I don't under what (the definition of) empathy means

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I don't really understand what empathy means, or how it is different from sympathy. Isn't it true that people with autism have a different type of empathy but not a lack of empathy?

From wikipedia:
Empathy is the capacity to recognize feelings that are being experienced by another sentient or semi-sentient (in fiction writing) being. Someone may need to have a certain amount of empathy before they are able to feel compassion

Empathy is distinct from sympathy, pity, and emotional contagion.[27] Sympathy or empathic concern is the feeling of compassion or concern for another, the wish to see them better off or happier. Pity is feeling that another is in trouble and in need of help as they cannot fix their problems themselves, often described as "feeling sorry" for someone. Emotional contagion is when a person (especially an infant or a member of a mob) imitatively "catches" the emotions that others are showing without necessarily recognizing this is happening.[28]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empathy

I started a thread on this a few days ago and concluded that aspies seem to have varying degrees of empathy raging from very little to almost equal to NT's in certain aspects. I think sympathy means you actually take over the person's feelings, while empathy means you can imagine what it must feel like for another persoon without actually feeling it yourself.

I thought this said it pretty well


"Difference between Sympathy and Empathy

Empathy is a much deeper sense of emotion and a sense that you can feel another's feelings and state of being along with feeling sympathetic to their issue. (Sometimes you can be empathetic and not sympathetic but this isn't as common, e.g., an abuser may understand the feeling of being abused, but still abuses.) Sympathy is a feeling of understanding the issue and wanting to help the one in need. Most of the time empathy and sympathy are used in a sense of sharing unhappy feelings, but the sharing of happy feelings is also possible. Here's an example:
Sympathy:I am sorry for your loss. What can I do to help you during this difficult time?

Empathy: I feel and understand your pain; my grandmother passed away last year as well."

http://robin.hubpages.com/hub/Sympathy_vs_Empathy

How does an NT take over someone else's feeling. This seems illogical. (I guess this is why I'm aspie, huh?)

Researchers redefine empathy, or make an attempt to define it when they research it. They can't even agree, so it's hard to give you an answer.

The researchers who made the IRI-test: empathy consists of a set of separate but related constructs. (...) The perspective taking (PT) scale measures the reported tendency to spontaneously adopt the psychological point of view of others in everyday life ("I sometimes try to understand my friends better by imagining how things look from their perspective"). The empathic concern (EC) scale assesses the tendency to experience feelings of sympathy and compassion for unfortunate others ("I often have tender, concerned feelings for people less fortunate than me"). The personal distress (PD) scale taps the tendency to experience distress and discomfort in response to extreme distress in others ("Being in a tense emotional situation scares me"). The fantasy (FS) scale measures the tendency to imaginatively transpose oneself into fictional situations ("When I am reading an interesting story or novel, I imagine how I would feel if the events in the story were happening to me").

The researchers who made the EQ-test; Definition of empathy: two components,Cognitive: recognition of someone else's thoughts and feelings, that's about putting yourself into someone else's shoes, to imagine what they might think or feel. The second component is called affective, and that's the emotional reaction, that when you recognize what someone's thinking or feeling, that it should be accompanied by an appropriate emotional reaction. Not just recognizing that someone is in pain, but caring about it. Wanting to alleviate their distress.

There are other definitions around, but it would be pointless to gather them all. I put more credit into the IRI-test (Interpersonal Reactivity Index) than the EQ-test though.