Do Aspies have fewer and simpler emotional needs?

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Do you have simple emotional needs?
Aspie male: yes 27%  27%  [ 13 ]
Aspie male: no 14%  14%  [ 7 ]
Aspie female: yes 27%  27%  [ 13 ]
Aspie female: no 33%  33%  [ 16 ]
NT male: yes 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
NT male: no 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
NT female: yes 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
NT female: no 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Total votes : 49

Aharon
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30 Mar 2012, 10:41 am

In Temple Grandin's "Thinking in Pictures", she says she has emotions, but they're simpler than other peoples, "like a growl compared to a thunderstorm", she writes. She also makes it clear she has never been in a relationship. I wondered if what she described would, across the spectrum and particularly with aspie females, indicate that aspies may have fewer and simpler emotional needs. I for example, don't feel that emotionally complex, and feel my emotional needs are very basic and few. What do you think?


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fraac
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30 Mar 2012, 10:46 am

A lot of nonautistic 'emotion' looks like silly involvement to me. I answered yes but that's not exactly how I see it.



Aharon
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30 Mar 2012, 10:52 am

Well, do you think an aspie male who made a NT women feel neglected would make you feel the same way, or do you think it's possible the NT woman could be wailing over those silly emotions you described? Just curious.


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fraac
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30 Mar 2012, 10:59 am

I'm not sure. Isn't it very subjective? Everyone takes themselves seriously.



Sora
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30 Mar 2012, 11:08 am

Not sure what to vote.

I may have simpler, fewer emotional needs. After all, I don't get lost in dramatic emotionally complicated relationships.

I don't have the same qualitative complexity of emotions towards others. It doesn't surprise me however because I don't experience the same qualitative complexity of communication and social interaction with other either.

On the other hand, I feel as if I have very complex emotions.

My emotions are intense, very detailed and pretty much always highly specific. I usually have different emotions towards different things at once too.

To me, what I feel is usually easy to identify as well, I certainly don't have drama and unidentified drives going on in my subconscious mind.

So... the quality of emotions is different than that of normal people.

"More" emotions or "less" emotions fail to explain it in my case.


Edit: reconsidering this, I seem to have somewhat unusual experiences specifically in the departments of forms of sympathy/affection, dislike/animosity and nervousness/anxiety. I'm using these words but not in the way that others do from what has been investigated so far.

Such as that I'd say that I'm really afraid of elevators because I dislike getting stuck and really hate getting stuck with lots of people but I don't hesitate to use them and ride them for pure entertainment sometimes when there's the chance to. However, most people take the expression "I am afraid of" to mean a slightly different emotional experience apparently.

I do think that these differences are partly a direct result of the fact that all of these emotional experience are highly dependant on social interaction and identification with other people/their state of mind.


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Last edited by Sora on 30 Mar 2012, 11:32 am, edited 1 time in total.

ByattBrown
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30 Mar 2012, 11:11 am

I personally find that I am over emotional, most certainly not less.

Sometimes I get an emotional reaction to something that is too strong, more than others.

I have seen this happen with other aspies to, some children I have worked with will show regularly emotions that are greatly heightened, like bursting into tears from something small, get angry or crack up with laughter and not be able to stop.

But I have worked with others who show no or little emotions.


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Roman
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30 Mar 2012, 11:14 am

Lets take rejection. Apparently I am MORE emotional about the FACT that I was rejected; after all I would obsess about it for several days. But at the same time I was LESS emotional about fashion which is the reason I WAS rejected to begin with.



btbnnyr
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30 Mar 2012, 11:19 am

I have simple emotions and simple emotional needs and wants. I have the emotions of a ten-year-old girl. My emotions are simple and strong.



Joe90
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30 Mar 2012, 11:37 am

I don't quite understand what ''emotional needs'' means. I'm full of emotion, most of my thoughts and intentions are based on emotion.


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marshall
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30 Mar 2012, 12:10 pm

I have slightly different emotional needs than most people, not necessarily fewer. I have the need to be engrossed in some kind of hobby or special interest and need my alone time free of noise and distractions for deep thinking. That doesn't mean I don't get lonely and don't desire companionship. If anything I seem to struggle more finding the appropriate balance between solitary and social needs.

I seem to struggle a lot with maintaining long-distance friendships. I just don't have the inclination to want to call or write to people I don't have regular face-to-face contact with. My father seems to think there's something emotionally defective in not having the automatic inclination to "stay in touch" with people. But maybe I just hate using the telephone and writing email because it seems to take undue effort for me as opposed to other people who just do it on a whim.



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30 Mar 2012, 12:12 pm

I'm convinced I got manic depression along with Asperger's. Apparently the two are linked. [I'll be laughing then a bad thought pops into my head and I'm unhappy for hours, then I cheer up in a few minutes.]

So...no. Not at all.



Asp-Z
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30 Mar 2012, 12:23 pm

On the contrary, my emotions are very complex. I rarely even understand them myself. Strangely, I seem to be able to exert quite a bit of control over them, however.



pschristmas
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30 Mar 2012, 1:36 pm

Aharon wrote:
In Temple Grandin's "Thinking in Pictures", she says she has emotions, but they're simpler than other peoples, "like a growl compared to a thunderstorm", she writes. She also makes it clear she has never been in a relationship. I wondered if what she described would, across the spectrum and particularly with aspie females, indicate that aspies may have fewer and simpler emotional needs. I for example, don't feel that emotionally complex, and feel my emotional needs are very basic and few. What do you think?


Okay, it took me a few readings to get what you meant. I'm split on this idea. I have quite complex emotions, but my emotional needs don't seem to be as encompassing as others'. I do experience the subtler emotions like the sense of bittersweetness over certain memories, etc., and I can be moved deeply by some experiences. On the other hand, I rarely miss people when they are gone and can quite happily go for weeks without contact with even close family members or friends. My daughter's gotten used to this and knows it doesn't reflect on my feelings for her; it still drives my mother nuts. My grandmother used to say that I was sufficient unto myself, and that describes it quite nicely.

In the one major relationship I've had, my husband once told me that he didn't think I was capable of loving, but I know full well that I am -- thirteen years after his death, he is still my love, so it must have something to do with the way I express love rather than my experience of it.



Aharon
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30 Mar 2012, 1:47 pm

Yeah I had a hard time putting this one into words. I can see it in my head though.


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UnLoser
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30 Mar 2012, 1:49 pm

I'm not sure if I really understand what you mean by emotional needs. Do you mean how much I crave and rely on close relationships with others? If so, then I feel very normal in that regard.



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30 Mar 2012, 2:00 pm

I don't really have a frame of reference so I can't really accurately judge.