Have you been able to repair your relationships?

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Have you been able to repair your relationships, friendships, acquaintanceships, etc...Or do things just go downhill to the point where you feel apologizing (or whatever it takes to make things 'right' again) only makes things worse?

In my experience, most people seem to like me less in the long run, with the exception of a few so far.

For example, I'll see an acquaintance in passing from time to time and we'll have a conversation, only for the person to avoid me after a while. However, if a significant amount of time passes, the person says "Hi" to me again but that's the extent of it. Absence seems to make the heart grow fonder...

I know one acquaintance who stopped talking to me. She stopped saying "Hi" and initiating contact and began to only speak when spoken to. In this case, I feel like I did something wrong without knowing what it was, and any future attempts to "repair" things will only make things worse.

I wonder if it is possible for an Aspie to "repair" lost connections with people. For example, if you feel like things are going downhill and someone no longer likes you anymore......Does attempting to fix it work for you, or does this only make things worse?

Have you ever had success in repairing lost connections with people or do you burn bridges?

I don't know about others, but I've never been able to apologise. It's just something I can't do, no matter how much the situation demands it; it just feels fake and wrong, even if I want to mean it.

As I'm currently in my first relationship (And hopefully, won't need to ever find another one) I can't count the amount of times I've done something amazingly stupid.

Fortunately, Makayla's quite forgiving on that front :3 Forgiveness and continuing onwards is the best solution xD.

I'm a huge bridge burner, but I'm not proud about it. Part of it is lacking confidence in any complicated social exchanges, and part is sheer pride and stubbornness. I've always had a mindset of not needing people, so why the heck should I chase them down. There have been exceptions for a few people, but not many.
Your description does sound like a natural progression of many interactions I've witnessed. Long term friendships almost seem like a rarity, or a matter of convenience sometimes. Of course, this is just from the outside looking in.

Nope, it seems like once it goes wrong, that's it.

I've been able to repair some with honesty and accepting that I won't necessarily get my way. Sometimes there are fundamental flaws or incompatibilities in a relationship, though.

With men, I have never been able to repair relationships and have had much animosity in my life. I tend not to fall out with women friends but struggle to sustain friendships so there is rarely anything to repair.

I have one friend with whom I have had major conflicts more than one time, but we always reunite. Otherwise, - I am a bridgeburner too.

There comes a point in every relationship when it seems better just to let it go than to spend any more time and effort on it.

HAHA nope!

I suck at repairing relationships

Makes it worse times 1000, and is usually what kills it completely.



I don't try to burn bridges, but things always work out that way. In one case, I knew that the other person didn't know what else to do and neither did I.

Major bridgeburner. One person has survived the process; she thrives on confrontation & something constructive comes from it. But she's insane -- and the exception. Most people just go on shopping for people -- like vending machines in human form. Strange planet.

One of the, yes. Can't say I even care about the other two "friendships" that have been wrecked. But they're the ones with the problem and not me.

I find it best to leave it for a while and it does tend to then sort itself out.

If it's just someone I casually know, like a coworker or classmate, I just let it go and they might come back around. Chances are I did something odd that made them question my sanity and/or motives. Chasing after them to try to talk it out is only going to confirm to them I really am weird and possibly even a stalker.

If it's a friend that's known me for some time then I have enough rapport with them to say something like "Hey, I noticed you haven't been coming around lately. Did I do something to offend you?" It gives them the "out" where they can say something dismissive like they've just been busy but go back to avoiding me or gives them the opportunity to voice their issue with me and me the chance to explain. Either way, I let it go after that. I may mentally get hung up on it wondering what I did wrong but approaching the person again starts getting into that being creepy zone again.

In the past 10 years I made two major coast to coast moves (Philly to Vegas & Vegas to Florida) so I lost any friends I had twice. I've kept in touch with a few people via facebook but I wouldn't hold my breath to see any of them again.

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

I have known my wife since I was 13.

I have often worked hard to reapair that relationship.

But others, well--you can't repair it if you don't understand how it broke. Some I am glad to see the back of because it got to be more trouble than it was worth, others... I will never understand what went wrong.