Do you ever tell people you're autistic?

Page 1 of 5 [ 70 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next

Musicc
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 6 Aug 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 62
Location: India

12 Aug 2012, 1:52 am

Do you hide it, or do you tell them? Why, why not?



chris5000
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,599
Location: united states

12 Aug 2012, 1:53 am

no ones ever asked me but then again I dont socialize much



Mirror21
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Oct 2011
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,751

12 Aug 2012, 1:54 am

Usually hide it because A. its usually a problem when the person does not believe me and B I do not mention it until it is relevant.

I told someone once, because she was really mean. She was rude and upsetting and I did not know how to react so I dropped the conversation. She got upset and started saying that she had depression issues and stress and she is blunt and that people should keep that into account when she was mad. I told her well i am autistic and I do not use that as an excuse to be a b***h.



Bubbles137
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Oct 2010
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 563

12 Aug 2012, 2:03 am

Mirror21 wrote:
Usually hide it because A. its usually a problem when the person does not believe me and B I do not mention it until it is relevant.


Same here, although the mum of some kids I babysit (who's a psychologist) said she'd known from the first time she'd spoken to me which confused me a bit because people don't usually pick up on it. She said it's her job though, and it was kind of a relief to be able to be open about it for once (she didn't judge me at all). Don't think I'd be open with most people though- for me, it's so mild that they probably wouldn't believe me or if they did, they might start picking up on everything I do which I really don't like.



outofplace
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Jun 2012
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,771
Location: In A State of Quantum Flux

12 Aug 2012, 2:04 am

Sometimes I talk about my suspicions with others just to get a reaction. By this I don't mean an emotional one but rather to see if the other person thinks it's plausible. This is not a good idea, but I am flat out obsessed with it right now and sort of can't help myself.


_________________
Uncertain of diagnosis, either ADHD or Aspergers.
Aspie quiz: 143/200 AS, 81/200 NT; AQ 43; "eyes" 17/39, EQ/SQ 21/51 BAPQ: Autistic/BAP- You scored 92 aloof, 111 rigid and 103 pragmatic


dyingofpoetry
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Apr 2010
Age: 61
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,202
Location: Fairmont, WV

12 Aug 2012, 2:14 am

All the time.

I'd prefer that people know I'm on the spectrum than to just let them think I am weird, rude, incompetent, or socialpathic! (And they will pretty much make those assumptions). So why not educate them?


_________________
"If you can't call someone else an idiot, then you are obviously not very good at what you do."


jetbuilder
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2012
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,172

12 Aug 2012, 2:14 am

outofplace wrote:
Sometimes I talk about my suspicions with others just to get a reaction. By this I don't mean an emotional one but rather to see if the other person thinks it's plausible. This is not a good idea, but I am flat out obsessed with it right now and sort of can't help myself.


I've done this a couple times.

When I get my official Dx, that info will be "need to know".


_________________
Standing on the fringes of life... offers a unique perspective. But there comes a time to see what it looks like from the dance floor.
---- Stephen Chbosky
ASD Diagnosis on 7-17-14
My Tumblr: http://jetbuilder.tumblr.com/


outofplace
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Jun 2012
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,771
Location: In A State of Quantum Flux

12 Aug 2012, 2:17 am

jetbuilder wrote:
outofplace wrote:
Sometimes I talk about my suspicions with others just to get a reaction. By this I don't mean an emotional one but rather to see if the other person thinks it's plausible. This is not a good idea, but I am flat out obsessed with it right now and sort of can't help myself.


I've done this a couple times.

When I get my official Dx, that info will be "need to know".


Agree with you there! If I do get an official Dx, then I will only tell my family and close friends. One of those friends doubts my suspicions and I will probably want to tell him just to prove myself right.


_________________
Uncertain of diagnosis, either ADHD or Aspergers.
Aspie quiz: 143/200 AS, 81/200 NT; AQ 43; "eyes" 17/39, EQ/SQ 21/51 BAPQ: Autistic/BAP- You scored 92 aloof, 111 rigid and 103 pragmatic


League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,280
Location: Pacific Northwest

12 Aug 2012, 2:34 am

No because I am too mild and I don't think they would believe me or they would start making assumptions about me. Lot of stereotypes out there so even people more severe than me aren't believed. But my husband believed me. He sees it all the time because he lives with me. Plus I am embarrassed about it even though I know it's worth telling people at times. I did tell at one of the new support groups I joined that isn't autism related. Everyone else was saying what their conditions were during their introductions so I thought I would mine as well share mine. No one questioned it nor made assumptions and nothing changed.


