Upset if social error is pointed out, don't care if intellec
.....intellectual mistake is pointed out.
When I do a social error, whether I'm aware of it or not, and somebody overreacts, I usually get upset and feel patronised or embarrassed, and cry or get angry with myself. But when, say, if I get a simple sum wrong and somebody facepalms because they're like ''even a 5-year-old could work that out!'', I really don't care. I just laugh at myself and go, ''gosh, I'm so dumb!''
It seems I'm not that ashamed of being bad at maths or bad at reading or bad at fixing a virus on a computer or bad at other logical things, but when it comes to being bad at social skills, I get really ashamed. Sometimes I do wish I was more able to work out logical problems like other Aspies, but it doesn't bother me that I can't, and I don't get jealous of others who can. But I get horribly jealous of those who are good at anything to do with social interaction or relationships or anything remotely to do with the social side of life. Is anyone else like this? Is this weird (for an Aspie)?
_________________
Female
outofplace
Veteran
Joined: 10 Jun 2012
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,771
Location: In A State of Quantum Flux
I can get upset at both, actually. I am a perfectionist and hate to do anything wrong. I have gotten better about it as I have gotten older but mistakes of any kind still bother me.
_________________
Uncertain of diagnosis, either ADHD or Aspergers.
Aspie quiz: 143/200 AS, 81/200 NT; AQ 43; "eyes" 17/39, EQ/SQ 21/51 BAPQ: Autistic/BAP- You scored 92 aloof, 111 rigid and 103 pragmatic
Because it's an area in which you care a lot about and feel inadequate to other people in. So when they point out a mistake it feels like there rubbing your nose in it even when there not.
_________________
AQ 41
Your Aspie score: 139 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 68 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
When I was younger, I used to get really upset and embarressed but now not as much. For me, I will get upset depending on how the social mistake is pointed out. If its pointed out in a "scolding a child-like way", I will get upset. More so because its rather demeaning.
Of course I used to get upset for people pointing out academic mistakes too. I dont mind as much if its a math/science/tech related error. But when I was younger, I used to get so upset for English/writing errors. I always got so nervous whenever someone checked my essays. But overtime I learned to suck it up, hold my breathe and hold it in. I still perfer to walk out of the room when someones looking at my essays.
I guess it's because the reason you are labeled as disabled is because of the social flaws, and you don't like being labeled as disabled, or something like that that is a bit more subconscious.
_________________
Cinnamon and sugary
Softly Spoken lies
You never know just how you look
Through other people's eyes
Autism FAQs http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt186115.html
When I do a social error, whether I'm aware of it or not, and somebody overreacts, I usually get upset and feel patronised or embarrassed, and cry or get angry with myself. But when, say, if I get a simple sum wrong and somebody facepalms because they're like ''even a 5-year-old could work that out!'', I really don't care. I just laugh at myself and go, ''gosh, I'm so dumb!''
It seems I'm not that ashamed of being bad at maths or bad at reading or bad at fixing a virus on a computer or bad at other logical things, but when it comes to being bad at social skills, I get really ashamed. Sometimes I do wish I was more able to work out logical problems like other Aspies, but it doesn't bother me that I can't, and I don't get jealous of others who can. But I get horribly jealous of those who are good at anything to do with social interaction or relationships or anything remotely to do with the social side of life. Is anyone else like this? Is this weird (for an Aspie)?
Naa. My guess is if everyone had trouble with a certain something, such as "socializing," then no one would feel out of place. But it could be empathy playing on you, because they are visibly upset vs simply annoyed as in academic stuff, etc.
But myself, I don't cut the line with some type of mistake; but all mistakes are in the same boat --very annoying.
I also don't care if my physical disorder is pointed out either (ears and sinuses issues). If I have stuff leaking out of my ear, I don't get upset and wish I didn't have this trouble, I just go and get a tissue or cotton bud to clear it up. Or if my nose is bleeding, I don't get embarrassed, even if I'm out in public. In fact, I get sympathy out of people when this happens, like they offer me a tissue or ask if I'm all right, and I just say things like, ''yeah, I would be worried if this didn't happen to me!''
I suppose people are more tolerant of physical disorders (even if they appear disgusting), and people even seem tolerant of people with low IQ. I knew a lot of kids at school who had learning difficulties and were intellectually behind, and they never got picked on for it.
_________________
Female
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
Parent forced to put son in care as no gov support |
02 Oct 2024, 7:49 am |
Social mistakes you've learnt from. |
09 Oct 2024, 1:13 am |
Never liked clubs but seem to miss having a social life |
07 Sep 2024, 4:14 pm |
social anxiety caused by autism |
15 Oct 2024, 11:15 am |