Starving for love and affection

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Starving for love and affection we don’t know by instinct where to fix the limits of a relationship, so we want more than we can have, while we are less capable to give, to love, to protect, to tolerate other people’s failures, weaknesses needs. We lack the natural competence in the language, grammar or syntax of relating to others. It’s like missing the motive, the phrase, the theme; not being attuned in a musical duet or choir. It’s like doing the wrong step in a march or limping when we walk in company. It’s disharmony, dissonance, going astray, getting lost. In a school of fishes, in a flock of birds, in a pack of wolves each individual knows his place, by instinct, hasn’t learnt it. Birds fly thousands of miles keeping the same vicinity to others and the same distance. If they don’t they have a rough life, or perish.

OH, I COULD reciprocate to a good degree. MY problem is seeing the cues and acting on them. Perhaps I have just been too nice and considerate. My language and grammer used to be impeccable.

I bet you I would be a great father also. Too many make lots of mistakes. That would be one thing that would probably "make me come out of my shell".

Steve

i think thats all anyone wants is to be loved. and to love personally i dont love anyone, i dont think i ever will, im just not good at it. if i got into a relationship where love was needed i'd try making the other person happy even if they walked all over me. i know this because when i was little and had some friends i was always trying to please them, i think i did that because i was afraid they could always go somewhere else looking for a new friend and quit being mine. i find that pets that are not cats and dogs provide the best love, i like waterdogs, weasdels and horses. horses are really great companions, very loving and trustworthy. i dont have a horse but my neighbour does and he lets me come over to his house to take care of the horse, and be its friend.

anyways i guess what im trying to say is everything has to be clicking in the right direction for someone from when they were a child to adult to adequetly and properly love another human.

I think I've been pretending too long in order to be able to function in this NT world that I'm not sure I could be real with anything, uncluding love.

I used to love some people, but realized it wasn't reciprocal. They often said they loved me, but their actions didn't match what they said. That realization really sucked at first. It is still sad, but I get a lot of comfort from realizing I'm not pretending to be in a reciprocal, loving relationship. My dog is very comforting. She doesn't pretend. She is also very giving. She makes it easy for me to be happy to come home.

Or cause a mid-air collision that will be blamed on international bird terrorism.

The war on duck terrorism will begin then and the swan community will object.

But the ducks will place them in detainment camps where they will be tortured and sucked into jet engines.

Wait.. what the hell am I talking about?