What does this mean?

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This was written about me by the psych I saw last week. I just wondered what it means, please:

"Her mood was subjectively okay and objectively it was reactive"

Also, although I told him about my hallucinating when stressed, he has written: "She had no perceptual abnormalities in any sensory modalities"

Finally, although I have a dx of depression and I was open about it, the doctor has written "No evidence suggestive of mental illness". Possibly depression doesn't count as mental illness in this context, but it was my impression that it did.

Reading what he has written about me, and the impression he has taken from a one hour session, I am a little confused by some discrepancies between his report and what I actually said. I'm not terribly worried, but... disappointed, maybe? I was direct in my answers and felt I articulated well.

I have read everything doctors and therapist have wrote about me and I have concluded they are stupid. If you strongly disagree, get a new doctor / therapist cause its only going to get worse. Although on the no perceptual abnormalities thing, they might have meant that you were not visibly hallucinating. For example, you were not completely out of it or interacting with things around you that were not there.

^^^ Yeah I'm glad I requested a copy of his report. It's kind of pissed me off actually. Much of what he wrote was fine, but saying I don't have a mental illness when it's already in my notes is just ridiculous.

I probably won't get the same guy again anyway, from what he told me it will be a while before I'm able to see anyone again. I'm just annoyed because it took quite a bit of energy to get the appointment sorted, to get my head in the right place, to actually go...

never mind

The sad reality is that no one in the mental health system can help you, they will almost certainly make your life deteriorate. I do just fine with as little contact as possible and when I am engaged in the mental health system, I am normally getting pretty screwed. My advice is cope in your own way. Rather that is isolation or whatever. The mental health system is not as evolved as its medical counterpart. Your better off without them if you can cope on your own at all. I would use them as a last result, I wouldn't even see hallucinations as a bad thing if you can just ignore them and as long as you can tell what is real.

Thanks, my general impression of mental health services has usually been that they can't help me so I think you're right.

He was pushing meds at the end and I don't want that for myself. I think it would be best if I stay clear. I just wanted someone to talk to, or somewhere to be where I could actually be matter-of-fact about my mental health when I get particularly messed up. But I think that's wishful (read: desperate) thinking lol

I'm not an expert in medical jargon, but I'll venture a guess of what it might mean.
The first line seems to at that you were ok compared to what you usually seem like to him, but that comparing you to an average person, you were rather reactive.
The second line seems to imply that he did not believe you were having hallucinations.

^^^ I should have said, it was the first time I'd met him. What does 'reactive' mean in this context?

And screw him if he didn't believe me about hallucinating! But surely if he didn't believe me he would have written 'claims to have had...' or similar, as I imagine pretending to have had such mental problems is a mental problem all on its own... Honestly though it seems more like he wasn't listening to me. He was quite patronising and until he asked me about my performance in school he was treating me like I wasn't very bright.

I know I shouldn't have got my hopes up but I am very disappointed by this report .

^ Sorry to hear your encounter wasn't the most positive!.. It seems pretty common unfortunately ... As you know with my experience of late! Seems many so called professionals dont really know what they are talking about half the time, would be interesting to know if these wold be the same reactions with people outside the spectrum or if it really is that people dont generally have TOM of those on the spectrum. As i find when talking i feel they must be getting what i say then when i get to read the their report im flabbergasted at how wrong their ideologies are. I have no problem with admitting things that may be presented to me if factual, but just seem they get well paid for a very bad guessing game!... Its also hard to find a second opinion or to find someone that you can connect with because as you know very few people are specialized in this area and some of the ones that think they are seems very obvious they dont have a clue but think they do! Its funny in some ways as much of the stigmas that are represented as fact amongst those on the spectrum often tend to be much stronger amongst the NT and specialist world, ie theory of mind, rigid thought processes etc, i find it almost laughable if it wasn't so tragic... I have actually found that my journey with this thus far has created more tension and anxiety.. The people that i thought i was supposed to be getting help from are now the people causing the most stress in my life...It really is ironic how few listen to their clients, as i mentioned in another post i think a good specialist is 'fluid' with their client but have found many to be fixated on what they THINK they know as opposed to listening to what they should know...
However there are some good ones out their and if possible might need to do a little shopping in that department... It isn't easy for those on the spectrum to express themselves on the spot, or explain how they feel..
Big hugs

I also think that maybe when he mentions 'reactive' , he was talking about how you respond as a few on the spectrum can often take pauses when asked questions, seems he was implying you were reacting without the pauses or mutism.... maybe?

Last edited by Uncle on 07 Nov 2016, 4:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The annoying thing is I thought I did express myself properly on this occasion. I kept my answers short and to the point, which was easier for me and which should have made it easier for him to understand. I mean he has blatantly written the opposite to some of the things I said. I know you have had similar experiences so I don't need to tell you lol

Clearly he didn't listen to me, or didn't hear/choose to hear what I was saying. I can't say whether this was because I'm an aspie though; I also get patronised because I'm young, and/or because I'm female, so take your pick really. You never know, maybe next time I'll get a different psych.

I figured you were able to express yourself well I just didnt want to presume hence throwing out the hypothetical
I also understand what you mean by the 'need to talk'... As its not easy finding someone you can express yourself with, its an area i also think that many psychologists dont 'get'.. As its the same for me, i just want to be able to express myself to the person im talking to most of the time as a way of release... As sometimes the most simplest of therapies can be the most rewarding, but again i think this is an area many haven't quit acknowledged as yet..