Can Aspies and those with LFA relate to each other

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Has anyone else have an expirence like this before: when I was child me and my cousin, who was a bit older than older than me, used to play and understand each other like two NTs would, but I'm diagnosed with Aspergers and she was diagnosed with LFA . We were very young at the time we played and talked, but as time went on we talked less, and it as if I developed more than she did. We barely talk anymore, she can speak a few basic sentences at most. Is it possible that my Aspergers and her LFA were on the same developmental point, and at some point she stopped developing and I continued to develop? And do I still have the ability to relate to her again or someone else with LFA?

Yes, it's possible.

Despite innumerable efforts, I lack the ability to form ANY significant bonds with human beings, autistic people included.

I dunno about you and some random person with LFA, because people are different from each other, and how can anyone predict how you'll get along with some person about whom we know nothing other than a diagnosis they have?

But you and your cousin? I bet you could reconnect. You're different now; you've learned faster than her; but the person you used to be is still a part of you, and the person she used to be is still part of her. Why not try? She's family; you're both on the spectrum; you had fun together before--the worst thing that could happen is you'll confuse each other and realize you're not particularly close anymore. Since she doesn't speak much, try not focusing too much on language. Perhaps that'll let the non-language communication get through better.

Even if you don't understand her better than you would if you were NT, you're still cousins and rekindling the friendship would probably be worth it. Maybe I'm just being sentimental about family ties, but sometimes, when disability is involved, the people in your family are the people you feel close to by default, and that overcomes the awkwardness people tend to feel when they are trying to get to know somebody who is very different from themselves.

I've heard of interactions going both ways (between people with AS and LFA) good or bad.

I'd say it's certainly possible, but if it doesn't happen that way, you'll need to be prepared for that. If you can handle that, I'd say give it a shot. Learn about and how to relate to her, do some research and talk to her parents, especially if she is still in their care, for information about her and to make sure they don't have any major issue with what you want to do (because you never know).

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, as they say

I have an LFA cousin, who moved into my house for six months when my uncle who'd most likely be diagnosed Aspergers today moved his family in with us when DCF came after him for homeschooling his kids...and living in a shed with no running water or power. Anyway, LFA cousin intentionally annoyed me every single time I walked up the stairs by singing a little song, and I went off and yelled at him a few times. This was when I was like 11, and he was like 17 or 18. He also did a similar thing to my mother, too. As far as his verbal skills, wasn't completely nonverbal, but wasn't terribly verbal. Also, both his kids, never saw other kids at all, or people for that matter really.

So my experience, I did NOT get along well with my LFA person, and I didn't get along well with my uncle who's likely got Aspergers, and rather severe Aspergers at that. I don't tend to do well with people with mental handicaps in general, either. I can't relate to them very well.

I actually had the same experience as you, theoddone. There was a girl (who is the same age as me) who lived in a nearby neighborhood and played with when I was only 4-5 years old. We were both diagnosed on the autism spectrum at an early age. At the time, we were probably at the same developmental point. However, as time went on, I developed a whole lot more than she did. By this, I mean that I developed the ability to talk in multiple complex sentences at a time whereas she could barely talk (except that she can sing which sounds more like yelling to me the last time I heard her "sing"). Today, I am considered to be a high-functioning autistic (not an Aspie since I didn't start talking until I was 4) in senses other than that I could talk. The girl that I am talking about would probably be considered to be a low-functioning autistic.

I volunteer with LFAs, and I'm very good at relating to them. They seem to know I'm different and are often more responsive to me than to anyone else. The way I see it, very often LFAs are like 'aspies magnified' - we have the same quirks, but in LFAs these are taken to such an extreme that they cause serious problems in functioning.

It can be possible for some Aspie people but not me. I have a friend who has a teenage brother who is severely Autistic. He doesn't live at home now, he lives in a care home because he needs to be looked after 24/7. He has never spoken a word in his life and is just happy dancing around in a nappy in a room with no other people around, and just arranges objects in the way he wants, and has thick curtains up to block out all the light. And when we sometimes go to see him, I feel I cannot relate to him in any way. I feel neurotypical compared to him!

What worries me a bit about Aspies who say they can relate better to more severe autistics is that it makes you vulnerable to assumptions...

Like if you assume you are understanding them fine, and you aren't, you would be more likely to stick with that assumption and end up with problems, than if you were NT and knew you couldn't understand them all the time.

It's a wonderful thing to interact with as many Spectrum people as you can, just remember that being on the spectrum yourself doesn't make you immune to mistakes, even hurtful mistakes.

Don't get me wrong--I do think that being on the spectrum is an advantage--but it's not a magic spell that lets you perfectly understand each other! Be prepared for some fumbling and misinterpretation, just like when you try to understand NTs.

I don't see why not. I try to bond with everybody NT or not, no matter what their challenges are. I knew of a boy with LFA that I felt connected to as a child.

Relate to as well as anyone else (which is to say, not that well on the scale of probability).

Sometimes when stimming when I see a LFA spinning I know he/she is happy because when Im spinning I am happy lol anything else? not really.

Can Aspies and those with LFA relate to each other?


Depending upon the individuals involved, I'm sure they can.


TheSunAlsoRises

Currently I'm participating in an autistic support group for young adults as a 'helper'. There are facilitators or instructors, and I'm not one of them. I try to relate to the members. They are diagnosed with a variety of labels, most of them are MFA I think. I just let them talk about their interests, whatever it is, and answer all their often weird and repeated questions. They ask a lot of questions. As for the obvious LFA members, it is very hard to relate to them. They are too much in their own world, interact little, and when they say something, it is often a one-way conversation. Too often I can't even understand - with my limited ability - what they say.