_________________
Son: Diagnosed w/anxiety and ADHD. Also academic delayed and ASD lv 1.

Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.


nominalist
Supporting Member
Supporting Member

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jun 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,740
Location: Lower Rio Grande Valley of Texas (born in NYC)

12 Aug 2012, 2:37 am

I tell the world. It is all over my websites. However, I would not recommend that for most people.


_________________
Mark A. Foster, Ph.D. (retired tenured sociology professor)
36 domains/24 books: http://www.markfoster.net
Emancipated Autism: http://www.neurelitism.com
Institute for Dialectical metaRealism: http://dmr.institute


Oodain
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,022
Location: in my own little tamarillo jungle,

12 Aug 2012, 2:47 am

most of my close firends know, not that that is all that many.

other than that i keep it on a need to know.


_________________
//through chaos comes complexity//

the scent of the tamarillo is pungent and powerfull,
woe be to the nose who nears it.


The_Postmaster
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 209

12 Aug 2012, 2:47 am

I've only told two of my closest friends, they each had very different reactions:
1) When I told my closest male friend, he said he suspected I had it, and now whenever I use my Aspie memory/intelligence to my advantage he jokingly calls me out on it, as if I'm cheating in the game of life. We can make jokes about it and neither of us cares. This is, in my opinion, the ideal reaction. I'd like to be able to joke about AS with people, it makes it much easier than pretending it doesn't exist.
2) Since I told my closest female friend, she's sort of taken on a nurturing motherly role with me, for which I'm very grateful. For instance, she'll help me through tough social situations, give me social advice when I ask, and try to get me to be more social by inviting me to social gatherings of her group of friends. Unfortunately she overdoes the motherly thing sometimes, to the point where it can backfire on me. For instance, after socializing with her group of friends a couple of times I realized that I was attracted to one of her friends- we'll call her Gabrielle. Apparently I'm not Gabrielle's type, and I was willing to accept that and move on (Hard as it may be). My friend, however, wasn't, because it was the first time she'd seen me attracted to anyone, and tried repeatedly to "set us up", which, I suspect, may have made Gabrielle indirectly irritated with me.
I think these are both the best reactions I could have gotten, even if it's a bit overdone in the second example. A best same-sex friend you can be open with and don't have to hide your ASD from, and a best opposite-sex friend who will be willing to metaphorically hold your hand and be that nurturing, even slightly protective, big sibling type of person. It's a bit ironic in my case because I'm actually older than her by about a year.



AspieOtaku
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2012
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,051
Location: San Jose

12 Aug 2012, 2:54 am

Very rarely unless I feel it is necessary.


_________________
Your Aspie score is 193 of 200
Your neurotypical score is 40 of 200
You are very likely an aspie
No matter where I go I will always be a Gaijin even at home. Like Anime? https://kissanime.to/AnimeList


vanhalenkurtz
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 May 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 724

12 Aug 2012, 4:26 am

I live on a commune and nothing stays secret very long. Although I live nocturnally here and rarely interact with anyone, when I came off my migraine medication, I woke up earlier and had a lot more energy, so a lot of my aspie behaviors got observed, and commented upon. I made a community disclosure after it became obvious I had to address some community "concerns." Doing so changed nothing. Contrary to the usual token radical rhetoric about "celebrating diversity" I remain the weird person here. Whatever. I have no doubt if I ceased to be the battery-operated workaholic hammock producer that I am, my brothers and sisters would show me the door pronto. It's my experience disclosure appeals to those who like you, and means nothing to those who do not, unless they sort of resent you for attempting to be a bit more deserving of consideration than before.


_________________
ASQ: 45. RAADS-R: 229.
BAP: 132 aloof, 132 rigid, 104 pragmatic.
Aspie score: 173 / 200; NT score: 33 / 200.
EQ: 6.


so_subtly_strange
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 295

12 Aug 2012, 4:29 am

practically never. only if they mention autism first, and not necessarily even then. mainly because i dont have an official/professional diagnosis so it just seems too complicated to get involved in the whole story. not to mention who knows how they would react? bascially my knowledge of my autism is for my benefit, its fine for other people to just think i am strange. and i think most people dont really notice me at all which also works


_________________
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die.


analyser23
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 446

12 Aug 2012, 5:07 am

nominalist wrote:
I tell the world. It is all over my websites. However, I would not recommend that for most people.


How come you wouldn't recommend it for most people?