Misdiagnosed As OCD and ADHD and Difficulty Driving.

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Dear Everyone,
I contacted the local Vocational Rehabilitation Center hoping to be properly diagnosed a while ago. Unfortunately, they are a state-supported institution, and the evaluation methods are not as comprehensive as they should be for Asperger's Syndrome. My report screams Asperger's! They said I only have OCD and ADHD. That makes no sense! How many people with ADHD are able to meet weekly deadlines for three different advanced-pace curriculum courses in college and make the President's and Dean's List the majority of their time at a University without being on medications? I figure not many.

I also learned my cousin has two sons with Asperger's Syndrome. I have always had an unusual habit and still do despite being nearly 30 years of age of walking on my toes. It turns out, my cousin does that as well! Though I have a great deal of empathy, I apparently am not very good at showing it. I always thought it was a result of having a poor relationship with my parents, and that I am just emotionally reserved. I am more comfortable revealing my feelings by writing on the computer or writing poetry or songs in a notebook. Much of the time, I do not even want to speak to anyone. I contacted a psychologist who is well-educated on Adult Asperger's. She believes I have it, but I cannot afford $1,500 to be evaluated by her. She told me Vocational Rehabilitation used to work with her, but they would no longer after a while due to her being too expensive. Who needs quality, right?

I contacted Vocational Rehabilitation in hopes of them finding a way to teach me how to drive. When I get in the car, I get so disoriented! I even mix up left and right! Once, someone honking a horn startled me so badly while I was practice driving that I let go of the wheel in the middle of a busy intersection and almost hit a laundry truck after drifting into the opposite side of the road! I have tried to get a job, but feel partly the reason I have not gotten one is due to not having a driver's license. I seem to be the only 29 year-old on the planet that cannot drive! The Rehab people have not helped me at all except they are going to have me see a career counselor and do a trial work experience. If I still cannot drive and get a job that pays more than minimum wage so I can afford to move out of my parents' house, how is that supposed to help anything at all? Any help you can provide or insight is greatly appreciated. Thank you!

Sincerely,
Jinberly

Me. I was active duty military (working about 50-60 hours a week), going to school full time, and graduated with honors and distinction while taking some grad level courses. It's possible. I've met a lot of highly successful and driven ADHDers out there. Some I never even suspected at first. I still meet deadlines. It is just way harder for me than others.

What was the purpose of your diagnosis, may I ask? For your own information? To obtain support? Will something be denied to you because you do not have a official autism label?

I ask these questions because the reality is that for some people, distinctions between these diagnoses are very subtle. My son, for example, carries a primary diagnosis of ADHD, but also has NVLD, which in him presents very closely to mild AS. I cannot tell where one ends and one begins. It's all part of the same thing for him.

If the purpose of your diagnosis was for your own information, the letters assigned to you are meaningless. What counts is what you do with this knowledge and you can still use the knowledge you gained to learn compensatory strategies.

I cannot tell my left from my right. Never have been able to. I used to play rugby and taped my right wrist so that when the call was to go right, I didn't go left. When you are driving, particularly when you are going to have to take the test, make some kind of physical marker for "right" so that when they say "turn right" you know which way to go. Just keep practicing. Some people learn new motor tasks more slowly and until the physical aspects of driving become over-learned and second-nature, driving is hard. Just stay persistent.

Could you move somewhere with good public transport?

Dear InThisTogether,
That is surprising you were able to make deadlines with ADHD. You are the first I had heard of who was not on medication to do so. However, I am aware that many with Asperger's Syndrome have ADHD as well as OCD as a byproduct of it. The reason I suspect it is due to a number of issues. I have never felt like I belonged anywhere. It has always made me feel like a freak. People always seem to treat me as such. Although I do have a habit of rocking from side to side, it is something I normally only do at home. Still, this is an Asperger's trait.

I was never shy with my parents when I was young, but then in school, I would hardly speak at all. I was always a good student as long as I applied myself, but as I got older, fitting in was impossible. Mom always said I seemed to be in my own world, because I would not notice when someone else was talking to me. Socializing has always been awkward for me. I am just no good at it! I have difficulty discussing anything other than what I read about, such as medical research or forensics on television. For some strange reason, I cannot just stop myself and am compelled to tell everyone everything I read on a topic. For some strange reason, no one seems to care about the mycelial form of fungi or what hyphae are. LOL!

I also have extremely sensitive hearing, particularly with certain sounds. I can hear my father drop a fork on the carpet in the kitchen at the other end of the house with my bedroom door closed and my head under the pillow! This noise actually startles me and forces me to bolt upright. The phone ringing, dogs barking, my bedroom door opening, and various other noises either make me extremely irritable or want to cry. This cannot be normal! I have to wear Dad's earmuffs from when he used to practice shooting his guns to help me tolerate these sounds and make them more bearable, though they are still quite bothersome. Interestingly, I could listen to music around the clock if possible. I love it! Watching television is also difficult at times. I get so distracted by the visual part that I miss what is said, or vice-versa. Sensory overload appears to be a major problem for me, and I believe that is what is making driving so difficult.

If I am properly diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, I could get Sensory Integration Therapy to help with this issue. Since I live out in the county, the buses do not come out here. Our town is small enough that there is not a subway system accessible. I would gladly move if it were affordable. There is also therapy to teach you how to socialize effectively. Everyone else always thought I was strange, despite my best efforts to dress and act like them.
Most of what little social or pop culture items I know are things I repeat from television. I have always quoted shows excessively, and also am able to mimic any foreign accent and many animal noises. I usually do not make them at inappropriate times, though. However, the pop culture information shared sometimes is out of place. Mom and Dad also said adults could not believe how advanced my vocabulary was at a young age. Apparently, I have a very formal way of speaking, because a friend teased me recently for using the word cretin.

When I get in the car, there are all of these things to monitor. It is information overload. The best way I know how to explain it is that my brain seems to be like a computer. When too many commands are given by visual or other stimuli, the system sort of shuts down. I have felt since birth that I was dropped into the middle of the desert without a compass, just wandering through life and barely surviving. There seems to be no oasis present anywhere. Asperger's makes so much sense. I hope this answers your question!

Sincerely,
Jinberly