learn? (Bit of a rant)

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When are people going to learn that they can't change already made plans the last minute? It does my head in and now I'm extremely annoyed. I feel like hitting something. And why is it so difficult to not get very angry or very disappointed when someone changes my plans for me? If I change the plans myself, that's fine, but if someone else is doing it for me I get very upset.

Stick to the plan. Always stick to the plan!

They will never learn...

For some reason in English speaking society (and probably the rest of the world) staying on-course when there is not a significant reasons for differing is not an issue of politeness.

For me, I think it would be a great factor to include into etiquette. and I don't mean being inflexible... I simply mean you don't change your mind and alter the actions of those around you suddenly after a decision has been made without there being significant benefit to doing so.

however... I don't make up the rules unfortunately x.x

Also when people say 'hurry up I wanted to do this today but you were too slow' when they never told me that they wanted to do something in particular. They get angry at me even though they never even told me the important facts.

They can change their plans all they want. They can't change yours unless you are dependent on them in some way for your plans though.

I dislike it when plans get changed, unless it's something that I didn't really want to do anyway.

What I hate is when people make plans for me then inform me afterwards. It's common courtesy to ask me first.

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

wel the thing is, people can change their minds at the very last moment.

Only way I can see why plans would change the last minute is if the restaurant you guys planned to eat at was closed or were too full so the waiting take too long to get a table. or you go to a movie you guys planned to see and the tickets were sold out. I don't get mad at anyone for this because it's not their fault and they couldn't help it. But if the movie was so popular and it kept getting sold out, I would suggest we get the tickets hours before the movie starts. As for restaurants, I suggest people pick other restaurants to eat at for in case we can't eat at the first one.

I know people can change their mind at the last moment and I know I probably shouldn't be so inflexible but what I mean is I get upset when people change their mind and change the plans when they know how difficult I think it is. I don't even know why that is. I don't know why I get so angry when it happens. But it happens anyway.

I hate it when plans change too.

A cancelation is bad. Finding out I suddenly have to do something I wasn't planning on is worse!

Oh, I so can't deal well with sudden changes in plans, or even worse, someone making plans for me. It's not as bad now that I live alone, but it was horrible when I lived with relatives. It was sometimes necessary to make plans to do things together, or to do things for one another. NTs are good at making and changing plans on short notice, but can't understand that for some people this is hard or nearly impossible. Because they can't understand, they get upset with people like us not being able to handle the sudden change in course. I'm not a race car, I am a horse drawn carriage, and the horse is a tired out old plug, with four flat feet. I don't take sudden changes in my daily routine very well. One problem I still have with relatives, is they do occasionally drop in without letting me know first. AAAHHH!! !
My other health problems cause me to have a very irregular personal schedule. I sleep when very tired, and may be awake in the middle of the night. Because of this I also eat at any hour of the day/night, depending on how hungry I am and how long it's been since I last ate. Also, I have IBS and am in the bathroom for long periods of time when I have to go. I prefer some warning that someone is coming, so I can let them know if I am about to use the john, or not, or am about to go to sleep, or eat a meal, etc. Having people drop over without warning drives me nuts. Unfortunately, my extrovert father and my step mom don't have a problem with "dropping in" on people. They are elderly and retired, so they have more free time. They have trouble grasping that it might not be convenient for the people they decide to visit.

I think too many people have trouble comprehending that everyone is a separate "sphere", with their own wants, needs, and plans. Then these people make decisions, and try to include and direct other people in those decision, but not always consulting with the others, or letting them know far enough in advance, because the other "spheres" are perceived as an extension of the directing person's sphere. It's a kind of self centeredness, that is usually not intended in a nasty way, but it does cause a lot of problems.

Me, I just want to head for the hills when my snow bird parents come back for the warm months towards the end of April.